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#26
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Last time I went off my medications I attempted suicide but, I went off of them because I was depressed and figured they work working anyway. Which they weren't. I don't think going off medication had much to do with that.
I'm going to be going off my medication again soon too. No doctor just give up on them. I can't stand being hungry but having no desire to eat, being groggy and angry in the mornings, and I'm tired all the time, probably because I'm not able to eat enough and partly because lamotrigine. Oh and they don't really work that well anyway. Doctors don't listen and get frustrated when you don't follow their orders or tell them the side effects are intolerable. I'd like to see any one of them stay on meds when they can't enjoy food, sleep properly, wake up rested and have enough energy to do more than lie on the couch watching tv after work and on the weekends. Idiots. I'm done with medical "professionals". So is it possible to manage bipolar without meds? It isn't possible to manage it with meds so, there is that. |
![]() Alcinus_of_chell, lbrown1
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#27
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Quote:
I have been off meds for about 1 1/3 years...it can be done.
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Direction ![]() Ripple Effect - Small things can make a difference |
#28
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I was in a bad mood I'm just tired of having to take medication everyday to be "normal" I guess it does help though I haven't tried to hurt anyone as of late so maybe I will stay on it lol
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“When everything seem to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it ....” ― Henry Ford lamictal 200mg, synthroid 75 mcg, Testosterone injections thanks to lithium causing thyroid problems |
#29
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First of all you are not an idiot. Just messed up like most of us. I've tried 3 times to quit my meds and it was terrible. I've gotten severe anxiety and panic when I do. I ended up in the hospital. I'm pretty content for the most part with the meds I'm on now. I feel like I have a certain amount of control. It sounds like you just haven't found the right combination of meds. That can take years. I'd be scared to death to get off my meds again. So go slow and be careful. I would only get weened off by my psychiatrist. Good luck.
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#30
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Hi Clinte89 - I wish taking medication every day could make me something close to "normal". I take my meds because it gets me closer to normal, albeit still far off the desired outcome. I couldn't survive without meds so the improvement - they keep me alive but I still can't function unfortunately
![]() Lisa - you sounded really clear about how you wanted to go about things - it takes time to find the right therapist and stuff - how are you going in your search?
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Doing things my way, even if it isn't the usual way... |
#31
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I was diagnosed with BP 11 years ago. There have been times that I have gone off my meds due to unbearable side effects (Ages ago, before I had a psychiatrist, my family doctor put me on Zyprexa. I gained 30 lbs in 1 month. Not knowing what med was causing the weight gain made me quit everything cold turkey. It was a stupid move because I ended up hospitalized) I have been med free for 4 years now. I hate feeling drugged up all the time. It's almost as if I can feel the meds flowing through my body. I also hate not being able to FEEL. I dont feel "normal" when I don't have the highs and lows. I'm in a place right now that I'm really happy. I'm content with life and have a wonderfully supportive fiancé. I don't think I could be med free if I was in a different place in my life. I'd be interested in learning about alternatives to medication, too! Most doctors (At least all the ones ive had) are resistant to the idea of someone with BP going off meds. It sounds bad, and I know that they are the professionals, but I know ME best. If that makes me non compliant then so be it. They AREN'T living with BP. I am. I wish you lots of luck and hope you find the answers you seek! *hugs*
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![]() lbrown1, venusss
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#32
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Im so lost in my mind, I dont want the meds b/c I dont know the "medicated" lisa or what normal is 'supposed' to feel like, I only know what the disease feels like... sad really, I have not attempted to talk with my dr about it yet.. I plan to but lately iv been really angry and full of hatred, lots of anxiety, my mind races constantly, Im not happy I just hate everything and feel like givin up n letting the "devil inside me" win. Fighting it is to exhausting..
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#33
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The Right Combination Of Meds Takes A lot Of Dedication Committmemt And Self awareness.Also Know That Once You Do Find Those Right For You It Is Worth It.My Meds Keep Me On The Up Side Rather Than The Down Side.I Prefer This As The Depressions Make It Impossible For Me To Be Productive At Work Of At Home.I've Also Mixed States And Easily Triggered To Hypomania Of I'm Not Careful To Self Monitor Daily And As Needed And Make Adjustments Accordingly In My Lifestyle And Medications If Neccessary
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#34
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Well, I was diagnosed at 30, but I had known something was wrong since I was about 14 or 15 years old. The first time I remember having psychosis (paranoid delusions) was when I was 8 years old.
![]() I've been on Abilify at 26 years old for a month, then off due to side effects. No diagnosis though. Just a hospital psychiatrist put me on it when I was in having my son. Then Lamictle for month when I was diagnosed and off again for side effects. Then Lithium for a year. I went off it on my own because I didn't feel better and I was trembling and thirsty all the time and peeing all the time due to drinking all the time. Since then I've just been going along on my own. I know I need to get in to see a psychiatrist again, but I'm waiting. I've been like this for so long I don't know what normal is. But, I also know that I'm getting worse, but it isn't my moods that bother me. It's my loss of cognitive skills like reading, remembering, organizing, and communicating. Those are the things that really frighten me... I don't know if meds help that.
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#35
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It may be possible to go without meds, but at this point in my life, I can't. My pdoc is very supportive of minimal med use and emphasizes self-care including alternative treatments such as meditation. We are hoping to get off the anti-depressant entirely, but who knows about the mood-stabilizer. I think he would support a reduction experiment at some point in time, though I am not ready now when I am going back to university. I do still cycle though, and I want it that way. My goal is to cycle within the bounds of functionality and that's where I am. I don't know what "normal" is anyway.
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It is said an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words: "And this, too, shall pass away." How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction! ---"Address before the Wisconsin State Agricultural Society". Abraham Lincoln Online. Milwaukee, Wisconsin. September 30, 1859. |
![]() Lillyleaf
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#36
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Just curious Merlin -- why do you *want* to cycle?
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age: 23 dx: bipolar I, ADHD-C, tourette's syndrome, OCD, trichotillomania, GAD, Social Phobia, BPD, RLS current meds: depakote (divalproex sodium) 1000mg, abilify (aripiprazole) 4mg, cymbalta (duloxetine) 60mg, dexedrine (dexamphetamine) 35mg, ativan (lorazepam) 1mg prn, iron supplements past meds: ritalin, adderall, risperdal, geodon, paxil, celexa, zoloft other: individual talk therapy, CBT, group therapy, couple's therapy, hypnosis |
#37
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To interupt, why don't you want to cycle?
Oh and judging from this board and my experiences, medication doesn't really work. So why not want what you're going to have anyway? |
#38
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Quote:
![]() ![]() (Also my pdoc is really holistic and very thorough. My pdoc brings up natural solutions as almost as often as she does medical solutions. I appreciate others mightn't have that same quality of care from their pdoc ![]()
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Doing things my way, even if it isn't the usual way... |
#39
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This site being anti-med? Lawl. Been told few times that I should not be here if not on meds. Took me time to get accepted for my approach and I still do get crap for it.
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I am not Merlin, but I think for some it's more "natural" and easier to handle than being too flatlined.
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Glory to heroes!
HATEFREE CULTURE |
#40
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What an irresponsible scumbag! This makes me so mad!!
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#41
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UPDATE.. I am medicated and doing well! I love my life again and things couldnt be better. I am seeing my psychiatrist on reg basis.. seeing my therapist once a week.. living life on a schedule with structure and the difference its made in my life is amazing. I for the first time have a healthy relationship with a man that is amazing and loves me and all my issues. I never realized life could be this great. I lived so unwell for so many years i didnt even know this feeling of happiness existed. Its been about 3 months now and If things continue going this well Ill never quit taking medications.
IM LOVING LIFE, MY FAMILY, AND MYSELF
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BP 1, ANXIETY, AGORAPHOBIA, PTSD, OCD |
![]() wing
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#42
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This is my opinion based on my own experience and on what I have researched: for the successful treatment/management of BP, you need meds, therapy and a strong support network. You need all 3 of these things for the treatment to be effective. If the only reason you don't want to take meds is because of the way you feel on them ie not yourself, that is just because you are new to all of this and you haven't tried or found the right ones for you. I've been on the roller-coaster for years trying to find the right meds and doses and have tried many. Some make me feel empty and zombie-like. Some, not at all. You know when you find the right meds when you wake up one day and you just feel complete clarity and normality. Being medicated doesn't mean you have to walk around feeling wasted and not like yourself. When you are on the right ones and the right dose for you, you will know it. You will feel like yourself, your "good" self, without the neuroses/bad thoughts/feelings/behaviours/symptoms etc. So I'm probably repeating myself but I want to make you understand that if you are feeling not normal, knocked out, wasted, zombie-like etc when on your meds, then you are probably on the wrong one for you, or too high a dose. It is all trial and error. It can and does take years to find the right combo. BP is the hardest psychiatric condition to treat because finding the right balance to treat both highs and lows is so extremely difficult. You need to be assertive and proactive when dealing with professionals about your meds. You don't have to accept what they tell you as gospel. You can keep going back if you're unhappy with something you are taking or think you need a dose change etc. My doc gets annoyed but I'll go and say "not happy with this side effect, find another med for me please". He gets frustrated but he understands that I work in a very demanding job and have particular personal requirements about how I feel on meds.
Anyway, I hope this helps. Good luck, take care and keep us posted on your progress and any developments.
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Check out my Blog "Choocha Spills". It's a combo of blogs and poetry. I'm planning on writing more blogs, now I know people are actually reading it. I think the easiest way to find it is through google. Thanks. Or, hopefully this link works: http://choocha.psychcentral.net/ ![]() |
![]() venusss, wing
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#43
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DX: treatment resistant ultradian cycling/mixed state
Not an illness to fool around with. I wish I could take meds(other than Klonopin) to take me out of this living hell that I'm descending further into. |
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