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#226
Jul 09, 2013, 06:50 PM
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Finally back at home. The car ride (10 hours round trip) was absolutely brutal. The guy driving (a VP at our company... so it's not like I could b**** at him) didn't turn on the radio the WHOLE damn time. And I had to make awkward chit chat pretty much the whole time. Awful. So glad to be home.
Binging on some home shopping network.
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.age: 34 female .bipolar I .psychosis .panic/anxiety disorder Seroquel XR 100mg Labetalol for high blood pressure
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#227
Jul 09, 2013, 07:10 PM
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why does everyone here seem so happy to me today? this is the first time i posted on this thread but have been bp forever and this looks cool. ive been depressed and crying, but forced myself to go out today(for my kids) and it was okay.
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#228
Jul 09, 2013, 07:13 PM
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Today went by fast. Was working on change orders all day. I did spend a lot of the day on the phone, trying to get the med I was prescribed yesterday, lidoderm patches, only be told that my insurance wouldn't cover it for my condition.....I called the insurance company and they sent me a form for my dr to fill out, so I'm going to take it with me when I go next week for my procedure. I'm going to have a lumbar ICE procedure. It's where they stick a catheter in your back to deliver meds for 3 days. Kinda freaks me out. I'll get to walk around with a pump, oh joy. At least it's only 3 days.
I'm going to the chiropractor tomorrow, so maybe they can do something with my back. I'm tired of it hurting. |
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#229
Jul 09, 2013, 07:33 PM
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it's been long life.....
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I am lost in my own mind !  Hypo-mania and Depression are alike a Knife of Dreams ! Dx - Bipolar II  I'm not feeling well ... I got pain !!! Effie, We all got pain !!!!! 
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#230
Jul 11, 2013, 05:58 AM
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I get so moody it starts coming out of my hands and feet and I stop eating because I feel so sick I'm about to puke and I need to ****ing slow down or crash but is it really that bad or am I just making it up? God damn it's so confusing when your self-love and your self-hate are both maxed out at the same time and it's just so much that you hate yourself for being so damn full of yourself that it makes you want to curl up into a ball and just EXPLODE!
That's what I get for being a broken record and running out of meds again. Last edited by Anonymous32734; Jul 11, 2013 at 06:47 AM. |
 A Red Panda, anneo59, Moreta
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#232
Jul 11, 2013, 09:08 AM
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I had t this morning. We decided to go to every 2 weeks, cause i'm doing better. I went to the chiropractor last night and they did a physical exam and took xrays. They hooked me up to the tens machine too and that felt pretty good. I'm going back tonight and hopefully they'll do an adjustment or something.
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| Anonymous32734
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#233
Jul 11, 2013, 09:20 AM
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Today I'm still in a really big funk from yesterday's first meeting with mental health guy. Like really teary and just upset in general. Sorta want to hide from the world. And really irritable.
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
| anneo59, Anonymous32734, Anonymous45023, Anonymous53876
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#234
Jul 11, 2013, 09:37 AM
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Racing thoughts, endless soundtrack in my brain, cant concentrate, cant finish a damn thing.
I am perfectly normal in my word LOL 
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 anneo59
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#235
Jul 11, 2013, 09:41 AM
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Severly depressed this morning. It started last night. It's worse than normal, since I can barely function this morning. Just want to crawl back in bed and stay there, but not an option since I have to work. Of which, im' not being very effective.
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| anneo59, Anonymous45023
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#237
Jul 11, 2013, 03:27 PM
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Went for a walk this morning with a friend. It was WAY TOO HOT but we did it anyway. Then we vegged in her nice cold basement. haha.
Got home and I am still agitated with my mental health guy and the homework he gave me... and just get frustrated with the bathroom situation. So I tore apart my flat looking for paintbrushes and painted a pic. Keep in mind, I haven't painted something since well, grade 9 in highschool. So.. half a life ago!!! Whoa. That's scary. Like, I've used paint, and I draw things on ocassion (usually for my students) but I've never painted a picture. So be gentle! haha. I like it a lot better not in the photo. 
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"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
| anneo59
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#238
Jul 11, 2013, 08:12 PM
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Nice, Cheshire!! It would appear that we have similar painting styles.
 I was pretty crap this morning. I think it was trazodone remnants... but I'm not entirely sure. Just down, and blah, and I couldn't even SEE straight. Finally around 3 in the afternoon my day pulled out of it's eternal spiral of suck. Since then it's been... decent... so I guess I'll take that. I hate to say it, but the husband's been kind of giving me a hard time lately and it's getting me down. Like "You made our baby crazy" or "oh... did you just forget that I asked you to do this?" But I kind of just take it... don't know why... just do. Just been pissing me off in an extra special kind of way lately.
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.age: 34 female .bipolar I .psychosis .panic/anxiety disorder Seroquel XR 100mg Labetalol for high blood pressure
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#239
Jul 12, 2013, 08:34 AM
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Thanks Nessa!
Today is my first summer pay EVER! It feels like it's holiday pay... except you know, it's not. I get reduced wages all year so that I can have a steady paycheque across the two months of summer. BUT it feels like free money!!!! (And yes, it really IS my pay being stretched - someone who was on the same pay as me but was working a contract? Would have been getting more money every paycheque all year. It was a bit of a shock to my system in September when it looked like my pay had gone DOWN!) I'm celebrating by getting a tattoo! Of course, the fact that my tattoo is booked for today is actually ENTIRELY coincidental. But I find it hilarious. I will let you all know if I cry like a baby. I've got a good pain tolerance but I am SOOOOO horrible at the IDEA of pain.
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
| anneo59
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#240
Jul 12, 2013, 09:44 AM
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I am so damn tired today. We went to see pacific rim last night and it was great. We didn't get home till after 10, so that meant I didn't take my seroquel until after 10, so I didn't get to sleep until around 12. I've been going to bed around 10 lately, so those missing 2 hours are taking a toll on me.
I went to the chiropractor yesterday and she went over my xrays with me...my spine is curved to the right, there's vertebrae that are twisting, and she said it looks like I have bone spurs in my hip....  She said she would try to work with me as much as she can. So I have to go 3 times a week for 3 weeks, then 2 times a week for 4 weeks, then 1 time a week for a while, then every other week, then 1 time a month. The last time i did chiro, I ended up going every week. I should've just kept it up, then my back wouldn't be as a big a mess now. Surprisingly, my back feels decent today, but my hips are killing me. |
| anneo59, jadedbutterfly
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#241
Jul 12, 2013, 10:21 AM
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I'm feeling pretty good. Today I start my job with the Ticket to Work program. I'm a little tired, and my anxiety is slowly starting to climb. Other than that today seems like it's gonna be a good day.
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| anneo59, Anonymous32734, Anonymous53876, jadedbutterfly
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#242
Jul 12, 2013, 11:13 AM
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| Moreta
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#243
Jul 12, 2013, 11:15 AM
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hope you made it thru smoothly and doing better today!
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#244
Jul 12, 2013, 11:16 AM
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#245
Jul 12, 2013, 11:17 AM
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| Moreta
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#246
Jul 12, 2013, 11:18 AM
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#247
Jul 12, 2013, 11:20 AM
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| Anonymous32734, Anonymous53876
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#248
Jul 12, 2013, 11:26 AM
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feeling jittery... been on the depression side and last night I fell asleep without taking my meds..
. so I am feeling kinda med-sick today. Most of my meds knock me out... so I am going to have to push through today with just the klonopin.
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| anneo59, Anonymous32734, Anonymous53876
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#249
Jul 12, 2013, 12:50 PM
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 This picture WILL be taken down within a day because it's got my face and I'd rather keep me and bipolar rather separate... just a disclamer: if by SOME random chance you're from the town I live in... please be respectful! (I just needed to say that to help my own paranoia and worry over posting this) There's my tattoo! And miraculously - it didn't hurt! Had a few moments where it wasn't very comfortable, but it was totally not as painful as so many other things. At one point I actually couldn't feel the needle - not sure what part he was working on though. Feeling SUPER pumped today!
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
| anneo59, Anonymous53876
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#250
Jul 12, 2013, 01:12 PM
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Quote:
Have a great weekend.
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| A Red Panda
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| Closed Thread |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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