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#251
Jul 12, 2013, 01:12 PM
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I love it Ches ! You are a beautiful woman
__________________
Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
 A Red Panda
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 A Red Panda
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#252
Jul 12, 2013, 01:17 PM
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Very nice, Cheshire! I've wanted to get one for a while... I'd go lame and unoriginal and get a dragon I think. (Me and dragons go way back.)
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.age: 34 female .bipolar I .psychosis .panic/anxiety disorder Seroquel XR 100mg Labetalol for high blood pressure
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| A Red Panda
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| A Red Panda
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#253
Jul 12, 2013, 01:20 PM
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I was hypo most of last night...i get like that before some kind of event...like my vacation.
Most people have anticipation of an event, I get all hyped up and cant sleep, sometimes for days (I may get a couple hours here and there but usually never more than 3 at one time, and most of that three hours is spent in twilight...not getting REM sleep but definitely relaxed) So now I am on vacation...have many many things to do before I get my daughter on Sunday for the week. I cannot wait to have her live with me for the week. I miss her SO much! I love her SO much! It's her manipulative mother I can do without. Yes, I have my issues, and I was a SOB for all the porn and emotional affairs. But damn, now we are living our own lives and she has not changed one damn bit...and she CANNOT see it! All her friends think she is just fine. Personally, I dont think much of her "friends" because they just can't convinceme that she is not manipulative. But since I am the one with all the issues diagnosed, everything is MY fault. BPDII or not, it. aint. all. my. fault. PERIOD. 
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| anneo59, Anonymous32734
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#254
Jul 12, 2013, 01:49 PM
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Thanks everyone! I'm still super stoked and SO proud of myself for not even yelping! The closest I got was going "oh, I can feel that one a bit." I don't think I even said "ouch"!
And SpiritofStorm - you'll have such a great week with your daughter!!! How old is she?!
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
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#255
Jul 13, 2013, 09:31 AM
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Quote:
Dying felt like a good thing right then, but I don't think of it as a good thing now. I'd rather be alive a while longer. Big hug! 
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#256
Jul 13, 2013, 06:23 PM
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I'm ok. I have a headache though cause I didn't have enough tegretol to take this AM. I got a betta today and a 10 gallon fish tank for it. I set up the fish tank this afternoon, so I have to let it go for 24 hrs before I can put the fish in.
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| Anonymous32734
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#257
Jul 13, 2013, 06:50 PM
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Slept all day today. Should've guessed it would happen...took 300mg of Seroquel last night to sleep (which worked)...but it also caused me to sleep all day. Now I'm remembering why old pdoc and I stayed at 200mg. So I guess I'll have to tell current pdoc that I still need the Klonopin to sleep because otherwise I basically don't sleep and have a ton of anxiety at night. Ugh. I don't want to be benzo dependent, but I'd rather be that than not sleep.
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#258
Jul 13, 2013, 06:53 PM
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Love your painting and your tat Ches! I want another one...but it's gonna be quite awhile before I have the money for it.
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| A Red Panda
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| A Red Panda
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#259
Jul 13, 2013, 08:58 PM
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Moreta I've been thinking about getting a beta, are they good pets?
My week has sucked, sleeping most of the time since that's all I can do to get rid of my migraines  Had to cancel hanging out with friends. My husband doesn't get how my physical pain affects me. I wish I was healthy like him 
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In a season of suffering, we may question God's intentions. But sometimes His plans for deliverance are greater than our desire for relief -anonymous 
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#260
Jul 13, 2013, 09:03 PM
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There's a lot of fireworks going on in my neighborhood right now. They must have missed the memo that the 4th was last weekend.
Right now.. crushing a bottle of new wine and watching the musical Chicago. This is living right here.
__________________
.age: 34 female .bipolar I .psychosis .panic/anxiety disorder Seroquel XR 100mg Labetalol for high blood pressure
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#261
Jul 13, 2013, 09:09 PM
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"Cell Block Tango" is one of my favourites songs from in musicals. I love it!
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
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#262
Jul 13, 2013, 09:17 PM
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Seriously JUST played that one! Love it!!!
Right up there with Don't Dream it, Be it from Rocky Horror Picture Show.
__________________
.age: 34 female .bipolar I .psychosis .panic/anxiety disorder Seroquel XR 100mg Labetalol for high blood pressure
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#263
Jul 13, 2013, 09:29 PM
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lol. I'm now craving musicals. THANKS NESSA. yesterday I was singing along with Dr Horrible's Sing Along Blog. haha.
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
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#264
Jul 13, 2013, 09:36 PM
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Mission... accomplished...
Might I also recommend Newsies?! its a classic.
__________________
.age: 34 female .bipolar I .psychosis .panic/anxiety disorder Seroquel XR 100mg Labetalol for high blood pressure
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#265
Jul 13, 2013, 09:37 PM
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Been kinda down all day. Lots of things to resolve in my head.
The soundtrack of my past life keeps playing over and over and over. |
| A Red Panda, Anonymous32734, kindachaotic, Nessa213, wing
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| wing
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#266
Jul 13, 2013, 10:11 PM
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Quote:
Gah! Spirit: I'm sorry that you're having a down day! Mine has been rather up and down. I've been up and bouncy most of the day, but have randomly started crying a few times too. Go go emotions
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
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#267
Jul 14, 2013, 07:55 AM
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Quote:
I was crying and then not and then crying...yeah, randomly.....alll morning. Geeze I hate it when it gets like that, but at the same time, its when I make my greatest breakthru's and discoveries about my depression. Go figure! |
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#268
Jul 14, 2013, 07:56 AM
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Today is better than yesterday.
I am still dealing with some downs and those downs were further complicated by an ex who loves to kick me when I am down. |
| Anonymous32734
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#269
Jul 14, 2013, 08:47 AM
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Exes are stupid. That's the most mature response I can give on that one, haha.
I've been pretty up and down too - but I know right now I'm getting triggered somewhat by doing the homework Mental Health Guy gave me. And I've been reading different articles and threads which, while useful, tend to make me cry. But then I've also just been randomly crying over other things too. Lol.
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
| Anonymous32734
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#270
Jul 14, 2013, 09:24 AM
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today started out rough but it had nothing to do with bipolar. Just me being paranoid and over sensitive.
__________________
Bipolar 2 (in remission), anorexia (in remission), and trichotillomania, also have conversion disorder that seems to be rearing its ugly head again. 100mg Lamictal |
| Anonymous32734
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#271
Jul 14, 2013, 08:19 PM
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Well. I started today out in a pretty good mood.
Then I went about doing work for Mental Health Guy. I've been working on it a bit every day. Well. Today, in prepartion for having troubles expressing myself, I printed off some articles I've read online lately. And then I went through them highlighting things. Even though I'd already read the articles, it was still upsetting to reread them and I was randomly crying because it's embarassing to think of having to talk about any of it, and frustrated because it still isn't dealt with and I"ve been dealing with it my whole life. Then had an argument with a guy who's into me, but I've been trying to be friends. It was so stupid, but it really made things pretty horrible for me for a little bit and I coudln't stop crying. And now I am a bit miserable because I sorta deleted him from my phone completely.
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
| Anonymous32734
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#272
Jul 14, 2013, 09:32 PM
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Double-posting.... dunno where to post this but it's driving me NUTS and I need to say it SOMEWHERE.
For the past hour or two it keeps feeling like there are little bugs on different parts of me body. I'll feel them crawling and then there's nothing there. Just like one little bug at a time. It is DRIVING ME NUTS. Clearly it is time to shave my legs. And maybe wear my hair up in a bun tomorrow. Keep things from irritating me as much as possible. Am probably just thinking subconsciously a lot about when my tattoo will get itchy. Who knows. This is SERIOUSLY annoying.
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
| Anonymous32734, Anonymous45023
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#273
Jul 14, 2013, 09:38 PM
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I don't want to say that the lamictal is what it is, but I'll just say that when I was at... I think it was 25 or 50mg I had that exact same experience! It did eventually go away once my dosage was increased.
__________________
.age: 34 female .bipolar I .psychosis .panic/anxiety disorder Seroquel XR 100mg Labetalol for high blood pressure
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#274
Jul 14, 2013, 11:06 PM
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Today was really rough because I had to handle a huge disappointment/let down (one of my best friends for life was visiting NY from PA and he was going to come down and see me, but something came up with another friend so he wasn't able to)...and I had been looking forward to seeing him for about 2 weeks since I haven't seen him since November and we're both usually so busy we rarely get a chance to talk. And then there was stuff with my mom...but I took a run and it cleared my head a lot and I feel more grounded now, so that's good.
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| Anonymous32734
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#275
Jul 15, 2013, 12:46 AM
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a few days ago my rapid cycle bipolar was going crazy I was having a day where for no apparent reason I would feel irritable or depressed.
even though I have a minor case of bipolar it hits me hard when it does come around. Cause I literally get manic depressive thoughts in a whole day rapidly. and it really sucks, cause it comes out for no reason...and makes life an emotional hell for me for a day or so.
__________________
Dx:OCD, AD/HD-C and ADD kinda both, General Anxiety Disorder, Separation Anxiety Disorder,Abandonment Anxiety, Cycothymic disorder, or mixed bipolar, Border Line Personality Disorder,Histonic Personality Disorder, Dependent Personality disorder, eating disorder ]Rx:Lamotrigine 25mg twice a day for my mood stablizer as well as I am on Escitalopram 10mg 1 daily, Buspirone 3 times daily 10mgs VT Student, CNA student, working HHA  for my father I think of you everyday
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| Anonymous32734, Anonymous53876
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| Closed Thread |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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