My meds scare me

I am scared of my medications that is my OCD hates them but also I am scared. I am scared of long term side effects. I am scared they will somehow hurt me. everything about them scares me. I know they are supposed to help me but they really frighten me.

I have the same problem. Only last night I was convincing myself I had tardive dyskinesia (when I clearly don't). Don't really have advice, just empathy. OCD sucks.

when I get rx (especially my kids when they were young) and I have a doubt I ask my pharmaist ... "would you give this to your family" ... I have had her say no before ...

I think it's important for all us to be aware of medication side effects and to understand how medications affect us in the long term. At the same time, it's also important not to overanalyze everything and psych yourself out.

You don't want to be so engrossed in your medication "research" that you envisage the worst possible scenarios and begin trying to "read between the lines", or so to speak. There is nothing to read the lines between.

A better thing to do is ask yourself: what am I really afraid of? You need to address your fears and rationalize them. I'll help you out :

"I am scared they will somehow hurt me." -- Why is this? Is this because you've read about other people getting "hurt" by medications? But why not look at the positive outcomes people have reported. And how likely are these side effects of doom really?

"everything about them scares me." -- Why? That's a very broad statement. Think about what leads you to say that "everything" scares you? Surely you aren't scared of everything. I'm betting you're scared of specific things.

"I know they are supposed to help me but they really frighten me" -- Why? What about them frightens you? Side effects? Is this linked to the first question? How likely will these medications help you vs how likely will they hurt you?

Hopefully that helps! Not intended to be bullying at all. Just trying to help you to rationalize things.

I have been on meds 40+ years starting w thorazine and an maoi in 1970. Haven't had any long term side effects yet.. no I m not on those particular drugs now but have been through all of the old antipsychotics and the new ones throughout the years. I m a senior now. If it hasn't damaged me now I have no fear about the next 10 or 20 or so years. Again people are different in how they react to meds but just because you are on meds doesn't automatically mean that eventually you will be damaged by them. Sometimes after a long time you may develop a side effect and then the meds need changed. But you learn your bodies signals and you work closely with your pdoc if you have unreasonable side effects until you get on a combo that works or works again. Yes some people can be adversely affected but that isn't a 100 percent given for every person.

(((Hugs)))
It's interesting the timing that you posted this, because I've been thinking and feeling this way too lately. Lately, I've been having some health issues, and I can't help but wonder if my meds are causing this. I am afraid to stay on a high doses of certain meds and read too much about the risks of AP's, especially (especially since my dose has increased a lot over a short time frame). This fear is especially bad, given that I have anxiety issues already!!

I plan to keep record of any questions I have for my pdoc for next time I go. Definitely reach out to your pdoc about any concerns on a regular basis, if that helps you put your mind to rest. Writing down specifics could be helpful. It is completely normal to have such concerns about being on psych meds though.

To be 'Dr Phil', is that working for you?

where you asking me?

thanks everyone i guess i am scared that they will cause other health problems it is hard to explain what my head is thinking about this issue.

Not sure if this is aimed towards me since I was the last poster before that, but if so, nothing is working for me, aside from recently talking to my pdoc about a few concerns that have put my mind at rest.....and yes, in my case, it did help me with certain concerns.

I really wish I could be an expert in this area. Never claimed to be, but if it came off that way to anybody, sorry. My intention was just sharing the little bit that has actually been helpful to me. Just meant to share I can relate to that fear and that I've benefited personally from talking to my pdoc about certain things. If any of this came out wrong, disregard anything I have to say whatsoever. My intentions were good.

That's about it though. I'm also open to any suggestions as far as how to help with anxiety related to this issue. Carry on.

It's normal to feel that way. These are strong drugs and side effects are likely. I'm on one med that requires frequent (weekly for 6 months, every other week for 6 months, monthly until off it) labs because it can mess up blood counts and potentially kill you (small chance but enough they watch it. You have to fail a lot of other meds to go on it so don't worry you'll be on that one anytime soon.

I remember calling a friend to be on the phone with me when I took my first lithium because it felt like my first commitment to these high power meds and it was scary. Now I don't think of it much, except for keeping track of my blood draws and any side effects that I need to ask about occasionally.

Right now these are the drugs we have. Most side effects are more annoying than anything. It is worth it to feel better, to not be paranoid and hallucinating. Other drugs are always coming out; there are so many more drugs approved for bipolar than there were when I was diagnosed 15 years ago.

It helps to keep a list of any side effects you are potentially feeling and bring that to pdoc appointments, at least while you are adjusting to everything. Soon you'll be used to many side effects and others will go away.

It does get easier. I just glad you finally got treatment. You deserve to feel better.

it just freaks me out i wish i didnt have to take meds at all.

So do I. (I mean I wish you didn't).

Honestly I no longer wish I didn't because I know how much difference mine make. About 2.5 years ago my main med stopped working and I found out what life is like without it. I wouldn't go through that again for anything (and I did have some meds working at least a little).

For me it got a lot easier as it became my routine. Just having to remember to take meds and adjusting to that was tough and now it's just something I do for a few seconds every day and it makes such a difference in how I feel.

it is also daunting to think this could be the rest of my life. i hate meds.

Hopefully you'll be able to learn to be glad for them. A lot of us struggle really hard with the need for them and that they are long-term. It makes things tough. But there are worse things; at least meds can help us.

But totally understand what you are saying. I've been on meds for depression then bipolar for 19 years and I still wish I could skip them even just sometimes. (Although tonight I'll get a reminder why I take them; I ran out of my AP and probably will have a rough night sleeping. I NEVER do this so I'm pretty mad at myself and will pay for it for a few days).

I guess taking it one day at a time might help? Looking ahead a lifetime is a long, long time.

I've been on meds for depression for over 20 years and with my diagnosis just changed to Bipolar I'm going through a Pristiq withdrawal and have been started on Lithium at the end of January.

My thyroid function is already showing signs of being in the troubled range and I have to go back in 2 weeks to see my dr. This is when it gets to me, a new med and already causing problems I know it may sound vain but almost 2 weeks ago I noticed my hair was starting to go funny, getting really dry and yucky. I now know why and it just is really like the straw that broke the camels back, because there are so many other things that are on the list that can go wrong.

lavenderbrat, it's actually good you noticed the hair thing. For one thing it's a warning about thyroid so you can get on thyroid meds if you need them. Also you can help your hair. Selenium and biotin supplements can help and a shampoo called Nioxin for thinning hair if that's also going on can also make a huge difference. I didn't notice the hair thing until it had gone on long enough that I had a lot of icky brittle hair with some balding spots and it took a long time to fix.

i am on lithium this does not ease my mind :/

Well, thyroid problems are pretty common with lithium, usually after being on it for some time (years). But thyroid is easily treated, albeit with another pill. Or you can stop it to see if the thyroid improves but I think most people just take the thyroid med. It's a no-side effect, easy pill.

The hair thing usually happens gradually and can be helped as I noted above. For me it got really bad because I had toxicity for a prolonged period. That was because I didn't get my labs done when they were due and then it took a while to figure out what was going on. If I'd had that level done and the toxicity caught sooner I'd have been in better shape. (The hair thing is sometimes related to thyroid and was for me.) I also was on another med that can affect hair growth.

Getting your labs done on time, every time they are due, is really important with the lithium. And calling and asking for labs if something doesn't feel right is important too.

Sorry to scare you.

thats ok yeah i plan to get check regularly

I'm in healthcare, and I feel the same way. I mean, I don't hate meds, because I see every day in my job that they help people, but I hate that I have to be on them.

The biggest issue I see is when people get on the internet and start researching. I mean, I'm not immune to it; I do it as well! However, I know what sites have the peer-reviewed, evidence-based information and which ones are probably giving you fear-mongering information from people wearing tin foil hats Kidding...mostly. I mean, there is so much out there, and the info spans the whole range. I think it's just a good rule of thumb to take internet information with a grain of salt, and if you read something which frightens you, take that information to your doctor or pharmacist and investigate further. I'm not saying that meds aren't scary, or that there aren't scary side effects, I'm just saying that some information on the internet makes some things sound a lot worse than they are, and can really needlessly intensify your fears.