The end of my dream

I decided I wanted to be an occupational therapist the summer after my freshman year of college (1995). I was accepted and fought my way through during the time my bipolar was really taking off (but before I knew it). I started working at my first job in Jan. 2001 and my last day of work was Aug. 6, 2011. I had no idea that was going to be the last day; I was going to be off for a minor gyn surgery later that month and wound up being taken off work earlier so I could be on pain meds until surgery. After surgery I had problems caused by meds and problems caused by hormones from my Mirena IUD and it made my bipolar worse. I tried to go back to work but never even saw a patient before work and I agreed I wasn't ready.

Since then I've maintained my license in a holding state that you can only do for so long. This year is the end of that time and since I can't meet the requirements to re-establish it it is going to expire. That happens June 30.

I worked so hard and dreamed of being an OT for years. I remember in school when I'd get frustrated I'd sit and write "Beyond the Rainbow, OTR/L" just to feel better and remind me to stick to my goals. And now that goal is over.

I can't believe it is over.

I'm sorry you are struggling. I have some idea how that feels. I worked my tail off to get my CPA license. When I could no longer work I had to put it in inactive status. I have to renew it every two years and seeing the inactive status really bothers me. I don't think it will ever be back in active status and that upsets me. I hope you process this loss and start feeling better. Best wishes.

What a loss!
My heart goes out to you.

(((((( BeyondtheRainbow ))))))


WC

Hello
I am also working in the health care field getting a masters for SLP. Can you contact your state licensing to see if there is anything you can do to get an extension? Can OT do online CEU?

I've used up all my extension. Online CEUs are possible but I need more than CEUs because it has been more than 5 years since I did a treatment. At their discretion I would need to do supervised hours (which I'm not well enough to do) or re-take my board exam (no way could I pass that again 16 years later; I know nothing about peds at this point and I have memory issues that would make me struggle with the areas I do know). And even if I did everything required and renewed the license realistically there is little chance I'll use it.

I had to really consider this because I'm afraid that with the threatened cuts to SSDI or potentially to Medicare that I might need to work and I can't imagine doing anything else. But I'm not capable of working no matter what happens at this point and I need to accept that. If something happens and I can work I have the ability to go through a reinstatement process then.

That's good that you can go through a reinstatement process when you get back on your feet.

I'm not sure if OT is able to do this, but SLPs cans do teletherapy where the therapy Iis delivered online. I just know how much you have to work at getting these licenses so it's a shame to have to let it go.

It's really just something that is there to dream about. I don't have the clinical skills to go back and couldn't demonstrate that or pass my boards again. I'm really done for good. And since the only way that I'm doing relatively well is that I'm on clozaril and need at least 12, sometimes 14, hours of sleep per night on that, this also seals my fate. I'm ok with it, I've known for a long time. But it's still sad to be at this week.

If teletherapy has become an option it has been in the last 5 years. Which is possible but I've not read anything about it. Much of what we do is hands on though. It doesn't really matter; I don't have the clinical skills to work and my bipolar is too severe to do so even if it hadn't been 6 years since I saw a patient. I know that, I just wish it were different.

I'm so sorry about this. I'm a nurse whose license is still active but I won't be able to renew it the next time because I won't have practiced in five years. I lost my career to bipolar in 2014 and haven't worked at all since. I have memory issues that make it difficult if not impossible to learn another job, and nursing is so stressful that I know I can never do it again. I'm on SSDI and am terrified of the potential for cuts...I just don't think I'm capable of working. So I feel for you, hun.

Oh... I'm so sorry for you. �� I know that has to be so hard. You know your worth is found in more than your abilities and that you are loved beyond your ability to work. What a help you have been to me in the past. I wish I could make you feel better. I hope that you will quickly accept this and that it doesn't make you too downhearted. You should be proud of yourself for what you were able to accomplish. All my love to you sweet lady.

I want to believe I could work if the cuts happen. Realistically it isn't going to happen, no matter what job I tried to do. Memory problems, noise tolerance problems, asthma that reacts to environmental triggers (can't work near cleaners nor in dirty places), etc. I just tell myself I could work because I am terrified what losing that money would do.

Sending heartfelt hugs, you offer so much here I want to offer any support I can. We are all here for you anytime.

I know this is difficult for you. It's hard saying goodbye to something you worked so hard for and enjoyed. I'm pretty sure you were an amazing OT. I know it's not the same, but you've been extremely helpful here. You've helped many of us through problems and I am extremely grateful for that.

I hope this thread has given you some comfort that you are not alone. I've gone through the same thing with a teaching certificate. It is heartbreaking. I think it's totally appropriate and "normal" to grieve this loss.

The license for my career is up next year, I will not renew either.

I'm so sorry.

Hugs to everyone that BP has affected their career paths

Thanks to everyone for so much support. This is happening at a bad time; my therapist is on vacation and this snuck up on me. I knew it was coming but didn't realize it was this week.I have things I am worrying about with my therapist and I think those things took over and I forgot to be sad. Now I'm sad. But I've had years to prepare for this so I'll be ok. I just really wish my therapist were around or that I could get some extra time next week so I can get through this and the other thing. But I'll just have to deal.

I appreciate you all so much.

I lost my security clearance when I was accepted for LTD. That's a real bear to get back, and I don't even know if I could given the BP diagnosis. Plus my job was so specialized I don't know if there's even an opening.

I'm scared of the SSDI/Medicare thing as well, not just for myself but for others.

I'm sorry you lost your licence

Re-reading and sending an extra hug your way.

(((((( BeyondtheRainbow ))))))


WC

I'm sorry about your license. I'm about to become licensed as a school psychologist and I can relate to pushing through bipolar to reach my goals. I know it is a serious struggle. Just know you did what was best for you and your needs.