[Blueberrybook]

A bit better. Took 25 mg Seroquel & lay down with lavender & lemon oils infusing. (I am prescribed the low dose Seroques (25-50 mg) for very bad anxiety and panic). Knocked me out. Usually that low a dose of Seroquel does not. Thankfully, I set a timer. I was out for over 2 hours, missed the home phone ringing, even a person leaving a voicemail on our answering machine. The answering machine is in the bedroom and extremely loud.

A bit tired and dazed now. Not panicky. Did take the Protonix before I lay down; I hate that I forget it so much. I don't think even a timer on my phone would remind me. I have lots of reminder notes going off that time, from appointments, to time to wake my daughter up, time to take the meat out of the freezer...etc.

[wildflowerchild25]

I had a good day today. Except I caught my students toe in her shoe and didn’t noticed. I felt so bad when the PT told me. She had that shoe for like three hours. I just have to pay better attention. It’s always little things like that that make me feel inadequate. But I do the best I can.

I have my date in 40 minutes! I’ve been talking to the guy all week and I think we will have a good time. He’s not as sexually aggressive as the last guy so that’s good. And he’s not creepy. I’m not going out with the other guy, he proved himself to be a creep. We were talking for like a half hour and then all of a sudden he starts talking about the vibrations of his car and how it’s “making [his] manhood all tingly and happy” like seriously? What makes him think that was a good idea? I told him it was inappropriate and that I didn’t want to continue the conversation. Then I blocked him. **** that.

I’m a little nervous for my date. I’m afraid he will be turned off my my weight. Plus I am all broken out again assuming from my new birth control. I don’t know how to do makeup so I don’t have any concealer. Oh well. If he doesn’t like a real woman I don’t wanna date him anyway.

[Wild Coyote]

Lots of snow for mid-November. Approx. 8 inches.
Very gray and cold. Windy, snowy.

Pdoc/T cancelled due to traveling difficulties.

In a lot of pain all night and today. Resting some. It's almost time to get dinner.

Love to All!

WC

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

I had a good day today. Except I caught my students toe in her shoe and didn’t noticed. I felt so bad when the PT told me. She had that shoe for like three hours. I just have to pay better attention. It’s always little things like that that make me feel inadequate. But I do the best I can.

I have my date in 40 minutes! I’ve been talking to the guy all week and I think we will have a good time. He’s not as sexually aggressive as the last guy so that’s good. And he’s not creepy. I’m not going out with the other guy, he proved himself to be a creep. We were talking for like a half hour and then all of a sudden he starts talking about the vibrations of his car and how it’s “making [his] manhood all tingly and happy” like seriously? What makes him think that was a good idea? I told him it was inappropriate and that I didn’t want to continue the conversation. Then I blocked him. **** that.

I’m a little nervous for my date. I’m afraid he will be turned off my my weight. Plus I am all broken out again assuming from my new birth control. I don’t know how to do makeup so I don’t have any concealer. Oh well. If he doesn’t like a real woman I don’t wanna date him anyway.

I hope you have a good time on your date.


WC

[TheSeaCat]

Last night was rather rough, dad and I had a huge fight over something stupid, he thinks my doctor doesn't know what he is doing since I am still having anxiety.

Dad I have anxiety disorder it's a lot more than simple anxiety. I am handling my life the way I want too. He thinks my job is too stressful and that I should probably consider IP since my Buspar still makes me have moments of anxiety. That is not something you go impatient for. I am not slipping, I am the best I have been since April. I am working again. I am happy despite all the crap that keeps being dumped on me. IP for anxiety, i'm not suicidal, homicidal, I can properly take care of myself, and I am not having a psychotic break. I haven't even had a panic attack since early October.

I'm stable you *****. I think he is still bitter about the breakup. He's mad that I won't let him tag along to the Cardiologist. Well yeah you have railroaded all of my doctors what is going to be different this time.

Why do you think I see someone different than who you see, it's because she willingly gives you what you want. I want a doctor that is actually up to date on modern medicine and someone who graduated this Millennium.

I can't keep being everyone's emotional punching bag. I wasn't about to be the ex's mother and I am sick of father unloading all his crap onto me. Not to mention I just don't trust him with my trust issues and while he says he's supportive, I don't see the support.

Okay off the soap box of parental discontent. Work was great today, I'm finding my grove again. My boss respected my decision from yesterday about the angry patient.

The PA and I have plans to see Fantastic Beasts sometime tomorrow and do lunch before or after.

The Cardiologist office called to remind me about my appointment Monday, I wish the anxiety would stop coming up with conditions.

Now to see the therapist for the last time this week, remind me to never do four sessions in a week ever again. Twice will be enough next week.

Hugs to everyone

Sorry for the long post, just annoyed today.

[yellow_fleurs]

TheSeaCat, good job on sticking up for your boundaries. It's something I am working on, too. You shouldn't have to be anyone's emotional punching bag. Have fun at the movie!

[Blueberrybook]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

I had a good day today. Except I caught my students toe in her shoe and didn’t noticed. I felt so bad when the PT told me. She had that shoe for like three hours. I just have to pay better attention. It’s always little things like that that make me feel inadequate. But I do the best I can.

I have my date in 40 minutes! I’ve been talking to the guy all week and I think we will have a good time. He’s not as sexually aggressive as the last guy so that’s good. And he’s not creepy. I’m not going out with the other guy, he proved himself to be a creep. We were talking for like a half hour and then all of a sudden he starts talking about the vibrations of his car and how it’s “making [his] manhood all tingly and happy” like seriously? What makes him think that was a good idea? I told him it was inappropriate and that I didn’t want to continue the conversation. Then I blocked him. **** that.

I’m a little nervous for my date. I’m afraid he will be turned off my my weight. Plus I am all broken out again assuming from my new birth control. I don’t know how to do makeup so I don’t have any concealer. Oh well. If he doesn’t like a real woman I don’t wanna date him anyway.

I hope you have fun on your date!

[giddykitty]

I read a lot of these entries, but by the time I get to the end I don't know what more to say. I like chatting with folks, but I can't keep up. Well anyway.

Next week I'm supposed to see the eye doctor, followup glaucoma check. I think it's bogus and just a way for them to make money, (I'm young and have no history of poor testing) but I called in to check with them just to be sure. I got the answering machine. *sigh So I have to wait and see if they call back. I'll probably end up canceling next Monday if I can get a person on the line. I know glaucoma is serious but I think they overscreen because insurance companies can get them money. Right?

[Moose72]

Its been a long day. Talking to a couple friends has helped. Sorry im just not up to replyiingto all tonight.

[Unrigged64072835]

Hey, popping in...

Good thing we went camping three weeks ago, because it’s been freezing and loads of heavy ice here this week. Not all the trees have lost their leaves and a lot of those lost some heavy branches.

I bought new pajamas recently, and I seriously feel some hibernation about to happen. Just have no motivation for anything but sleep. I’m sure my pnurse would put me back on Viibryd but not this season. Unless I need to leave the house I’m in my PJs.

I took down my poetry site because I haven’t done anything with it. That has run its course for now. We’ll save the money for more camping next year because it’ll be all we can do.

Just really tired now, sorry. Didn’t sleep well. Old high school friends popped up on FB and stirred up some emotional crap. I’m not that person now and I’m done with it. Time for something different.

Went back to old T. Did everything with trauma T and other T was just not working out. I like him anyhow.

Love and hugs to everyone.

[Blueberrybook]

Hard day for a lot of us, sounds like

[Guiness187055]

MURPHY'S LAW Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.....FML

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Fharraige

Hey, popping in...

Good thing we went camping three weeks ago, because it’s been freezing and loads of heavy ice here this week. Not all the trees have lost their leaves and a lot of those lost some heavy branches.

I bought new pajamas recently, and I seriously feel some hibernation about to happen. Just have no motivation for anything but sleep. I’m sure my pnurse would put me back on Viibryd but not this season. Unless I need to leave the house I’m in my PJs.

I took down my poetry site because I haven’t done anything with it. That has run its course for now. We’ll save the money for more camping next year because it’ll be all we can do.

Just really tired now, sorry. Didn’t sleep well. Old high school friends popped up on FB and stirred up some emotional crap. I’m not that person now and I’m done with it. Time for something different.

Went back to old T. Did everything with trauma T and other T was just not working out. I like him anyhow.

Love and hugs to everyone.

It's wonderful to have you posting! I have been wondering how you are doing! I like PJs, too!


WC

[TheSeaCat]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

I had a good day today. Except I caught my students toe in her shoe and didn’t noticed. I felt so bad when the PT told me. She had that shoe for like three hours. I just have to pay better attention. It’s always little things like that that make me feel inadequate. But I do the best I can.

I have my date in 40 minutes! I’ve been talking to the guy all week and I think we will have a good time. He’s not as sexually aggressive as the last guy so that’s good. And he’s not creepy. I’m not going out with the other guy, he proved himself to be a creep. We were talking for like a half hour and then all of a sudden he starts talking about the vibrations of his car and how it’s “making [his] manhood all tingly and happy” like seriously? What makes him think that was a good idea? I told him it was inappropriate and that I didn’t want to continue the conversation. Then I blocked him. **** that.

I’m a little nervous for my date. I’m afraid he will be turned off my my weight. Plus I am all broken out again assuming from my new birth control. I don’t know how to do makeup so I don’t have any concealer. Oh well. If he doesn’t like a real woman I don’t wanna date him anyway.

Good luck with the date let us know how it goes. That other guy sounds like creepazoid.

[TheSeaCat]

Therapy went well, I'm glad it's over for the week. On the plus side I made a bit of a breakthrough. My father apologized for last night's argument and that he is proud of me. I personally think he is full of shyt; but whatever he still isn't coming no matter how much he begs. He'll tell Cardiologist it's anxiety even though I know it's not, my primary doc and this sweet PA agree it's to high to be anxiety.

I'm hanging out at Auntie's house catching up on the Grey's Anatomy and Station 19 I missed yesterday.

[wildflowerchild25]

My date was great! The guy is really cute and seems very nice and genuine. We talked for two hours. I didn’t want to leave!

It’s nice to be out with someone nice.

Fhairrage! Good to see you! New jammies, yeah! My jammies are currently in the dryer. Better believe I'll be popping those on fresh out of there! Mmmmm. (Picked up a cuddly blanket today too. I will be SO hunkered down! ) I hope you get a nice peaceful night of sleep tonight.

[Wander]

What is up with these wild mood swings ... oh yeh, I have bipolar. Still, one would think all the ECT would be having an effect by now, but no, I am all over the map. This last week I was high as a kite for a week then came crashing down into suicidal depression the day before my maintenance ECT on Thursday. Now it's Saturday and I am still low but thankfully not as low. It is morning and I really hope that my mood picks up as my sister is having her 45th Birthday party tonight with over 100 people, 30 of which are children, and I am the chief photographer. It should be fun if I can get my head out of the darkness.

[~Christina]

I just don’t like “ me” today.

Snappy and twitchy manic miserable. Weather was better today , thankfully.

Hugs to those needing one

[Daonnachd]

I was on my way to ECT when my brother phoned. Our mother had died. So I turned around and we went to be with my siblings. It was a rough week.

[TheSeaCat]

Originally Posted by Daonnachd

I was on my way to ECT when my brother phoned. Our mother had died. So I turned around and we went to be with my siblings. It was a rough week.

I am so so sorry, all the hugs.

[Sunflower123]

Originally Posted by Daonnachd

I was on my way to ECT when my brother phoned. Our mother had died. So I turned around and we went to be with my siblings. It was a rough week.

I am so sorry for the loss of your mother and father so close together. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. Please take good care of you. You’ve been through a really tough time

[CrT0811]

Made it to Daughter’s but staying in a hotel because the beds are firmer here. A few years ago, the hubby was struck by a truck when he had stopped to help someone broken down on the highway. The guy he stopped to help had both his ankles amputated by his car as the speeding truck ran off the road and hit them. The hubby was wearing his riding boots so he broke both ankles a tibia and shattered his hip and had a chunk of metal go thru both his legs. The other guy died on the scene. This was in ‘15. The hubs recovered and only has a slight limp when he’s tired but cannot handle any really soft beds.

Anyway...we got here fine and I even had enough energy and Peopleing left in me to help my daughter get the birthday cake for the grand’s fifth birthday party tomorrow then the hubby and I watched the little dude while they had an impromptu movie date night.

I don’t know how to explain the joy that little mini man brings into my heart. Nothing, and I mean nothing...will ever feel as strong as my love for him. It’s bizarre and quite befuddling. I thought there was no way I could love any fiercer than I love my children and my hubby...but from the second my daughter put that tiny, tot in my arms I knew I would die a thousand horrific, painful deaths if I had to in order to keep that 9 pound, wriggling bundle of flesh safe and the love only grows stronger every single day. I am in my happy place. I hope everyone has a marvelous weekend...and, I saw a shooting star, so yeah...come and grab some of this good karmic energy and pass it on down!

[Nammu]

Originally Posted by Daonnachd

I was on my way to ECT when my brother phoned. Our mother had died. So I turned around and we went to be with my siblings. It was a rough week.

Ah, so sorry the loss of your parents.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Daonnachd

I was on my way to ECT when my brother phoned. Our mother had died. So I turned around and we went to be with my siblings. It was a rough week.

My heart goes out to you.
Deepest sympathies.
Love and Prayers.

WC