Last thread has reached over 100 pages so here is a brand new one

[Wild Coyote]

Scatterbrained, nice to have you posting!

Acceptance, I have found, can help.
I hope you have a good week.

WC

[Wild Coyote]

BirdDancer,
I hope you feel better soon!

WC

[Wild Coyote]

A recent Lamictal increase has me a bit tired today.

It's going to be a mellow day!

I hope everyone is having a peaceful Sunday in preparation for the upcoming week.

Love to All!

WC

Lately, I've been doing a poor job of coping with stress. I'm still mad at the guy at my job who steals my work and then tells his boss and my boss that I didn't do anything. He also STILL accuses me of doing my work "incorrectly" when I told him 3 or 4 times that I don't have time to help him, and that I'm NOT finished with my work. He keeps doing it. Fortunately, my boss doesn't believe his stories because there's no way I could have done my work "incorrectly" if I allegedly "didn't do anything."

Anyway, this guy's b_llshit is stressing me out. I know my boss is taking care of it, but I'm still pissed at this guy for what he's been doing. Who knows what else he's said behind my back.

I feel like I've been eating normally for the most part, but the dr office says I've lost weight. I think stress just affects my metabolism or something. I'm not sure. But I'm also worn out and sleeping so much. I slept 10 hours last night and 12 the prior.

I can't take it anymore. And on top of that, I'm convinced my internet history is being browsed by my cable company and who knows what else. I haven't done anything illegal, but I think they see things like this website, which is embarrassing to me because then they'll discover my diagnoses. They didn't say they were browsing it and they've never done anything to me or said anything, but I think they are browsing it. I think they have the legal right to watch me, since they're selling me their service. I think they do it for fun. They've already watched my uncle's internet history and forced him to change his personal internet connection to a business connection because he was downloading too much stuff. Now I'm scared they're watching me and reporting me to the police over "suspicious activity" even though I believe I've done nothing wrong and I know I haven't done anything illegal. But you know, maybe a pop-up ad did something to me and now I'm going to be reported.

I'm frustrated with everything. And the Indian people across the hallway are blasting Bollywood music just to piss everyone off, I think. All they do is be loud and let their kids rollerblade down the hallway, as I've shown in my pictures in the past. They just don't stop.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Lavender.

Last thread has reached over 100 pages so here is a brand new one

Thank you Lavender!
I appreciate all you do!

WC

[Nammu]

Indeed, thanks lavender for your timely creations.

Eh, I'm coasting.

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

BirdDancer,
I hope you feel better soon!

WC

Thanks, Wild Coyote! And I hope you do enjoy a mellow day. Hopefully you'll soon adjust to your new medication dose. Lamictal actually has a history of becoming activating for me. Maybe it will shift gears soon for you.

Would you believe it! I figured out why I couldn't sleep last night. I blamed triggers, but I found this morning that I forgot to take my evening meds last night. Hubby asked mr about them late last night and I was so certain that I took them that I wouldn't even check. Plus, I've been delinquent about filling my pill boxes lately, but just one hour ago I see Saturday's box full. I guess I had gathered them to take them after dinner and put just Saturday in the box. The gathering itself convinced me that I took them, but I didn't. So all I took was the 50 mg "extra" Seroquel at 5 am. Luckily I did take my morning meds this morning. Time to finally fill the pill boxes!

bluebicycle, workmate wars are the worst! Consider expressing your concern about this to your boss. Maybe not in an angry or critical way, but as an expression of concern for your work being misrepresented. Just a thought.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

Lately, I've been doing a poor job of coping with stress. I'm still mad at the guy at my job who steals my work and then tells his boss and my boss that I didn't do anything. He also STILL accuses me of doing my work "incorrectly" when I told him 3 or 4 times that I don't have time to help him, and that I'm NOT finished with my work. He keeps doing it. Fortunately, my boss doesn't believe his stories because there's no way I could have done my work "incorrectly" if I allegedly "didn't do anything."

Anyway, this guy's b_llshit is stressing me out. I know my boss is taking care of it, but I'm still pissed at this guy for what he's been doing. Who knows what else he's said behind my back.

I feel like I've been eating normally for the most part, but the dr office says I've lost weight. I think stress just affects my metabolism or something. I'm not sure. But I'm also worn out and sleeping so much. I slept 10 hours last night and 12 the prior.

I can't take it anymore. And on top of that, I'm convinced my internet history is being browsed by my cable company and who knows what else. I haven't done anything illegal, but I think they see things like this website, which is embarrassing to me because then they'll discover my diagnoses. They didn't say they were browsing it and they've never done anything to me or said anything, but I think they are browsing it. I think they have the legal right to watch me, since they're selling me their service. I think they do it for fun. They've already watched my uncle's internet history and forced him to change his personal internet connection to a business connection because he was downloading too much stuff. Now I'm scared they're watching me and reporting me to the police over "suspicious activity" even though I believe I've done nothing wrong and I know I haven't done anything illegal. But you know, maybe a pop-up ad did something to me and now I'm going to be reported.

I'm frustrated with everything. And the Indian people across the hallway are blasting Bollywood music just to piss everyone off, I think. All they do is be loud and let their kids rollerblade down the hallway, as I've shown in my pictures in the past. They just don't stop.

This all sounds very frustrating!

It seems your boss is taking a long time to take care of the work mate problem!?

Interesting about your uncle's internet. That would make anyone think the internet provider may be collecting information.

Loud neighbors? I am so sorry!
Maybe report them again?

You've been on my mind!
I was hoping all was going well for you!
Glad to have you posting!


WC

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

Thanks, Wild Coyote! And I hope you do enjoy a mellow day. Hopefully you'll soon adjust to your new medication dose. Lamictal actually has a history of becoming activating for me. Maybe it will shift gears soon for you.

Would you believe it! I figured out why I couldn't sleep last night. I blamed triggers, but I found this morning that I forgot to take my evening meds last night. Hubby asked mr about them late last night and I was so certain that I took them that I wouldn't even check. Plus, I've been delinquent about filling my pill boxes lately, but just one hour ago I see Saturday's box full. I guess I had gathered them to take them after dinner and put just Saturday in the box. The gathering itself convinced me that I took them, but I didn't. So all I took was the 50 mg "extra" Seroquel at 5 am. Luckily I did take my morning meds this morning. Time to finally fill the pill boxes!

Thank you!
I have found I get up earlier on Lamictal. It's this increase that has me tired. It will pass; it did before.

I am glad you have found the source of some of the difficulties you were experiencing last night!

WC

[~Christina]

Thanks for the new thread !!!!!!

Blue I would defiantly speak to you boss , all that’s going on is ridiculous

Bird ... oh my gosh I have done that before , I lay awake and night being afraid my meds no longer work and then get up in the am and see them looking at me with almost a evil grin.

Hopefully Wild your Lamictal will flip to a more sedative med at night.

Today ? I’m feeling pretty down. But I’m going to see a movie later “ indivisible “ there are some Greys anatomy actors in it that I love , I’m excited to see them play other characters.. plus I need a uplifting movie , hopefully help my mood.

Hope everyone has a good day and does at least one thing nice for yourself !!!!!!

meow, said the cow

nothing else to say, so. standard reply..

[Scooter9]

I've been on Modafinil for about 6 weeks now. I track my mood every day and can see I'm doing a little better!

I'm going from severely depressed to moderately depressed, so that's the good news. The bad news is that I'm still depressed. But I'll take this for now.

I have been really busy these past weeks cleaning out the house of a loved one whose husband passed away back in January. She's wheelchair-bound now and cannot help at all so my wife and I have been doing everything for her. It's hard work but we're almost done now.

Going through someone else's belongings and things by putting them away, selling some things, throwing away others is changing the way I look at my own life and the legacy I'm leaving (if anything beyond my kids). I look more long-term at the things I have now and the things I want to get: someone else is eventually going to become a steward of all of these things - even if that 'someone' is my kids, I want to make things easier on them somehow. I don't have any solutions yet but I'm thinking about it.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Scooter9

I've been on Modafinil for about 6 weeks now. I track my mood every day and can see I'm doing a little better!

I'm going from severely depressed to moderately depressed, so that's the good news. The bad news is that I'm still depressed. But I'll take this for now.

I have been really busy these past weeks cleaning out the house of a loved one whose husband passed away back in January. She's wheelchair-bound now and cannot help at all so my wife and I have been doing everything for her. It's hard work but we're almost done now.

Going through someone else's belongings and things by putting them away, selling some things, throwing away others is changing the way I look at my own life and the legacy I'm leaving (if anything beyond my kids). I look more long-term at the things I have now and the things I want to get: someone else is eventually going to become a steward of all of these things - even if that 'someone' is my kids, I want to make things easier on them somehow. I don't have any solutions yet but I'm thinking about it.

I am glad you are finding modafinil helpful. I hope it helps you more in time.

I often read about how you and your wife are helping others less fortunate. I am thankful there are people like you both and wish there were more people like you!

I am helping my mom clean out many years of saving things. She doesn't want her children to have to do it all if/when she is incapacitated or passes on. I am also sorting my stuff; I have too much stuff accumulate over the years, too.

Thanks again for being you!


WC

[Daonnachd]

I'm pretty down. I'm not actively suicidal, but I wish that instead of getting married I had ended my life in my twenties. Is there a shorthand term for this state of mind?

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

Lately, I've been doing a poor job of coping with stress. I'm still mad at the guy at my job who steals my work and then tells his boss and my boss that I didn't do anything. He also STILL accuses me of doing my work "incorrectly" when I told him 3 or 4 times that I don't have time to help him, and that I'm NOT finished with my work. He keeps doing it. Fortunately, my boss doesn't believe his stories because there's no way I could have done my work "incorrectly" if I allegedly "didn't do anything."

Anyway, this guy's b_llshit is stressing me out. I know my boss is taking care of it, but I'm still pissed at this guy for what he's been doing. Who knows what else he's said behind my back.

I feel like I've been eating normally for the most part, but the dr office says I've lost weight. I think stress just affects my metabolism or something. I'm not sure. But I'm also worn out and sleeping so much. I slept 10 hours last night and 12 the prior.

I can't take it anymore. And on top of that, I'm convinced my internet history is being browsed by my cable company and who knows what else. I haven't done anything illegal, but I think they see things like this website, which is embarrassing to me because then they'll discover my diagnoses. They didn't say they were browsing it and they've never done anything to me or said anything, but I think they are browsing it. I think they have the legal right to watch me, since they're selling me their service. I think they do it for fun. They've already watched my uncle's internet history and forced him to change his personal internet connection to a business connection because he was downloading too much stuff. Now I'm scared they're watching me and reporting me to the police over "suspicious activity" even though I believe I've done nothing wrong and I know I haven't done anything illegal. But you know, maybe a pop-up ad did something to me and now I'm going to be reported.

I'm frustrated with everything. And the Indian people across the hallway are blasting Bollywood music just to piss everyone off, I think. All they do is be loud and let their kids rollerblade down the hallway, as I've shown in my pictures in the past. They just don't stop.

Watching your internet content isnt the same as knowing how much bandwidth youre using. Some providets are not unlimited.

[Moose72]

I just saw First Man. Good movie but long and sad.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by Daonnachd

I'm pretty down. I'm not actively suicidal, but I wish that instead of getting married I had ended my life in my twenties. Is there a shorthand term for this state of mind?

Thank goodness you didnt! When I feel that way i hole myself up with a movie or book as a distraction.

[Daonnachd]

Originally Posted by Moose72

Thank goodness you didnt! When I feel that way i hole myself up with a movie or book as a distraction.

I have a book I'm working my way through. It's just sort of tough to stay engaged. Thanks for the push though, I'll pick it back up.

Doing ok, minus job anxiety.

I just sat back and relaxed the whole weekend. Nothing more, nothing less. Well, I did fix a few electronics, but now I don't know if I want to flip them on eBay considering that it's easy for buyers to destroy things and then file a claim about a "broken" item. So maybe I'll just collect these electronics for now and figure out what to do with them later.

I'm hoping that I don't spiral into a depression over all this overwhelming stress. I just don't want to lose my job. That's been on my mind these past two weeks.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

My pdoc just cancelled for tomorrow. I think she's sick. She offered next week but I have to babysit my niece so it won't work. I told her that I'm ok until my next appointment since I'm ok except the klonopin w/d and she can't magically fix that. Hopefully my sleep goes back to normal tonight; last night I was up until 5:30 or 6:00 AM and I'm tired. I couldn't get to the city to see her for 2 weeks and by then it's only 2 weeks until my next appointment so I'll be fine waiting. I hope.

Gotta fill my pill boxes. Hate that job but it is oh-so-important.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Daonnachd

I'm pretty down. I'm not actively suicidal, but I wish that instead of getting married I had ended my life in my twenties. Is there a shorthand term for this state of mind?

I am very sorry you are going through this.
I go through this at times, too. It's very painful. At the same time, I can be convinced that I should have done things very differently, especially when I am deeply depressed.

Thinking of you.

WC

[Pookyl]

Just for something different my knees have taken to buckling underneath me for no reason and without warning. One minute I’m standing up, the next I’m sitting on my tailbone.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

Pookyl-I've had that happen when my meds were lowering my blood pressure too much. Can you get your blood pressure checked? It's also worth checking in with your doctor as you don't want to be injured.