[Wild Coyote]

I'd finally slept very well last night. This morning was a chore! so tired, so very sleepy. All day long.

I saw pdoc. We decreased the seroquel a bit. (I want all of the way off.) Everything else stays the same. I had tweaked my meds on my own, yet again. This time,, we'd both decided I will not do so again, without her permission. (I might even so. I do not wait on meds, esp if I need an immediate change.) I will try to honor her wishes, however.

Went shopping for footwear. I HATE doing it. However, I'd gotten through it rather quickly. I have some very nasty plantar fasciitis. It is extremely painful. Docs told me I need some other shoes., some softer soles, etc. The shoe store was having a BOGO sale, so I made out okay! I was VERY lucky. I have to use a brace at night and orthotics in the daytime. Just had another foot brace added in for daytime activities. Still using a crutch, too.

Going to bed early,even if I do not sleep. Just want to relax!!!
Love to All ~

[fern46]

Jedi and Wild Coyote, I'm wishing you both a night of restful sleep. I'm counting sheep for you. One... Two.. Three.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by fern46

Jedi and Wild Coyote, I'm wishing you both a night of restful sleep. I'm counting sheep for you. One... Two.. Three.

Thanks, fern46!!! You are so very kind and supportive!

[LadyShadow]

Rough day today. My money never came, but they told me it was sent, so it is going to take three business days. It was really an uncomfortable and anxious day that left me paralyzed. I didn't even get any of my school work done.

Hope tomorrow is a better day.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by LadyShadow

Rough day today. My money never came, but they told me it was sent, so it is going to take three business days. It was really an uncomfortable and anxious day that left me paralyzed. I didn't even get any of my school work done.

Hope tomorrow is a better day.

Hi LadyShadow,

I am very sorry for all you've gone through today.
You are in a very frustrating situation!

I, too, hope you have a MUCH better day tomorrow.

Oh yuck, it’s 3:20am ish. I wish I could sleep.

This has to stop at some point. It’s driving me nuts!

Is anyone else wide awake? I’m getting desperate for sleep!

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

Oh yuck, it’s 3:20am ish. I wish I could sleep.

This has to stop at some point. It’s driving me nuts!

Is anyone else wide awake? I’m getting desperate for sleep!

Hi Blue, I have been awake. I need to go back to sleep, if I can do so!!!

[Jedi67]

Originally Posted by fern46

Jedi and Wild Coyote, I'm wishing you both a night of restful sleep. I'm counting sheep for you. One... Two.. Three.

you're the best, fern46! thanks!

[Jedi67]

in the throes of of a mixed episode even tho I slept some. woke up restless, agitated and manic. but also feeling numb, lonely and tired. took a kpin and some natural anti-anxiety supplements. wish me luck, gang!

It's almost 11 am and my husband is still sleeping. I'm raring to get going. I want to go and look for a runner rug for our kitchen at the local housewares shop. I doubt he'll be willing to go. I'd go myself, but I would need help carrying it. Plus, hubby always wants a say in what we have for the house. I don't know why I have a husband that cares so much about those types of things. Many husband's let their wives buy whatever they want for the house.

At 3 pm we're having a window salesman come to present their windows and give us a quote. We can't really afford them, but may just buy a garden window and sliding doors, initially. Really, we need all of the windows replaced.

I'm going to go and arrange some flowers now. There are a lot of farm stands in the summer that sell vegetables and flowers. I am lucky hubby often brings home some.

[Nammu]

A night of very little sleep. Just took two officially maximum amount of Ambien. That plus mum kept turning off the AC and its terribly humid out. I did finally fall asleep and dreamed of a society where there were the regulars who lived in front, and the hiddens who lived behind the regulars. It was a highly regimented society, with a lot of rules for the hidden ones. There homes were attached and the hidden couldn't have anything but bare wood as decorations.

Me too! Very little sleep. Nightmare about being a

Possible trigger:

hostage

and trying to escape. It was hard to get up, but it's my first day back after the yet-another-eye issue, so there ya have it. I'm GLAD to be going back -- making no money is no good(!) Still, it would have been nice to go in actually having slept worth a damn.

Speaking of which, I need to get going. Wishing everyone a good day!

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

Hi Blue, I have been awake. I need to go back to sleep, if I can do so!!!

I managed to go back to sleep for another hour, but that’s it.

Hopefully you got some good rest?

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

I managed to go back to sleep for another hour, but that’s it.

Hopefully you got some good rest?

Hi Blue!
I did not get back to sleep. I'd rested though.
Am very tired today. I think a part of this severe tiredness is med-related.
I did cut back on Seroquel last night, as per pdoc. It did disturb my sleep; however, I am hoping I will adjust.

I hope you are having a good weekend!

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Innerzone

Me too! Very little sleep. Nightmare about being a

Possible trigger:

hostage

and trying to escape. It was hard to get up, but it's my first day back after the yet-another-eye issue, so there ya have it. I'm GLAD to be going back -- making no money is no good(!) Still, it would have been nice to go in actually having slept worth a damn.

Speaking of which, I need to get going. Wishing everyone a good day!

Wow! That must have been an anxiety-filled nightmare!
Interesting theme.

I hope you are having a good day at work.

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

Hi Blue!
I did not get back to sleep. I'd rested though.
Am very tired today. I think a part of this severe tiredness is med-related.
I did cut back on Seroquel last night, as per pdoc. It did disturb my sleep; however, I am hoping I will adjust.

I hope you are having a good weekend!

It took me a while to adjust to having no seroquel in my system. I think I “recovered” faster than most people do when they stop seroquel, but it still took about 2 weeks for me to really get back into a normal sleeping schedule.

Hopefully you recover soon. I’m not even off my rexulti entirely, so I expect things to get worse before they get better.

My weekend is alright. Binge watching Game of Thrones. 🤓

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Nammu

A night of very little sleep. Just took two officially maximum amount of Ambien. That plus mum kept turning off the AC and its terribly humid out. I did finally fall asleep and dreamed of a society where there were the regulars who lived in front, and the hiddens who lived behind the regulars. It was a highly regimented society, with a lot of rules for the hidden ones. There homes were attached and the hidden couldn't have anything but bare wood as decorations.

I cannot sleep in the heat/humidity. I have to have AC in my bedroom (which is upstairs -- the whole heat rises thing).

Another interesting dream! Quite a theme. Seems like something out of an Ayn Rand novel. (?)

I enJOY reading your posts. It's a treat to have you posting more often!

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

It took me a while to adjust to having no seroquel in my system. I think I “recovered” faster than most people do when they stop seroquel, but it still took about 2 weeks for me to really get back into a normal sleeping schedule.

Hopefully you recover soon. I’m not even off my rexulti entirely, so I expect things to get worse before they get better.

My weekend is alright. Binge watching Game of Thrones. 🤓

Thanks for the info and your support!

I hope things don't get worse as you taper off of Rexulti. Maybe the worst of it hits first? I hope it is over with.

If you are up in the middle of the night, and feel like it, just give a shout. If I am awake, we'll... ummm.. . what will we do? Lol! I have not a clue!

[BeyondtheRainbow]

My antibiotics cleared my system, I ate some real food and I am sick again. I'll email my NP Monday but it's clear this isn't going to just go away. I'm back to a fridge full of Gatorade and applesauce and a stockpile of bread for toast.

I'm so frustrated. I'm also so tired as I was up sick much of the night. I'm already trying to figure out how to see my therapist (he's an hour away) and knowing I probably should do a phone session which I really do not like much. Oh well. Better than no therapy. Maybe things will settle down in time.

Hopefully they'll get me in to the GI doctor quickly if that's what they feel is needed. This needs to stop. I've now been sick 5 weeks and have had 2 rounds of antibiotics.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

It's almost 11 am and my husband is still sleeping. I'm raring to get going. I want to go and look for a runner rug for our kitchen at the local housewares shop. I doubt he'll be willing to go. I'd go myself, but I would need help carrying it. Plus, hubby always wants a say in what we have for the house. I don't know why I have a husband that cares so much about those types of things. Many husband's let their wives buy whatever they want for the house.

At 3 pm we're having a window salesman come to present their windows and give us a quote. We can't really afford them, but may just buy a garden window and sliding doors, initially. Really, we need all of the windows replaced.

I'm going to go and arrange some flowers now. There are a lot of farm stands in the summer that sell vegetables and flowers. I am lucky hubby often brings home some.

I hope you were able to look for the runner you had wanted.
I do not like shopping. I usually have a list and go in just for the items on the list. I run in, run around, and then run back out! Lol! In my dreams! I am not able to run anywhere right now.

I need to have a "weatherization inspection" here. I KNOW it will demonstrate the fact that I need new windows. However, depending upon the results (and upon the remedy taken by the owner),sometimes, the local "energy companies" offer discounts to participants.

Arranging flowers sounds so peaceful. Do you find it peaceful?

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow

My antibiotics cleared my system, I ate some real food and I am sick again. I'll email my NP Monday but it's clear this isn't going to just go away. I'm back to a fridge full of Gatorade and applesauce and a stockpile of bread for toast.

I'm so frustrated. I'm also so tired as I was up sick much of the night. I'm already trying to figure out how to see my therapist (he's an hour away) and knowing I probably should do a phone session which I really do not like much. Oh well. Better than no therapy. Maybe things will settle down in time.

Hopefully they'll get me in to the GI doctor quickly if that's what they feel is needed. This needs to stop. I've now been sick 5 weeks and have had 2 rounds of antibiotics.

I am very sorry this illness continues to plague you.
I, too, hope you will get to see a GI doc, asap.

(I did not realize you have not seen one yet.)

Have you ever done a therapy appointment with your therapist via Skype or another similar type of service/program?

I truly wish I could help you in some way.
You are in my thoughts and in my prayers.

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

Thanks for the info and your support!

I hope things don't get worse as you taper off of Rexulti. Maybe the worst of it hits first? I hope it is over with.

If you are up in the middle of the night, and feel like it, just give a shout. If I am awake, we'll... ummm.. . what will we do? Lol! I have not a clue!

So far, the only negative withdrawal symptoms I’ve experienced are sleep disturbances. I’m now taking only 2mg of rexulti instead of 4mg (max dose is 4mg). When I had symptoms before, it’s because I went cold turkey (4mg to 0mg), so I’m trying to get down to 1mg before finally stopping it altogether. (It’d also be impossible to cut a tiny 4mg pill into eighths if I wanted to go down to 0.5mg, which some people do take.)

I would like to get advice from my therapist on coping mechanisms in case symptoms return, but the last time I tried to do that, she ratted me out to my pdoc that I stopped taking my meds! She told him everything! But other therapists have waiting lists... so I will stick with her. But she is kinda mean sometimes... Like that time she said I have no friends “most likely because you have flat affect, which makes people think you’re not interested in them.” Gee, thanks. Didn’t even offer to help “fix” it. She said, “flat affect? That’s how some people are. They don’t learn how to communicate properly like their peers do. You have communication issues.”

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

So far, the only negative withdrawal symptoms I’ve experienced are sleep disturbances. I’m now taking only 2mg of rexulti instead of 4mg (max dose is 4mg). When I had symptoms before, it’s because I went cold turkey (4mg to 0mg), so I’m trying to get down to 1mg before finally stopping it altogether. (It’d also be impossible to cut a tiny 4mg pill into eighths if I wanted to go down to 0.5mg, which some people do take.)

I would like to get advice from my therapist on coping mechanisms in case symptoms return, but the last time I tried to do that, she ratted me out to my pdoc that I stopped taking my meds! She told him everything! But other therapists have waiting lists... so I will stick with her. But she is kinda mean sometimes... Like that time she said I have no friends “most likely because you have flat affect, which makes people think you’re not interested in them.” Gee, thanks. Didn’t even offer to help “fix” it. She said, “flat affect? That’s how some people are. They don’t learn how to communicate properly like their peers do. You have communication issues.”

I hope your med taper goes okay.

I don't understand your therapist's approach. She did not offer suggestions?

Do you think you have flat affect outside of her office?

If so, do you think you might be able to consciously work at showing emotion?

Do your parents show emotions?

My mother had always smiled, no matter what. So, that is what I had learned. Eventually, I had learned that smiling, no matter what happens, is not appropriate. I then had to work on allowing myself to show other emotions.
(I also had to learn to feel okay about having emotions I then thought were not cool to experience and to let others in on the fact that I might have some emotions other than happiness and smiling!)

If you do tend to hide your emotions, I think you could work at this and will have good luck. If you feel your affect is just fine, ignore your therapist and...me! Lol! I think you know I love ya!

[yellow_fleurs]

Moving this weekend. I have some friends helping me with furniture tomorrow, but other than that doing most of it myself. It's just a studio and I don't have that much stuff, but it always seems like more than I remember when I try to move. Worked for 8 hours already and got most boxes moved. I am proud of myself, although I hope this doesn't set me back in physical therapy. I sort of did more than I should have I think. A good workout though! Now I am eating a burrito before I start cleaning. I needed to rest and refuel. I like my new place, though. It's more open and I think I could have friends over. I am feeling pretty happy right now, but in the back of my mind are thoughts telling me I am a bad person and that every time I am nice I am just being fake and it's an act. I need to just not engage with these thoughts I guess? They are annoying and tiring, why do I have to keep getting sucked into this? Also I have noticed when I come across something (perhaps a picture or whatever) that reminds me of a time when I was in a bad place, perhaps depression and OCD thoughts were bad, that it kind of triggers a memory of that feeling. Does anyone else experience something like this I wonder?
Hope everyone's having a nice weekend, I will catch up with posts once I am done running around.

[Nammu]

Hope the moving goes smoothly.