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#626
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The prn Haldol has kicked in. Im drowsy, and a little bit "drunk" feeling. Watvhing a movie.
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
![]() Anonymous46341, bizi, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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![]() Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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#627
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Two days ago I increased my Lithium a little and have put the taper on hold. The awful symptoms have disappeared thankfully. Now I will stay on this dose till I see my pdoc in two weeks. Then we will work out a slower taper that will avoid such awful withdrawals.
Still really tired. Trying to motivate myself to go for a walk soon. Gosh my life is boring.
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Bipolar 1 with psychotic features PTSD ![]() "Phew! For a minute there I lost myself." 'Karma Police' by Radiohead |
![]() Anonymous45023, Anonymous46341, bizi, fern46, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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![]() bizi, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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#628
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Quote:
Is your hubby home? Do you feel safe with him? bizi
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lamictal 2x a day haldol 2x a day cogentin 2x a day klonipin , 1mg at night, fish oil coq10 multi vit,, vit c, at noon, tumeric, caffeine Remeron at night, zyprexa, requip2-4mg |
![]() Sunflower123, Wild Coyote
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![]() Wild Coyote
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#629
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Quote:
Are you more concerned about hurting yourself or being harmed by someone else? ![]()
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May we each fully claim the courage to live from our hearts, to allow Love, Faith and Hope to enLighten our paths. ![]() |
![]() bizi, Sunflower123
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#630
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Quote:
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May we each fully claim the courage to live from our hearts, to allow Love, Faith and Hope to enLighten our paths. ![]() |
![]() bizi, Sunflower123
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![]() Wander
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#631
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He's home and I am safe but I'm getting annoyed being dragged everywhere for my safety.
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Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
![]() bizi, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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#632
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Are you more concerned about hurting yourself or being harmed by someone else? I'm more concerned about someone else but to prove to myself I'm okay I generally want to self harm. It's a really tough spot to be in. I need to handle it because my h isn't always going to be available and I won't always be aloud to sit and wait for him.
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Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
![]() Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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#633
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What do you mean by “ I need to handle it because my H isn’t always going to be available and won’t always be allowed to sit and wait for him” ? Why would that change ?
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Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
![]() Sunflower123, Wild Coyote
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![]() Wild Coyote
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#634
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H is in school and getting more involved. The end goal is for him to freelance. I can't go with him to his freelance meetings. He's getting involved with clubs I'm not a student so some of the meetings I can't nor would I want to go. I end up waiting in the library for his classes/meetings to be done. I'm trying to be souportive but I want to stay home. I need to make it so I can safely be home alone for 8 hrs or more. It's like he's getting so wrapped up in networking he's forgetting I'm stuck riding/ waiting for him. If I can get my paranoia under control maybe I can manage to stay home at least some of the time.
But even now with everyone sleeping I don't feel real and want to "check" to be sure.
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Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
![]() Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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![]() ~Christina
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#635
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I've definitely been depressed more often than not the past several weeks. No manic episodes in a long time though. I've been on long-term disability from my job for most ot there year and don't intend to go back. Finding a new one is challenging. I worked a corporate job and 4 years of my boss's bullying and harrassment was one of the several contributors for me going on disiability and into IOP earlier this year.
My spending is okay even though I do have impulses. Nothing makor I only bought a video game a few mangas |
![]() Anonymous45023, fern46, Nammu, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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![]() ~Christina
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#636
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I showered today.
it hurt set me up for a day of pain |
![]() Anonymous46341, De Luca, fern46, Moose72, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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![]() ~Christina
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#637
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I used to do a blog my self a couple years ago but took it down out of insecurity. I liked to write but found writing straightforward about myself gave me too much anxiety and fear of someone figuring out who I was. Instead I wrote about myself through a fictional story and characters to mask myself if anyone read it. Seemed to work for me and bring out quite a lot of subconsious thoughts I wasn't aware of. Thanks for sharing your art and website. |
![]() Anonymous46341, Blue_Bird, Nammu, Sunflower123
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![]() Blue_Bird
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#638
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Maybe you could instead... Pinch yourself? Look in the mirror? Call a random store and ask for directions so you can hear a person respond to you? Post here and see the responses from us? Scream so you can hear your voice? If you have to see blood maybe you can prick yourself with a needle? That's less invasive than the alternative. I still don't like it though. Just a few ideas. I know many here have good ideas of how to do reality checks. |
![]() Sunflower123
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![]() Sunflower123, ~Christina
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#639
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Possible trigger:
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Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
![]() Sunflower123
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![]() ~Christina
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#640
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![]() Sunflower123
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#641
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Yes I can. That helps a lot.
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Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
![]() Sunflower123, Wild Coyote
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![]() childofchaos831, Wild Coyote
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#642
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I off to ECT in a few minutes.
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>< |
![]() Anonymous45023, Anonymous46341, Nammu, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835, Victoria'smom, Wild Coyote
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![]() childofchaos831, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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#643
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I wish you well.
![]() It's wonderful to have you posting here with us again! ![]()
__________________
May we each fully claim the courage to live from our hearts, to allow Love, Faith and Hope to enLighten our paths. ![]() |
![]() Sunflower123
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#644
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That's a great idea that you wrote through a fictional story and characters,I'm glad it helped you, that's very creative ![]()
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“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
![]() De Luca, Sunflower123, Wild Coyote
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![]() De Luca, Wild Coyote
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#645
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It also kwpt me very busy so my depression wasn't bad during those 6 weeks I wrote it. I'm a firm believer in art and creativity to help cope, especially after I wrote all that stuff. |
![]() Blue_Bird, Sunflower123, Wild Coyote
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![]() Blue_Bird, Wild Coyote
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#646
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I am definitly manic. This week I have over spent my budget and had sex with a guy I barely know, who is 20 years younger than me. I haven't had an episode this bad since 2009. My psychiatrist is going to be very upset with me. I'm acting like a silly school girl. I'm 67, for God's sake. I thought I had put this all behind me.
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Bipolar I, Depression, GAD Meds: Zoloft, Zyprexa, Ritalin "Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." -Buddha ![]() |
![]() Anonymous45023, BeyondtheRainbow, BipolarWolf, Blue_Bird, De Luca, Nammu, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote, wildflowerchild25
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![]() Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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#647
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![]() I hope you find the support and the information you may be seeking. Please do make yourself at home! It's wonderful you have jumped in and have made yourself at home! I look forward to your posting! ![]()
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May we each fully claim the courage to live from our hearts, to allow Love, Faith and Hope to enLighten our paths. ![]() |
![]() De Luca, Sunflower123
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![]() De Luca
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#648
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it's good to have you back! ![]() I am sorry you are having a difficult time. ![]() Have you been in touch with your pdoc? It sounds like you need immediate intervention. Please do contact you pdoc if you haven't done so. Please stay safe! Keep reaching out here and anywhere you find helpful! ![]()
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May we each fully claim the courage to live from our hearts, to allow Love, Faith and Hope to enLighten our paths. ![]() |
![]() Sunflower123
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![]() gayleggg
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#649
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I got the "blahs" you know where no matter what you do everything is just BLAH. I am not sure why either, I see my son today and usually on those days I am not blah. I hope it passes, I feel tired and like I need a nap. I think I will try to take one here in a bit. I did some vacuuming and some housework, took a shower and am just going thru different posts here on PC. Hope everyone is doing ok today.
/hug
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current meds: -Oxcarbazepine -Gabapentin -Hydroxyzine -Risperidone -Zoloft Psychotherapy 2-3 times a month as needed Bipolar 1, PTSD |
![]() Anonymous45023, De Luca, fern46, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote
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![]() Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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#650
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Thanks, I'm forcing myself to post and participate. I have social anxiety, even when I do post I typically regret it in about 5 minutes. The fear of judgement thing, although rationally I know I'm not being judged. Something I always struggled with and still do.
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![]() Anonymous45023, BipolarWolf, Sunflower123, Wild Coyote, wildflowerchild25
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![]() Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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