[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

@Lizzie1813

I have experienced panic and anxiety and catastrophic thoughts as well. I began getting panic attacks way back in February. It escalated to the point of a complete paranoid break from reality.

I’m in a program now. I’ve learned a couple of things. First of all, the cold is a good tactic. Also, to go even further, sticking your face in a sink full of cold water can also help you “snap out” of it.

I also write positive affirmations of sorts. Just write over and over again that it is ok, no reason to panic, we’re all safe, whatever you think you need to hear at the moment.

Also, my therapist recommended a comfort object. I found a soft weighted stuffed unicorn at the store. I spray her with a nice perfume because scents help me get grounded as well.

Thanks for sharing this.

[Mountaindewed]

I have bad period like cramps. I don’t want to explain things really to my mom. Not exactly the way things have been happening. I had to explain it to my primary a few weeks ago and that was uncomfortable. I had to tell him “this is super awkward but you know how the injections increase your libido?” I can’t even begin how to describe this to my mom.

I took 2 extra strength Tylenol. I forgot you had to eat with Tylenol or you’d feel real sick to your stomach. I didn’t really eat much. I was hangry but then barely ate anything at the restaurant. I picked at the food when I came home. I don’t think there’s anything major wrong that needs immediate attention but this is for sure not just anxiety. It could possibly be made worse by my anxiety though. Unless I get a fever I will not go to a doctor before my vacation.

My Tylenol seems to be kicking in. I used the heating pad too. I’m still not hungry. I’m very tired but I took my melatonin an hour ago. I took my first dose of my antibiotic.

Sorry for all the health anxiety posts. But I have this huge bump on my forehead. It doesn’t itch. But I’ve been rubbing it all afternoon absent mindlessly. The last time I had something like that it was cellulitis. And I’ve already had that twice once in 2007 and once in 2019. so I’m already more likely to get it again then someone who hasn’t had it.

Maybe my body is crapping out subconsciously so I don’t have to go on my vacation.

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

I love reading!! I just finished a vampire type series, and also The Science of Getting Started: How to Beat Procrastination, Summon Productivity, and Stop Self-Sabotage by Peter Hollins. The next book I'm planning to read is Notes on a Nervous Planet by Matt Haig. It's about mental health and how being connected 24/7 to like smart phones, internet, affects us

I've been reading ''the girl who speaks bear''

[*Beth*]

I've had 2 therapy appointments and 1 pdoc appointment in person this week. What a relief! SO much more is accomplished by seeing them in person, rather than by telehealth.

Tomorrow I'm meeting my friend Mary for lunch. I have a tiny bit of anxiety about it, but since she and I have been friends for 58 years - all of our lives - my excitement is more intense than my anxiety is.

In other news...here we go sliding into a week-end of scorching, over 100 degrees days. Oregon and Washington are in dire straights due to the extreme heat, which they have never had before. They've haven't needed a/c, so most don't have a/c. People are literally dying. It's horrific.

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by BethRags

I've had 2 therapy appointments and 1 pdoc appointment in person this week. What a relief! SO much more is accomplished by seeing them in person, rather than by telehealth.

Tomorrow I'm meeting my friend Mary for lunch. I have a tiny bit of anxiety about it, but since she and I have been friends for 58 years - all of our lives - my excitement is more intense than my anxiety is.

In other news...here we go sliding into a week-end of scorching, over 100 degrees days. Oregon and Washington are in dire straights due to the extreme heat, which they have never had before. They've haven't needed a/c, so most don't have a/c. People are literally dying. It's horrific.

That's great that you've had 2 therapy appointments and 1 pdoc appointment in person this week.

I hope you have fun tomorrow having lunch with your friend Mary

I'm sorry about the extreme heat

[Lizzie1813]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

@Lizzie1813

I have experienced panic and anxiety and catastrophic thoughts as well. I began getting panic attacks way back in February. It escalated to the point of a complete paranoid break from reality.

I’m in a program now. I’ve learned a couple of things. First of all, the cold is a good tactic. Also, to go even further, sticking your face in a sink full of cold water can also help you “snap out” of it.

I also write positive affirmations of sorts. Just write over and over again that it is ok, no reason to panic, we’re all safe, whatever you think you need to hear at the moment.

Also, my therapist recommended a comfort object. I found a soft weighted stuffed unicorn at the store. I spray her with a nice perfume because scents help me get grounded as well.

Thank you! I will try these things. I’m glad you’ve been able to learning some things that help you.

[Lizzie1813]

I heard back from my pdoc. She increased my Lamictal from 200 mg to 300 mg for my worsening anxiety. Hoping hard that it starts helping soon.

[Mountaindewed]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

@Lizzie1813

I have experienced panic and anxiety and catastrophic thoughts as well. I began getting panic attacks way back in February. It escalated to the point of a complete paranoid break from reality.

I’m in a program now. I’ve learned a couple of things. First of all, the cold is a good tactic. Also, to go even further, sticking your face in a sink full of cold water can also help you “snap out” of it.

I also write positive affirmations of sorts. Just write over and over again that it is ok, no reason to panic, we’re all safe, whatever you think you need to hear at the moment.

Also, my therapist recommended a comfort object. I found a soft weighted stuffed unicorn at the store. I spray her with a nice perfume because scents help me get grounded as well.

Is cold better then hot? I’ve tried taking cold showers before because I’ve heard they have a lot of good health benefits. But I can’t stand them. I use a heating pad when I’m anxious and that helps with my mental and physical health.

[Fuzzybear]

I don't understand people.

[*Beth*]

We've had an earthquake! Oh, my goodness. I was lying on my bed, tired after my therapy session, suddenly my bed felt like someone was shaking it hard, back and forth. I don't know yet what the magnitude was.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by BethRags

We've had an earthquake! Oh, my goodness. I was lying on my bed, tired after my therapy session, suddenly my bed felt like someone was shaking it hard, back and forth. I don't know yet what the magnitude was.

Wow. That must've been scary and confusing!

[~Christina]

Tomorrow with be my 10Th Anniversary on PC

I stumbled onto here a sobbing disaster. I didn't know what had happened to my life... Everything imploded.

The friendships I have made over the years have truly saved my life. Can't imagine my life without them.

[Blue_Bird]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

I don't understand people.

I hope you're okay Fuzzy

[MuddyBoots]

Going insane. From insomnia. From the insatiable hypersexuality. From these racing thoughts about how great the universe would be if we pushed the limits of dimensions and could see hear smell taste everything and thoughts of how comparatively terribly limiting life on Earth is, but what about all the things I haven't yet explored that I could? I'm going insane from all this energy and all these ideas, but exercise of any kind hurts right now and my keys have been taken away from me for my own safety. All these limitations!

Possible trigger:

I should've swallowed all those pills I flushed down the toilet. Wouldn't be so frustrated now, now would I? Wouldn't be bothering everyone around me. Wouldn't. Would. Not.

[Nammu]

Originally Posted by Sapien

Going insane. From insomnia. From the insatiable hypersexuality. From these racing thoughts about how great the universe would be if we pushed the limits of dimensions and could see hear smell taste everything and thoughts of how comparatively terribly limiting life on Earth is, but what about all the things I haven't yet explored that I could? I'm going insane from all this energy and all these ideas, but exercise of any kind hurts right now and my keys have been taken away from me for my own safety. All these limitations!

Possible trigger:

I should've swallowed all those pills I flushed down the toilet. Wouldn't be so frustrated now, now would I? Wouldn't be bothering everyone around me. Wouldn't. Would. Not.

But we want you here.

[leomama]

Feeling down. Maybe I should take the Wellbutrin but I didn’t like what it was doing to my resting heart rate. Gotta go to bed soon, get up early for work. I maybe able to get my old job back which would make me happy. My current job is a downer. The paycheck isn’t enough to make me happy.

I feel so hungry I feel nauseious

I've had bad food this week, for sure- but yesterday took the biscuit.. it was horrible. I spent the entire night with a bad, empty achy stomach, and even today in the shower I felt bleh

did eat breakfast, but didn't enjoy it like I usually do. nausea sucks

[MuddyBoots]

I had a very enlightening night last night and I've realized something deeply secretive about my purpose here. I've started it, but I'm scared they're scared and will react as such. I'm not supposed to be here long, but I've got to get back into my own reality before the parasites take over. God is a force and IT does what's right for the journey. I'm afraid it's a lost cause, butthere's always something better out there and we'll always have our energies about us.

I'm very stressed by this and I don't know how to get the word out as I'm struggling with translations. I want to give up so badly but the force is making it hard for a reason. Maybe I can battle. Perhaps my word to spread won't do a damn thing. It's raining hard, it's raining knowledge. A drop a rain is the equivalent to a black hole, or even a quasar, or it's equivalent to a quark, whatever you want. It's all the same, is what I'm saying. I have to leave hints, so pardon a quip of snips and slits.

But please don't fight the force. You really can't, but I've thought and the parasites are going to take over. It's a spiritual parasite and it's not bad it just benefits from idealism.

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by Moose72

Wow. That must've been scary and confusing!

It was weird, that's for sure. Earthquakes are always strange, though. There's a sound that comes along with the shaking/rolling...the sound is like a huge, deep hum. This one was a 6.0 magnitude.

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Tomorrow with be my 10Th Anniversary on PC

I stumbled onto here a sobbing disaster. I didn't know what had happened to my life... Everything imploded.

The friendships I have made over the years have truly saved my life. Can't imagine my life without them.

Congratulations, Christina! 10 years is really special

[wildflowerchild25]

I’m feeling better today. I’m happy that my claim was approved and hoping I can get back pay and pay going forward. I’m happy that I took the initiative to contact an officiant. I’m going to speak with her on the phone later to get to know her a little bit. I’m also going to contact a photographer that I think is going to be cheaper than most because I’m only looking for a four hour session, not a whole wedding. It’s also a company with multiple photographers so I’m hoping one of them is available for our wedding date.

I’ve been eating well and not bingeing. Not eating pork roll sandwiches for breakfast and cheese sandwiches or hotdogs for lunch. Yesterday we did go out but I only ate have my food. Plus I had planned for it so I didn’t feel as freaked out. I’m worried about tomorrow a little bit, we’re going to a fair and it is difficult to find healthy food at a fair! I’ll probably eat before so I’m not hungry when I go.

I have some things to do today, but I’ve got to make a list because I will not remember it all!

[Soupe du jour]

Originally Posted by BethRags

It was weird, that's for sure. Earthquakes are always strange, though. There's a sound that comes along with the shaking/rolling...the sound is like a huge, deep hum. This one was a 6.0 magnitude.

I am east coast gal, but did live in Berkeley, CA for two years and Taiwan for almost a year. I felt earthquakes in both places. The first I ever felt was in Berkeley and I think it was only a 5.5 (or so), but it was scary and its epicenter was in northern Berkeley, so we felt the brunt. In Taiwan, I was actually severely depressed and in bed, skipping work. I was so depressed that I just stayed in bed through it (the bed was sliding the whole length of the room and back, on tile) and then went back to sleep.

I hope that quake is not followed by aftershocks.

[Lizzie1813]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

I started out super upset this morning. Just feeling like crap all around. I felt even worse because I KNOW I’m bringing this on myself on purpose to punish myself. I need to do my affirmations.

I’m sorry you’re upset and not feeling well. I think we punish ourselves so much more than others do. I’m glad you use affirmations. Do you use any that are the opposite of needing to punish yourself? Maybe something like, “I deserve to be treated with compassion, especially by myself.” ? I hope you feel better today.

[Soupe du jour]

I've felt pretty bad today, so far. Last night I forgot my evening medications until very late (around 2 am). I truly thought I took them, but when I just can't sleep, it's clear I did. Whenever I discover this my mood heads south quickly. It is usually sort of mixed with anxiety, or depressed. Crazy stuff goes on in my head. I was thinking about up and leaving and going to Ireland, of all places. But then I imagined myself there getting sick. I then realized that I forgot my husband's cell phone number. For real. I then get this reoccurring daydream that I'll be hospitalized wherever I run away to. Then when I finally did wake up after falling asleep, I started to feel that Hubby had been distant to me. It's after 4 pm. I think only after about 1 pm did that notion start to fade. Truth is he hasn't been that affectionate lately. But then I haven't either. I actually slept on the futon last night. Partly as a rebellion because of that and also because I've been a bit physically miserable. Sleeping on the futon seems to prevent my morning back and arm pain, and minimizes numb hands.

My husband called our new GP and asked that he finally order blood tests for me. I'll go for them on Tuesday. I'm way overdue. My old nephrologist had prescribed blood pressure and cholesterol meds about a year ago, and I never once had a follow-up to see how well they're helping. The blood pressure I've monitored and it does seem improved, but I can't know about the cholesterol. I have also worried about other results. Hypochondria has set in a bit, likely because of my mood decrease.

[Lizzie1813]

Originally Posted by Sapien

Going insane. From insomnia. From the insatiable hypersexuality. From these racing thoughts about how great the universe would be if we pushed the limits of dimensions and could see hear smell taste everything and thoughts of how comparatively terribly limiting life on Earth is, but what about all the things I haven't yet explored that I could? I'm going insane from all this energy and all these ideas, but exercise of any kind hurts right now and my keys have been taken away from me for my own safety. All these limitations!

Possible trigger:

I should've swallowed all those pills I flushed down the toilet. Wouldn't be so frustrated now, now would I? Wouldn't be bothering everyone around me. Wouldn't. Would. Not.

I’m sorry you are hurting. I can relate to the intensity of emotions and racing thoughts. You are not alone. You’re not bothering us. You belong here, and we are your friends.