Bipolar check-in #61

Oh your dream sounds wonderful. I woke up wanted to go back into my dream but I couldn’t remember it, only that it was cool.

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Originally Posted by ~Christina It’s much warmer today in the low 40’s ! But rain rain rain rain rain. I’m living off Sudafed and my head is still in a vise. My Fibromyalgia is awful. Winter is such a literal pain when the weather fronts come my way. I have a dental appointment first thing in the morning and I’m dreading it. I know I need stuff done but trying to pay for it is another thing. We have a Care Credit we can use. I just hope and pray I don’t need root canals or crowns. Decades of dry mouth from medications cause so much damage. I see the Breast Specialist on the 17th which has me very worried of course as numerous friends are also dealing with additional testing. Prior to my screening Mammo they checked to see when my last vaccine was because women are having things show up from the vaccines. Many case studies are showing it’s not all that rare. I can not get the booster vaccine until all this gets sorted out. There has to be problems from a new vaccine of course. Then my routine visit with my Rheumatologist the 24th. The first of the year with deductibles just stress me beyond belief. Regardless of all that stuff going on I am grateful that my husband is much better, I was able to stop my prednisone after just 4 days and my Asthma flare isn’t on going. Gus is just so chill today Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Those are many stresses. You're taking good care of yourself, though, and THAT is commendable! I will be thinking of you tomorrow morning and sending *good teeth* vibes to you.

I’m glad things are calming down. Yeah cool Gus!

Here's a little opera singer and a violinist:

The gabapentin is working! My anxiety is so much less severe. I feel like I have a life.

I'm okay with discussing any type of sexuality and sexual practices. Of course, a trigger warning is always appropriate for those who are disturbed by such discussion.

Our weather is nice winter weather - although we need rain, of course. None in sight Temperatures around 58 during the day, colder at night. I get lots of kitties on my bed at night.


Love all around

Beth Oh it’s good to hear that finally something is working on the anxiety. It’s been a long time coming.

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Originally Posted by Nammu Beth Oh it’s good to hear that finally something is working on the anxiety. It’s been a long time coming.

Thank you, Nammu. I feel as if I've been released from prison.

Christina• I'm thinking of you! (And Gus is just so cute! I love his nose!)

Beth, I hope the gabapentin keeps working for you. I've been on it 6 years and it still works. I think my dose has gone up a bit but mostly to help with lowering my clonazepam dose. I like it.

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Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow Beth, I hope the gabapentin keeps working for you. I've been on it 6 years and it still works. I think my dose has gone up a bit but mostly to help with lowering my clonazepam dose. I like it.

Thank you, Rainbow

Bob Saget dying is a shocker. Only 65. I've been watching him on TV since I was 11. No joke I was actually just thinking about Bob Saget and this time I actually posted it on facebook on the 1st instead of keeping it to myself or telling my mom. I doubt anyone will get it. But I do have quite a knack at this stuff. They do say celeberitys die in 3's. At leas the big ones. Betty White on New Years Eve. Sidney poitier 3 days ago and Bob Saget tonight.

I took my geodon super early. I ate a crap ton of snacks and some pizza and fell asleep at like 4:30. I woke up at 8:30 thinking wtf. Then I realized I had not taken my melatoinin or fallen asleep with my music. So I basically just napped for 4 hours. I'll take the melatonin now.

Thats what I get for drinking too much caffeine. Needing my meds early which causes side effects like hunger and tiredness.

Ugh. My stomach’s been messed up all weekend. I ate like total crap from Friday through today, mainly because of hormones. I’m sure that didn’t help. The stomach issues have been going on for months but it’s gotten much worse since I’ve started vraylar. And of course, it just so happens that abdominal pain, indigestion, and even gastritis are semi common side effects this happens so often for me, I find something great and the side effects are unbearable. I mean I would be fine with the increased appetite because it didn’t increase craving so I was able to have snacks like fruits and vegetables to help stave the hunger off and still be satisfied. But the pain and other symptoms just SUCK.

I think I’m going to call my pdoc’s office and see if she can call me or see me earlier to discuss the problem. I’m still going to avoid processed food and dairy as much as I can in the hope that it helps. It seems the poor eating decisions of the weekend only worsened the situation.

My boredom was unbearable today so i forced myself to get back to Scrabble and just play to pass the time, not pay any attention to winning. I had a great time! I played three hours-worth of games. I played surprisingly well! Being more relaxed and natural about my playing seems to actually help! I'm going back to my Scrabble club nights on Wednesdays (online at the moment). I'm looking forward to it! Hopefully the time won't drag so much now.

And for @wildflowerchild25 i got this on my rack:

I really don’t know what to do. Last night I filled my weekly med box. My ambian should have been 60 pills, brand new bottle. Was only 28 pills. Once you take the bottle from the store they assume it’s you. No doctor is going to call in a script 2 weeks early. I can take half my dosage and not sleep for a month or I can take my 1 1/2 a night semi sleep for two weeks then go into two weeks of withdrawals? My per scribed dosage is 2 a night. I usually take 2 Sunday night , 1 1/2 though the week which doesn’t work well but keeps me ok and let’s me take 2 1/2 on Wednesday and Saturday night so at least twice a week I sleep well. I’ve been taking ambian for about 8 years and have tolerance to it. But every time I’ve tried to quit I have horrible withdrawals. My clinic finally hired more pdoc so I have an appointment in March. So I can’t contact him. And my GP who has been writing my scripts I’ve met once and we disliked each other. Contacting him is out of the question too. The pharmacy is not going to admit to screwing up, it says 60 on the bottle. That’s what they’ll claim was in it.

@whatever2013
Ah I love it thanks for sharing!

Does anyone get breakthrough symptoms of mania and then get the sense the AP/mood stabilizer kicked in and took the edge off and kept things more-or-less in a safe range? I had a run of auditory hallucinations that lasted about a week or so along with a bit of that liveliness feeling, but it wasn't intense or anything and didn't annoy my wife overly much with me having to ask "did you call"/"whats up" kind of things. Then they just kinda faded away and are gone now.

I see my pdoc in a couple days and am trying to decide how to discuss it. It was very nebulous I guess, all kind of fuzzy and disorganized, even drank some wine for some reason, whereas I'm normally quite disinterested in adult beverages. I guess without the AP I'd probably be busily trying to wreck my life again.. lol.

Any thoughts about how to describe this better?

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Originally Posted by Nammu I really don’t know what to do. Last night I filled my weekly med box. My ambian should have been 60 pills, brand new bottle. Was only 28 pills. Once you take the bottle from the store they assume it’s you. No doctor is going to call in a script 2 weeks early. I can take half my dosage and not sleep for a month or I can take my 1 1/2 a night semi sleep for two weeks then go into two weeks of withdrawals? My per scribed dosage is 2 a night. I usually take 2 Sunday night , 1 1/2 though the week which doesn’t work well but keeps me ok and let’s me take 2 1/2 on Wednesday and Saturday night so at least twice a week I sleep well. I’ve been taking ambian for about 8 years and have tolerance to it. But every time I’ve tried to quit I have horrible withdrawals. My clinic finally hired more pdoc so I have an appointment in March. So I can’t contact him. And my GP who has been writing my scripts I’ve met once and we disliked each other. Contacting him is out of the question too. The pharmacy is not going to admit to screwing up, it says 60 on the bottle. That’s what they’ll claim was in it.

Oh, hun...you absolutely must contact the pharmacy. This mistake is on them and they need to take responsibility for it.

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Originally Posted by rwwff Does anyone get breakthrough symptoms of mania and then get the sense the AP/mood stabilizer kicked in and took the edge off and kept things more-or-less in a safe range? I had a run of auditory hallucinations that lasted about a week or so along with a bit of that liveliness feeling, but it wasn't intense or anything and didn't annoy my wife overly much with me having to ask "did you call"/"whats up" kind of things. Then they just kinda faded away and are gone now. I see my pdoc in a couple days and am trying to decide how to discuss it. It was very nebulous I guess, all kind of fuzzy and disorganized, even drank some wine for some reason, whereas I'm normally quite disinterested in adult beverages. I guess without the AP I'd probably be busily trying to wreck my life again.. lol. Any thoughts about how to describe this better?

You've described your experience well. I think the same explanation to your pdoc would be fine.

I agree with BethRags that you've explained the experience well.

Yes, I have had plenty of breakthrough hypomanic and even full manic symptoms in the past that were rapidly calmed by an antipsychotic. A number of (but not all) antipsychotics can really kick the butt out of my manic symptoms, especially when caught early.

Sometimes an issue for me is that my antipsychotic works fine maybe for 16 hours after taking it, but reduces efficacy after that point (poops out a bit), until I take more. Sometimes when that is frequent, my dose is slightly increased (at least temporarily). It may be added to my usual evening cocktail, or a little is added to my morning cocktail, leaving evening as is. My antipsychotic is Seroquel XR, which is extended release meant for once daily dosing. But even with extended release, I may need the twice per day dosing. Regular Seroquel is most often taken in divided morn/evening doses, as a norm.

Christina, how did your dental appointment go?

I’m here at my college for first night of class. Social work policy…fun, huh?

Had to get a Covid test first. Waiting on results so I can go to class.

Thanks for the reassurance, I'll just explain it like that and see what he makes of the experience.

I just came back from the dentist. I had not gone in 2 years. And after being out of work and just general depression I wasn't taking the best care of my teeth. Also I drink a lot of soda and I eat a lot of candy. But the dentist took a full set of xrays. Including the ones that go around your head. And he said my teeth look great. Theres one spot to look out for but just to brush it a lot. But he said things look great. I paid out of pocket for this guy and it was a high end place. I am pretty sure low income/medicaid/medicare dentists find stuff that are not actually there because they get paid more when they do more work. When I was seeing a low income dentist before I moved she was claiming I was getting 7 cavitiys every 6 months.

So that part is good. On the other hand, my gynecolgists RN got back to me today. She said it sounds like I may have an infection or atophy and would I mind coming in. So I'm going in Thursday. I am trying my hardest not to lose it anxiety wise. But I do not want to go in for another exam.

I always said I'd rather go to the dentist then the gyencolgist. Well I got/get to go to both.

No joke though I'm really nervous about it. She told me he had times open tommrow wednesday and thursday and I set it up for Thursday on purpose so I could discuss things with my therapist before the appointment.

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Originally Posted by Mountaindewed I just came back from the dentist. I had not gone in 2 years. And after being out of work and just general depression I wasn't taking the best care of my teeth. Also I drink a lot of soda and I eat a lot of candy. But the dentist took a full set of xrays. Including the ones that go around your head. And he said my teeth look great. Theres one spot to look out for but just to brush it a lot. But he said things look great. I paid out of pocket for this guy and it was a high end place. I am pretty sure low income/medicaid/medicare dentists find stuff that are not actually there because they get paid more when they do more work. When I was seeing a low income dentist before I moved she was claiming I was getting 7 cavitiys every 6 months. So that part is good. On the other hand, my gynecolgists RN got back to me today. She said it sounds like I may have an infection or atophy and would I mind coming in. So I'm going in Thursday. I am trying my hardest not to lose it anxiety wise. But I do not want to go in for another exam. I always said I'd rather go to the dentist then the gyencolgist. Well I got/get to go to both. No joke though I'm really nervous about it. She told me he had times open tommrow wednesday and thursday and I set it up for Thursday on purpose so I could discuss things with my therapist before the appointment.

Terrific news from the dentist! I'm so sorry you're anxious about the gyno appointment. I hope that talking with your therapist tomorrow will be of help to you, Md.

I had a migraine this morning right off the bat, so after checking for interactions I took my new migraine med. got rid of the headache which is awesome. But I got incredibly nauseous on the drive to work. I turned the heat off and opened the window even though it was only 30 degrees. It helped. As soon as I got to work my stomach settled down.

But then, as soon as I started driving home, my stomach started flip flopping again! Almost like motion sickness! I’ve never had motion sickness in my life! I stopped at the drugstore when I made it back to my town and grabbed some Dramamine to keep in the car.

12% of vraylar users get nausea as a side effect. I cannot deal with these stomach symptoms! I called my pdoc’s office and they sent her a message to call me tomorrow when she’s in. At least, they said they did. I know the front desk staff has a tendency to say they did things when they didn’t.

I just had dinner and I’m feeling a little nauseous again along with the stomach pain. Hopefully pdoc does call me tomorrow to advise me.

I've been getting overwhelmed with frustration, lately. It's taking a toll on me. I also feel more alone than I ever have in my entire life, despite my husband being constantly in the house. I'm in a state of entrapment. And despite this, I feel I must say "Farewell" as nothing is more painful (and unfair) than being alone in an environment where one shouldn't be.