Bipolar check-in #63

Meds came!!!!

Zelensky is apparently begging for help from the US in terms of air warfare. My mind is strongly denying it, yet there is also the "Are we about to enter a war?" thought.


I haven't felt this close to dying in a long time. What happens if my body just...stops.

Gas here is at $6.95/gallon for regular.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom Meds came!!!!

Oh, that is wonderful

My fear is that we will not help and the evil will spread.

Thinking of you. Sending hugs and healing vibes.

Thinking of you.

My thoughts exactly.

Feeling a bit sad and lonely tonight. I’m just waiting to go to sleep. Tomorrow I’ll get up early and head out to meet M. I’m looking forward to seeing her. That will cheer me up.

I hope everyone has a peaceful Sunday

I've had considerable time out of the ditch today.

USEFUL INFORMATION for anyone considering trying mirtazapine/Remeron. It was the only thing that helped me, somewhat, mainly by letting me sleep, back when I was just called "depressed." (Then the doc started saying Bipolar and added lamotrigine and I got my life back..)

Anyway, last night I increased my mirtazapine to the previous full dose--a little earlier than I had planned but the sleeplessness was just getting too bad. It knocked me out and I've been drowsy all day, even though it was a small increase. I had been splitting the 30 mg pills in half, then splitting some of the halves in half, to get a dose of about 22 mg (some gets lost as powder.) Just going from 22 to 30 restarted the intense drowsiness, like it was when I first started at 15 mg.

So whenever you start this OR increase the dose, be careful! Do not plan to drive!

Also, I laid down at about 5 pm to rest a little and fell asleep, and when I woke up I had that sleep paralysis or whatever you call it, when you're partially awake but can't move. Kinda scary at the time--"what, did I have a stroke or something?"--but apparently harmless. I thought it went on for 15 minutes or more but I don't think so, since when I finally could move, only 20 minutes had passed since I laid down. So if you ever do take it, be prepared for that and if it happens try not to worry.

I haven't seen many people on here taking mirtazapine which I think is unfortunate when so many have sleep problems. It's really quite good for that and for depression.

It's good to see you so much happier today.

@BethRags

Surely this will get resolved and you'll be in a better state. Can't happen too soon!

What a bummer about the doctor. But you went on with your day and made something good out of it.

That's just awful. That ought to be changed.

@Mountaindewed

Sounds like you handled the family gathering yesterday very well. Congrats!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nammu My fear is that we will not help and the evil will spread.

Yes, I fear that, too. In a way I feel like we should intervene now, rather than waiting until God knows what.

Beth sending good vibes!

dear beth, I am confused. If her blood sugars are dropping then the insulin would make her blood sugars drop even more. bizi

TMI WARNING...

So it's been a weird last couple of days. Thursday, I got my IUD out. Started spotting the same day. Then yesterday and today it was all old brown blood. I looked online and it said you can have spotting after the Mirena- the IUD with progesterone- is taken out. Today, the brown bleeding got so bad that I needed a pad. Then today it changed over to bright red in the toilet and on the toilet paper! I thought my doctor must've done something very wrong on Thursday! There were even large clots! Good thing I had some pads for who knows what reason since it had been years since I'd had a period. So fearing something was wrong with me because Google told me that it's normal to spot after IUD removal but to call your doctor if you have clotting! So I called the on call service at my ob/gyn's office. I called 3 times and they were paged twice and the doctor never called back! Then finally they paged another doctor who called back quickly. We had such a great conversation. Turns out I am just having a withdrawal period from getting my progesterone-containing IUD out! All that concern for nothing. She said if my periods are heavy we can put in another IUD but I'd rather not unless I bleed a lot. So far this seems like a normal period. It had been since 2014 at least since I'd gotten the IUD so at least that long since I'd had a period and I had another of the same kind before it too so needless to say having a period has been foreign to me - until today that is! At least I know I'm not in menopause yet!

Now I just talked with the on-call ob/gyn again. I'm soaking through a pad an hour- you can see the blood on the underside- with several large clots. She wants me to be evaluated in the ER but I asked if I can wait and see if I soak another pad that fast. She agreed.

Welp...I'm pretty sure I just soaked the second one too. Damn it!

@Moose72, that sounds quite worrisome. I hope the bleeding eases soon. Do take care. I had troubles with my past IUD, but mine was not Mirena. I had (I forget the name) the copper IUD. I eventually needed it out for a few reasons.

Quote:

Originally Posted by bizi dear beth, I am confused. If her blood sugars are dropping then the insulin would make her blood sugars drop even more. bizi

You're absolutely correct, bizi. The thing is, with Lantus (the insulin Sidney is on) there has to be at least a tiny dose given, otherwise she'll bounce way up - then way down to compensate. The trick is to keep her as stable as possible. The stability is what we've been having such a hard time with this month.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Moose72 TMI WARNING... So it's been a weird last couple of days. Thursday, I got my IUD out. Started spotting the same day. Then yesterday and today it was all old brown blood. I looked online and it said you can have spotting after the Mirena- the IUD with progesterone- is taken out. Today, the brown bleeding got so bad that I needed a pad. Then today it changed over to bright red in the toilet and on the toilet paper! I thought my doctor must've done something very wrong on Thursday! There were even large clots! Good thing I had some pads for who knows what reason since it had been years since I'd had a period. So fearing something was wrong with me because Google told me that it's normal to spot after IUD removal but to call your doctor if you have clotting! So I called the on call service at my ob/gyn's office. I called 3 times and they were paged twice and the doctor never called back! Then finally they paged another doctor who called back quickly. We had such a great conversation. Turns out I am just having a withdrawal period from getting my progesterone-containing IUD out! All that concern for nothing. She said if my periods are heavy we can put in another IUD but I'd rather not unless I bleed a lot. So far this seems like a normal period. It had been since 2014 at least since I'd gotten the IUD so at least that long since I'd had a period and I had another of the same kind before it too so needless to say having a period has been foreign to me - until today that is! At least I know I'm not in menopause yet! Now I just talked with the on-call ob/gyn again. I'm soaking through a pad an hour- you can see the blood on the underside- with several large clots. She wants me to be evaluated in the ER but I asked if I can wait and see if I soak another pad that fast. She agreed. Welp...I'm pretty sure I just soaked the second one too. Damn it!

Oh, honey....please get checked out. Keep us posted

Oh, please, I am so tired. I've been in touch with the emergency vet tech and with the feline diabetes group. This has been (and maybe still is) one of the hardest days of my life. SIdney's glucose numbers went up into a stable place for a few hours (honey helped), but at last reading she had dropped a bit. Going to do another reading in a few minutes. If she's stable, we'll wait 45 minutes and test again. If her number is down...this could be many hours, or all night. I'm doing my best to breath and remain grounded. I am praying for good numbers and some sleep.

Love all around

I hope you get good numbers for Sidney and that you get some good rest. Yes, doing your best to breathe and remain grounded is important. Thinking of you.

I’m supposed to meet my daughter halfway to visit this morning. I don’t want to go. I’m in pain. I’d rather sit on the couch, pop some pills and sleep. I won’t do that though. It’s not in the best interest of my healing. I will drag myself up and out and I’ll feel better for it. May be in tears but I’ll do it.

I was good friends with this guy for a year and then when the relationship became more we were wrapped up in each other for hours and hours a day. Everyone and everything else took a back seat. I can see now that 14-17 hours a day wrapped up in someone is not normal. When I broke off the relationship, I lost my best friend as well. I know none of it was healthy. My heart just hasn’t received the memo yet and I feel things too deeply anyway. If I had to do it over again would I? That’s a hard call. I really, really loved the guy and didn’t realize how twisted he was until the end.

One great thing to come out of this is that my sister and I are talking and she has been very supportive. We’re planning things to do together.

I’ve researched the top 10 dating websites of 2022. I’m not ready yet but when I am, I’ll put myself out there. In the meantime, I will work on why I’m always trying to fix and keep attracting unhealthy guys. I suspect it’s low self worth.

I’m processing things in a healthy manner and healing at a good pace. It will just take time.

I hope everybody has a peaceful Sunday. Hugs to all

It’s about $2 a litre here. Don’t know how that compares.