Bipolar Check-in #72

Wishing relief, respite and recovery for your mother @Nammu !

@Nammu, I'm sad to read that your mom is back in the hospital again. I hope she gets past this next bout of pneumonia quickly. Hugs

@Miguel'smom, sending you positive wishes that you can get the medication issue resolved soon. I do think it's good that you are clearly aware of what's going on with your moods. It does suck, but it will pass. Please stay as strong as you can be.

@Aurelius710, I hope you get to see an ENT soon.

I had a dream that I was walking into my 1st grade classroom and the moment I stepped inside I could literally smell that grade-school classroom scent of wooden pencils, crayons, and paper. The scent was so powerful it woke me up. I wish I could go there right now and look at that classroom.

I’ve actually been sleeping better the last few days. Last week I went down on my ambien and cut it in half. That and yesterdays aqua fitness all have helped the regular dose work better. I do fall asleep fairly quickly but wake up too early.

6 hrs is better than 4! Last night I had an intense dream of saving homeless kids. Had to solve lists and rhymes. Was a competition between mme and a shadowy person. Don’t know why we couldn’t have worked together. I was in the middle of transcribing a list when the dream started breaking up around me and I was like, no, no I must finish this. Of course by the time I woke up the list had completely vanished.

I am now fairly sure that I have a UTI. It was quite suspected by my nephrologist. Bad thing is that I was supposed to get tested just over a week ago, but I at first forgot about it and then when I remembered, just put it off. I know it's bad for my kidneys, so I will try to get it done asap. I'm just feeling less and less capable of keeping up with things. My husband feels similar. I know that sometimes the bare necessities are enough, but now I've got to push again to do even more.

Tomorrow I go for a blood test to a new endocrinologist. I don't expect her to find anything beyond maybe a slightly low functioning thyroid. Sure hope that's it. I then see her for the full exam next week. I've had so many urine tests, blood tests, ultrasounds, and other tests these past couple months. I will bring some of the results that I got, including the 2-hour glucose tolerance one, but it seems every doctor likes to test this stuff on their own. Sick of the duplications! In the US, my GP prescribed my thyroid med. Even in Brno the GP did. In Prague the GP we're seeing is a fairly young woman who seems to like referring patients to specialists, left and right. We may just try to look for an older GP. On March 11, 2017 I wrote a blog post entitled "Too many physician specialists! Cutting down the list." Well, I'm back there again.

Sorry I keep harping on this stuff. It's wearing me down down down!

Oh, Soupe! I’m sure this will get better once you’re in your house and settled. But do get the uti handled immediately.

Thanks, Nammu. And I know the UTI is serious. Actually, Hubby just saw online that the pharmacies here have an OTC UTI test. We'll buy it and do it tomorrow. If it shows as so, we'll call the GP and see if she'll prescribe something. If she won't, maybe a local urgent care center will. There is a local urgent care just in the next village.

I have my Czech class tonight in 25 mins. I'm so on the verge of tears. But I will push myself. Luckily it's an online class and there are seven students, so I won't have to do that much talking as I did when in a class of only three.

I do not want to go to work. But I need the money. Currently I am making enough to place me right at the limit allowed by SSDI. It looks like I will have to reduce the number of hours I work. I will check with SS. Blasted depression!

I'm stressed out with damn phone issues this morning, wouldn't let me access my voicemail. Finally the IP fixed it. Ugggh.

My little alarm clock has gone wonky. so I purchased a new cute tiny lavender-colored one.

I ordered boba tea. Lychee. It's on its way.

IOP program is pushed back another month to gain more traction for people to join. Until then I will meet with my therapist twice a week. Finished my functional report for my appeal and faxed that back. Just trying to get through the days.

Used to love boba tea but then, oddly one day I couldn’t drink it any more? just outa the blue.

Hey !!

Nammu I’m so sorry Mum is back in the hospital. Pneumonia is pretty common unfortunately I am so glad your getting some good sleep. Hope you have more awesome dreams I really enjoy hearing about them.

Soupe .. oaf I am sorry you might have a UTI hope the GP will order antibiotic outside of a office visit. Go here go there stuff see one Doctor after another is in my opinion stupid. I really hope that you will get through these and not have appts coming at you left and right. Glad you and hubby had a nice day out.

Miguel’s mom .. as others have said you really need to focus and push to get medications that you really need. It’s time for all 3 of you to get the medical care needed and enjoy life more your husband and Miguel. You guys are so due for some good stuff.

Beth . That dream sounds amazing. I think the only time I enjoyed school and wasn’t bullied was up to 4th grade I think. Those smells were comforting. As for your telling Mary about your doing your own increase? Her not being thrilled is really in her “job description “ it’s common and I think all of us have tinkered with our meds at some point so I’d honestly not be bothered by it. Hopefully you will get the go ahead to increase with appt with your Doctor. Ooooo now I want a tea lol

Muddy I know I’m wicked late asking about that horrid cold you went through. I can not even imagine those temps.. nope nope nope.


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Well day 2 off Rinvoq and I defiantly feel more pressure / pain in my joints so the Rinvoq was working. I see my Rheumatologist next week so he will figure out something else. I’m really just angry that my medication plan is no longer covering Xeljanz .. it was working well with no side effects.

Last night I had another night of alerts of 130’s heart rate. Very stress inducing certainly. This evening I’m running 115 and below with just a few runs of 130. So improvement. I’m hoping my heart rate will further stabilize back into 70’s - low 80’s.

I’m wearing shorts ! Unusual warm day ! I am so ready for Spring ! Bring on my horrible allergies but I will be warm at least !

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So the receptionist basically called me a liar that she's got no notes and they don't do prior authorization through the pharmacy. The pharmacy hasn't talked to my Dr. when I know they have. So it can take two weeks from today. So I cried when I got off the phone. I'll see her tomorrow so who knows how she'll react. I know she's upset because I'm almost out of meds but I've been dealing with it through the pharmacy. Not knowing they have their own pre-authorization team.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom So the receptionist basically called me a liar that she's got no notes and they don't do prior authorization through the pharmacy. The pharmacy hasn't talked to my Dr. when I know they have. So it can take two weeks from today. So I cried when I got off the phone. I'll see her tomorrow so who knows how she'll react. I know she's upset because I'm almost out of meds but I've been dealing with it through the pharmacy. Not knowing they have their own pre-authorization team.

I'm so sorry, Mm. I've had the same sh-it kind of irritating day.

Can't your doctor do some kind of over-ride for the Xeljanz, @~Christina? It just seems so terribly wrong that you cannot obtain a med that was truly helping you. Some doctors have to be "reminded" of the option (which requires paperwork on their part).

I had a frustrating, confusing day yesterday and I'm trying not to allow it to carry over into today, but I'm already obsessing over things. It's always the same story with my therapist. Just when things feel like they're really cruising she says something that hurts my feelings so badly, I just want to stop seeing her. Yet, I know I am a hyper-sensitive person, sensitive to others feelings as well as my own. So I suppose the wisest way to proceed is to go to my session and work on the way I feel. Buuut, I constantly ask myself Is it me or is it her? Because it feels like she gives so many double standards, making it difficult for me to feel really secure.

Now she says she wants us to watch a video tomorrow. Oh, wow, I'm feeling annoyed already. (I hope it's not @Mountaindewed's poodle video )

Mum is not doing well. She’s had a physical set back. The doctor said it could be the antibiotics as they are very strong. Her tentative discharge is now Friday.

New here, thank you to all for reading and commenting and just for being here. Had a pretty serious episode over the weekend, finally starting to come out of it. Today I was able to do a lot of reading and make a plan for myself moving forward to help manage and mitigate for the future. Joining here is part of that plan!

So I am feeling optimistic and hopeful about living with bipolar, even though it is awful and I wouldn't wish it on anyone - well, maybe only a couple of people

I emailed my therapist this morning about food related stuff. And she got back this afternoon and mentioned the poodle again. It was the first time all week I actually laughed.

So insurance can't locate the Dr or script. No prior authorization or anything. They said find a new Dr to prescribe and do the prior authorization. At this point I don't know what to do.

Welcome @ronkuby !

thank you!!!

always nice to have new people.

@ronkuby Welcome!

Glad you joined us here, @ronkuby. Welcome! Hopefully you will continue your mood stabilization. Your planning steps are a great idea. And you should feel optimistic. Bipolar disorder can suck, but it can be tamed.