4) You know you are Borderline when...

I know I belong here. I was given the DX a very long time ago and then three others changed it to PTSD, Major Depression, recurrent, and Panic DO.
But this stuff I really get.
I am out of a job, my own damn fault, down to nickels and dimes and my timing couldn't be worse---
and of course everyone hates me,
the only reason i don't self harm is because then "they" will "know"...and they are not allowed to know about me.
oh yeah, and now i am too old to start.

...you constantly ask yourself if your friend/family member/co-worker is mad at you.

and I've done this twice in less than 24 hours. I need to get a grip, I hate myself.

...you feel like jumping out of the car, rather than continue to ride with the aggravating driver.

You know you are completely alone today as you will be for the rest of your life.

When you drop everything and sit in from of the computer hoping that you can read some mindfulness stuff and do an online guided meditation and hope that it helps with your over-the-top anxiety that continues to build for no reason other than your mind won't stop....

......and it doesn't work...numbness, disassociation settles in instead. I tried...better than anxiety.

You are not alone. We may be "virtual" but we are still your friends. We understand the pain and desperation that BPD can bring as well as the feeling of being completely alone and empty. It's very, very hard...I know this, but take some comfort that you're not alone and there's others who do understand.

I've made a few requests. Do you think they take them seriously? I'm still here.

You try to give your cat a pill to help it and end up wanting to strangle it instead.

You know you're borderline when you're shaking with rage and about to throw things, and then you feel fine, then you're panicking, then you're happy and motivated, then so depressed that you want to disappear, then you feel empty, then you're so bored that you could scream in frustration... all in less than a few hours...

For whatever reason, it takes a week to two weeks to have a request granted....provided you don't change your mind between then. I don't know why other than they seem to wait until they have a stack of them to do before they do them. I do know that from the most recent "batch", I lost three friends.

Do that all the time.....at least several times a week.

When you say you're lonely and your friend is quiet and says she's tired from traveling and you say "Sorry, I won't talk to you again."

When you have a dream that your family finally finds out about your MI, and your sister tells you she's "afraid of your mind." And the rest of the family treats you worse than before.

Kinda going through this phase, try to cry but can't and don't really see the point.

Gosh, this happens to me all the time.

GOSH YEAH... I believe there's always an ulterior motive.

It's honestly I feel most of the time, like I'm acting or have to be somebody I'm not for people to like me.

Definitely...

Happened with my very first thread.

oh yeah!!

When, no matter how hard you try, you start splitting people you care about in your mind, turning them in to dog meat, and even though you know better, you can't stop it.

I get very sad, upset and very angry when things don't go MY way.

All the time.

I can never get enough. I only want more more more more.....