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#1
Sep 27, 2014, 11:23 PM
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I have BPD but also moderate to severe major depressive disorder, and tonight I just feel as though I can't hang on. I wonder if I'm making it a bigger deal than it really is, though.... I know I have a history of "wanting" to be depressed but I'm really feeling it tonight. I want to keep fighting, to be happy and independent, but I am so tired of fighting. Been fighting for 18 years now and I don't know how long I can keep going. I guess I just need someone to understand that I am weak, that I absolutely CANNOT fight this anymore. That I am incapable of dealing right now. But of course, tomorrow will probably be a different story. Sad, I was in DBT off and on for four years and I did really well with it, but now I can't seem to recall a single skill to use. I'm just tired of not giving up. I'm weary and jaded and I just don't want to fight anymore. But I suppose I HAVE to....otherwise, where would I be if I didn't? I just need someone who cares and no one I know is available to talk or willing to listen.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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It's not who you are who holds you back; it's what you think you're not.   Borderline Personality Disorder, Major Depressive Disorder, Bipolar Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder |
 anon111614, bluekoi, celtic.starlite, Espresso, shezbut, XSleepingSiren21X
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#2
Sep 28, 2014, 10:55 AM
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emmaleewhispers,
 Sounds like DBT was helpful before. Can you go back to therapy to refresh your coping skills? 
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 emmaleewhispers
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#3
Sep 28, 2014, 10:59 AM
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Quote:
I am currently going through a lot of financial problems and can't afford even a talk therapist, let alone DBT group. But I will look and see if I can find one that is free or low cost in my community. Thanks so much for your response. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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It's not who you are who holds you back; it's what you think you're not. Borderline Personality Disorder, Major Depressive Disorder, Bipolar Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder |
| bluekoi, shezbut
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| bluekoi
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#4
Sep 29, 2014, 11:35 PM
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I am sorry that you're feeling stuck and miserable.
 I can relate a lot with how your mind and emotions are working ~ up a little, down a lot, up a little, hard knock down, the list goes on...Have you tried getting some county assistance? If that isn't an option for you: Lots of psychiatric offices do offer sliding fee scales, and that really helps! DBT can be especially helpful. You could go onto the website to refresh your memory. DBT Self Help Gentle hugs and best wishes to you. 
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"Only in the darkness can you see the stars." - Martin Luther King Jr. "Forgive others not because they deserve forgiveness but because you deserve peace." - Author Unkown |
| emmaleewhispers
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#5
Sep 30, 2014, 12:30 PM
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I wish I had the right words for you right now. You have been there for me the last couple of days and I want you to know that I'm always willing to listen. I'm sorry you're going through this rough patch right now. Please keep fighting. Big hugs!!
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| emmaleewhispers
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| Reply |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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