Crying every day for years - anyone have answers ?

I literally have been crying every day for years. I don't remember the last day I didn't cry. I have done about 15 years of counseling/therapy. I am on 150 mg of Effexor. I often cry 2 hours a day. The emotional pain is there at the surface when I wake up every morning. Its like my body releases pain during the night and in the morning - boom - there it is. I feel like I have no choice but to work thru the pain because its often so overwhelming. I am trying to heal from a very bad childhood but cannot get any relief from the pain - anyone have any thoughts or suggestions ?

This to me sounds like something that would be good to work through with professional support. I'm not sure if you've already got a therapist or someone similar but that'd be a good place to start. And if you feel comfortable and would like to to open up more about your childhood or anything else you think is causing your pain you are very welcome to do so on this website. I know that for me at least I find it very therapeutic to open up to the community on this site There's lots of loving and caring people here that will listen. I hope you can find relief.

Could it be time to try a different antidepressant? Just a thought. Hang in there, and please keep posting.

I have tried Prozac, Lexapro, Wellbutrin and Zoloft but none of those seemed to work for me. I am going to try and go to a higher dose of Effexor to see if that will help. I have been in therapy for 15 years. Different therapists - none of them had an answer as to how to relieve the pain. I have probably seen a dozen different therapists over the 15 year period - desperately trying to find someone who can help me figure out the cause/root of the pain. there was a lot of childhood abuse but there is nothing that I haven't disclosed. I am pretty open about what happened. There was sexual abuse and a lot of emotional and verbal abuse - almost daily. I stayed outside a lot or in my room to try and avoid the abuse as much as possible. I had nowhere to turn for help or support. There was no one else around who knew what was going on. I was scared a lot. I often didn't know what to do because of all the chaos at home. So I would hide or go outside. I never had anyone to talk to about what was going on. I didn't get any help until I was in my mid 20's. I am 50 now. I lost a lot of my childhood. I didn't realize how bad it was. I didn't understand. No one ever explained anything to me. I never had anywhere to turn for support or help. I never had anyone to open up to. I will share anything if someone will listen but I hardly have anyone in my life willing to do that...no one wants to hear stories about people's abuse especially if I have already mentioned it to them. They don't want to hear about it anymore. I am married but have no other family to turn to for support. I just want to get better.

>no one wants to hear stories about people's abuse especially if I have already mentioned it to them

Wow, it sounds like people hear the content, but you never feel really deeply heard. You don't feel any empathy coming your way. Is that right?

If that's so, I'm sorry. I feel punched in the gut that you are stuck in this and cry every day for 15 years. I've cried a lot, too. I'm "reparenting" or learning to give myself love I never got, and I'm to a stage where meditation helps, but my very loving husband who is willing to hear me really helps, too.

Is there no one who will really hear you? No groups for people who have suffered as you have? What does your therapist say about this problem? It sounds like you need a lot. I find it helps to move to present and future from past, but I also know that past can be quite invasive. I'm glad I'm starting to be able to let it go, but it keeps coming back. It sounds like that is happening for you, as the past plagues you and leaves you in tears and helpless. Maybe you can be heard on this board. There are many people who have suffered CSB here, and areas where it's discussed.

You sound like you done Much Healing, and that alone is some thing to be proud of. The crying you do is Normal and good. You are aware of the feelings. Keep working on letting the past and its hurts go now. The crying is also the process off letting go your past trauma and pain. There will be much Pain associated with that letting go. For it is like losing and old friend.

Yes, sometimes crying is this, and sometimes it is excessive dwelling in the past. I don't know what it is for the original poster. Only she can say if it the wound is healing or festering.

i didn't find that therapy or meds were helpful either. i ended up going to the 12-step group adult children of alcoholics. it isn't just for alcoholic families (mine wasn't) and sharing and listening to others share really helped me a lot.

yes, i very much agree with this. OP, do you feel better after you cry, like a burden has been released? if not, i think it is possible you may be crying more out of despair rather than working through your issues. only you would know which it is though.

Awe, sorry to hear about this, sounds like you had a bad past that caused this? You could be partially just very sensitive as well just like me, but yeah, if you have to, you can always seek therapy if it gets out of hand. And you can always message me if you ever want to talk.

Hi,

Write your story

Cry your eyes out. Take as much time as you need to do this.

When you are done , put it in a box and store it somewhere. Get some therapy and do the EDMR, for the stuff you can't get over.

I wish you many hopes and dreams in your future. Be strong
Happy holidays