[EdgyUsername]

Almost every friend I've ever had, I've always gotten to a point where I just suddenly feel as if I'm not wanted around them anymore...

It's excruciating, It happens without warning, I start to get emotional and feel as if I don't fit into the equation, or I never did, I've just been fooling myself, I don't really have a purpose being in peoples lives, nor do I have the right to have any emotional attachment to them. they have/deserve friends better than me. I'm not needed, I'm just there.

I get depressed about it, contemplate suicide, and then realize I'm too afraid to actually do anything.

I just want to be at peace with something for once.

Intrusive thoughts haven't been very common with me recently, but right now I'm being bombarded.

I've lost so many close friends to this, I lose all my confidence when talking to them and eventually we just drift away....

Why do I have to be like this.
I just want to sit here and cry.

[CANDC]

Hi there. Glad you are here at Psych Central. Sorry you are suffering from multiple challenges. Psych Central helps people feel safe in sharing their story. Have you tried the Chat room to see if you feel comfortable there?

Some people who have been through this find a therapist (talk) or a psychiatrist (meds) can help show the way out of their maze of confusing thoughts.

Glad you are part of our community. There are a lot of caring people here. Besides being an active participant in helping oneself at Psych Cental, many people also help support each other by replying to other people's posts. Many people who are actively involved in Psych Central find it helps take them out of their own problems to develop empathy for others. And their problems are more manageable the more they help others.

Many people here at PC find they can share these feelings and what they are going through with the confidence that people go through similar things and can empathize. So many forums are offered as well as Chatrooms (after you have 5 posts or comments on others posts). Depression chat meets on Thursday night at 9pm EST and Anxiety Friday at 8PM. This is a great way to meet people just as much as the forums.

You can also be an active member in other ways like supporting others in their questions, reading articles and posts http://forums.psychcentral.com that are applicable to your area of concern.

Please feel free to private message me or any of the Community Liaisons by left clicking on the name in blue to the left of their post) for questions or just to share.

[BlossomingLen]

Hello there, it's a pleasure to meet you!

I know I can't understand how you feel completely, it's never that easy. But I do somewhat relate. I made a lot of friends, yet when I really look at my interactions with them or I look at their interactions with others; it makes me wonder. Sometimes I really lack the enthusiasm to talk and I end up leaving for awhile, only to come back and see that they've forgotten about me. I try my hardest to be social and make friends, even though they often fall out of my life. I seek comfort in just trying to support others, instead.

Perhaps, it could be somewhat comforting knowing that you're not alone in that kind of situation? I have yet to make any actual friends here, though I have definitely tried. It's just difficult on this site, and on the internet in general, to find a friend that's around your age and on the same page as you. So when you befriend people often out of that realm, miscommunication might happen, or some kind of feeling of inferiority. I have social anxiety, I'm an introvert, and I never really socialize with people face-to-face. So the internet's all I've really got. So I guess there's always a sort of disconnection there, even though I really wish there wasn't.

Basically, I can relate. I'm really sorry that you're going through this right now, and I know it must be really difficult for you. I really hope you can make it out of it, and I wish you the best of luck! If you ever need help or want to talk about it, feel free to send me a private message. I'll be cheering for you!

Have a wonderful day.

[EdgyUsername]

Originally Posted by BlossomingLen

Hello there, it's a pleasure to meet you!

I know I can't understand how you feel completely, it's never that easy. But I do somewhat relate. I made a lot of friends, yet when I really look at my interactions with them or I look at their interactions with others; it makes me wonder. Sometimes I really lack the enthusiasm to talk and I end up leaving for awhile, only to come back and see that they've forgotten about me. I try my hardest to be social and make friends, even though they often fall out of my life. I seek comfort in just trying to support others, instead.

Perhaps, it could be somewhat comforting knowing that you're not alone in that kind of situation? I have yet to make any actual friends here, though I have definitely tried. It's just difficult on this site, and on the internet in general, to find a friend that's around your age and on the same page as you. So when you befriend people often out of that realm, miscommunication might happen, or some kind of feeling of inferiority. I have social anxiety, I'm an introvert, and I never really socialize with people face-to-face. So the internet's all I've really got. So I guess there's always a sort of disconnection there, even though I really wish there wasn't.

Basically, I can relate. I'm really sorry that you're going through this right now, and I know it must be really difficult for you. I really hope you can make it out of it, and I wish you the best of luck! If you ever need help or want to talk about it, feel free to send me a private message. I'll be cheering for you!

Have a wonderful day.

I can actually empathize a lot with that

We seem to have a bit in common actually (Voice Acting/Anime/Anxiety..although that's probably not the most amazing bonding topic)

I'd be happy to talk to you at some point, I'm not amazingly great at starting conversations...as you can probably expect from someone who doesn't go outside...but who knows. maybe we find something we both can't shut up about.

Is it something you feel and act on it, or something really happens? It's difficult to judge from your rather general and vague post.

[Artchic528]

Hi!

I just wanted to say I have a similar experience to what you describe when I'm talking to people or trying to make friends. It feels as though I am not as into what the other person or people are into, and therefor, I am not part of that social group. Like I am not enough of a fan to really relate to them well.

For example, I enjoy anime and manga, but when I go out to join up with my local anime and manga meetup group, it feels like they are all die hard fans and have seen many different shows, and I'm just a casual viewer and only have a few shows that I've watched. I therefore don't feel like I'm enough of a fan to really belong in their group, and I begin to grow more and more quiet and just go off in my own world. That's why I rarely go to meetups anymore.

I know it's probably just my own skewed perceptions, but it feels nice knowing I'm not alone in feeling things like this. I don't really know how to overcome this way of perceiving social situations, so I can't offer any advice, but I can offer my moral support and empathy.

[EdgyUsername]

Originally Posted by Wandering Soul

Is it something you feel and act on it, or something really happens? It's difficult to judge from your rather general and vague post.

It's a feeling, Sort of a wave of intrusive thoughts.
in turn i feel like i'm not wanted and distance myself.
sometimes the very close people can get me back before it gets too far, but it still worrys me that one day they won't be able to.

Originally Posted by EdgyUsername

It's a feeling, Sort of a wave of intrusive thoughts.
in turn i feel like i'm not wanted and distance myself.
sometimes the very close people can get me back before it gets too far, but it still worrys me that one day they won't be able to.

Thanks for being honest. Our feelings aren't validation of realities. I face the same problem, so I've ended up alone and lonely. I don't wish that for you. If you have friends, try to stay friends with them and clarify the misunderstandings. Good luck

[SearchingforMe]

Originally Posted by EdgyUsername

It's a feeling, Sort of a wave of intrusive thoughts.
in turn i feel like i'm not wanted and distance myself.
sometimes the very close people can get me back before it gets too far, but it still worrys me that one day they won't be able to.

Dear Edgy,
Hi, I suffer from this, too. I start to feel like other people do not really like me, that they treat other friends differently than me, and that really I am just weird, or uninteresting, or whatever lies my depression tries to tell me, when I am down. Or I feel anxious about the friendship, like I am somehow too immature ( even though I am 48)to be in this friendship, or too awkward.....and I start to back away and eventually I am alone besides one or two friends. Again.

I also back away from family members. Sometimes I just stop being able to interact because I am depressed and hiding, then I find that they are busy with other people that have been around.

I know it isn't exactly the same, my reasons might be different from yours, or they might be the same......either way, it doesn't feel good to deal with those kind of feelings, or to feel isolated from your friends. Or even to lose relationships because of negative thoughts, or a poor self esteem. I think your post helps me, too, because I forget between times that I can do this to myself. And that, just like you are aware, they are negative feelings, they are not truth.

I wonder if it would be helpful to list good times you have had with each friend and ways they are kind or friendly to you, during those times when you are NOT feeling negative about your relationship, then read those notes when you are feeling bad about things?
Take Care,
Searching

you're a good friend to me, and I'm not going anywhere.

[Sheeba Khan]

Hi friend,

It happens with me too. I also take things too emotionally and think deep.

Basically highly sensitive people are deep thinkers. They create a situation which might actually not be there sometimes. And sometimes they are able to read the wrong intentions very soon due to which they are not able to connect with the same person. Thereafter feel un wanted in their life.

See my friend, I am not exactly sure if you are highly sensitive. But if you are, the quality is a boon and curse simultaneously. Even i am not been able to figure out a right way to fit in the society. May god bless us all.

[DarknessForever]

I know exactly what you mean when you talk about this kind of this. I never really had friends. The first friend I made was in the eighth grade, and I ended up distancing from her and left the friendship. In an email. Because I was so sad and I just couldn't handle it. I felt that she was ignoring me. Maybe it was an excuse. But I haven't talked to her since, and it had been two years. I have some new friends now, or what I consider friends, but I always have thoughts about it nor being real, that they hate me or think I'm stupid, or will leave me. Forget me. I'm afraid of leaving. So you are not alone. This community is here to help! We are here for you, and you are not alone. Don'the ever forget that!

[miss_useless]

Originally Posted by EdgyUsername

Almost every friend I've ever had, I've always gotten to a point where I just suddenly feel as if I'm not wanted around them anymore...

It's excruciating, It happens without warning, I start to get emotional and feel as if I don't fit into the equation, or I never did, I've just been fooling myself, I don't really have a purpose being in peoples lives, nor do I have the right to have any emotional attachment to them. they have/deserve friends better than me. I'm not needed, I'm just there.

I get depressed about it, contemplate suicide, and then realize I'm too afraid to actually do anything.

I can relate to a lot of this, I only had friends at school but they would never met up with me outside of school even though they would regularly meet up with others in the group, I put it down to not being able to put myself out there because I don't quite fit in a certain group and not being able say something interesting. I did have some oppurtunities with people who liked anime/manga or similar music to me but I'm not a hardcore fan and even though we lived close to each other I couldn't take the relationship outside of school so when I left school all my friendships died but I always felt like a spare part and a burden.

[The Fiction]

I can relate, what you described is characteristic for people suffering with mental health issues. I hope you find a place where you "belong"...after all it's all up to you and it's all a part of your own subjective perception. Remember that you need to feel good and confident enough to feel like you can choose to belong. Because that it is...a matter of choice. Only if you feel like you don't deserve to belong, you choose not to.

You hold a special place in peoples hearts Sweetheart, it's those people who will remain in your life when the others leave. I know it's a painful experience to go through, you've lost a friend and your trust. Please remember, not everyone is going to let you down.