Emotions on Meds?

My therapist was also a psychologist (a doctoral degree rather than a master's degree where she did supervised internships and research) so I had the impression she could diagnose but could not prescribe.

All my meds were prescribed by a psychiatrist due to a diagnosis of anxiety, panic disorder and depression. I was very naive until my attempt and just took what they prescribed without questioning it (I have never asked for a particular medication--only to have dosages lowered) or understanding that any of it was habit forming or would be dangerous to stop. I now look at the warning lablels and side effects more closely whenever I am prescribed anything. I also have a diagnosis of bipolar 2 currently in full remission--I have never seen where a psychiatrist said in my records that I have active bipolar 2 , which seems a little weird.

Can't say that I fully understand what has gone on with me even though I have seen 4 psychiatrists who have all given me an anxiety and depression diagnosis. My fourth psychiatrist who I trust the most because she actually takes the time to talk to me (all the previous psychiatrists had 10 minute appointments where they just prescibed based on what they decided during my very first appointment with them where I answered a set of standard questions about my history). She added to the diagnoses panic disorder and bipolar 2 in remission. She adjusted some of the medications I was given and added one so that they seem to be helping more. The Bupropion dose I had been put on by all my previous psychiatrists was doing more harm than good. Perhaps it caused me to have a temporary case of Bipolar 2 then when I had to stop it cold turkey--it once again caused more harm than good? Based on my experiences with psychiatrists, I have trouble feeling like diagnoses are always accurate. How can they know if they never spend any time talking to you? I guess we just feel differently about some of this yet agree on other things. I do think that psych meds are helpful but also sometimes cause harm because it is harder to know what is going on in our brains than with some of the physical conditions where there are definitive tests.

I started taking meds only at 30+ after a difficult life
I was ignorant about my own condition(first violent crisis at 16) and skeptical/afraid of meds
My family didn't know too -they had problems themeselves and never get treated
I blame myself for the disasaster of the last 10 years of my life (almost)-my twenties

Turned out I do need medications (small doses)
Now I almost envy who took them when Young... they had someone who looked after and took charge of their problems

I think it's not easy to answer your question
Science could do it

I agree, it seems all therapists now want to say my diagnosis is anxiety. The words depression and trauma are used by them. They say there is resistance to diagnose anything more specific and that the DSM will change soon. Will they simply call everything anxiety now?

I’ve been seeking relationship and emotional help (for how it affects me) for 20+ years now. In the past one psychiatrist wrote in her notes and did not tell me until I went back to her 7 years later that I was EDD. Another spoke to me once and yelled at me that I have MDD. So that’s all I’ve been told and doctors have just thrown darts at a board of ‘here, try this’ with meds. I have posed the question with all of them as to if I am the one with a disorder which is why I have a few interpersonal relationships that went very bad, or are they such A holes? The only one who said ‘You just aren’t happy with your husband and you should divorce him’, that’s the same one who diagnosed me EDD behind my back and did not tell me...until I went back 7 years later! The others never set this question straight. When they hear anything about strained interpersonal relationships right away they think it’s me who is the common denominator (it is), and they must label me Borderline traits... which I accept it could be and that I am the problem, if that is true...but if i give examples of the behaviors of those I have interpersonal issues with—-they did act in an unloving to hateful way toward me, which means they don’t much care for me, which makes my emotions tank low and I get very sad and cry because these are the few people who are closest to me and it really hurts.

So far, none of the meds helped with my issue, except to help me recover a little more quickly from the depths of the sadness and the duration of the bad emotions (anger, sadness). I am more able to distract myself and do something else, which eventually brings my emotions back to normal. It’s not that I feel any better, I am just able to act normal once again vs having a meltdown anxiety, crying fit.

My husband’s response to how the meds don’t stop the issue of how he doesn’t connect with me is to tell me to increase the meds. I’m scared to do that to my body and doubt they will cause me to not care anymore about the triggers, not react negatively, go along like a zombie, change my entire personality, succumb to the callous treatment of those few people and have calmly not reacted and then no friction would ever have happened.

I wish I could have gone along and never adversely reacted, but I couldn’t. Can any amount of meds have helped with that? Because that’s the issue here.

My husband is still the major trigger and the person I deal with on a daily basis.
My mother is handled well now, being kept at just the right distance.
My son was a falling out that he perpetrated totally unprompted by anything I did, and I handled it as gently as I could, including being the one to reach out and try to draw him back. He totally turned abruptly 180 to me. I did not see it coming.
My sister was another falling out that turned abruptly on a dime as well, and over virtually nothing. Her callousness was shocking. I just reread the texts and am just stunned.

There was also a lifelong on/off bff who HAD to go. The way the 40 year friendship ended was she tried to crash through my boundaries. I wasn’t allowed to have boundaries. What’s a boundary? When I said “I do not want to have this conversation with you. I’m driving. Stop calling me.” She blew up in a text fit. I didn’t respond. She continued the harassment. I didn’t even read anything she wrote. When she’ blow up like that, she’d be really vicious, so why read that venom? Anyway, she never called again, never apologized, we haven’t spoken in two years.

So...mother is all my life some strain, emotional, verbal, son and sister were ‘ideal’ relationships until fallings out, both at the same time, over the past two years.

Two years has some meaning then, or it’s just random. I thought a lot about that and think one did have something to do with the other, though logically it seems they are unrelated. I’ve searched my mind for what i could have possibly done to have warranted that from them.

Anyway— when you tell a therapist you have issues with close interpersonal relationships, they think personality disorder traits.

I am attracted and/or surrounded by a certain cast of characters. I am drawn to them because I am used to them. I take responsibility from whatever dysfunctional way I contribute to the problem.

Now I just walk away. I don’t want to argue. I think this path is best. I want to find peace.

I have always found you to be a good listener who gives good but gentle feedback (based on how you respond to posts). Difficult people have more trouble finding people who listen to them. Perhaps in the past, you didn't walk away soon enough (when overwhelmed) but now you are. I think you would agree that this doesn't mean we aren't responsive to difficult people in our lives. In my case, I have learned (most of the time, some family members still can draw me in because I love them) not to take it so personally which enables me to walk away rather than be guilt tripped into feeling responsible for their outbursts. I still end up listening to it sometimes because I want to be a good person and everyone needs love and attention but I don't get as emotionally upset just because they are. I have gotten better at distinguishing which emotional problems are mine and which are theirs.

I think we have both made a lot of progress!!!!

I agree, we both improved in those ways. IMHO, it wasn’t the meds that made us do it, it was simply living and learning, then changing those behaviors.

I am now prescribed Lamictal combined with some other emotion meds. I read the side effects and it scares me. I was started on a low dose and immediately it caused me itching. IDK what results, if any, it is giving me. It is intended for seizures or bipolar treatment. I have neither of those conditions! So, I’ll continue the low dose until I speak to my Dr. Again and he’ll drop me as a patient and then I’m back on my own without a psychiatrist and no more meds approach to solving my interpersonal relationship problems where I am the common denominator, the one reacting with anxiety, depression, and emotional ‘dysregulation’ from the treatment by these few A hole people (and their behavior is undeniable A hole).

Sorry I had to revisit this.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Prycejosh1987 I think medication can dim the lights on emotion but it generally doesnt do much. If someone has anxiety or depression it can level the playing field emotionally. At the end of the day its up to us to control our emotions, i have dealt with mental health myself. When i stop taking the tablets i am actually more upbeat.

I completely disagree and I wonder if you understand brain chemistry. If you have something like bipolar is is a brain disorder or dysfunction. It is not a personality issue or willpower issue or being too emotional. Emotions are symptoms. They can be situational due to something traumatic or stressful or it can be because the brain chemistry doesnt work right. Most often with depression, bipolar, ptsd etc. the chemicals in the brain (serotonin, dopamine and norepinephrine) are out of balance and different than someone who is just having a bad day. Yes in a reactive sense we control out emotions and as a whole we are responsible for what we do or say when our emotions are out of control. But the cause isnt the fault of the person with a mental illness. Even the term mental illness-

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Definition of mental illness : any of a broad range of medical conditions (such as major depression, schizophrenia, obsessive compulsive disorder, or panic disorder) that are marked primarily by sufficient disorganization of personality, mind, or emotions to impair normal psychological functioning and cause marked distress or disability and that are typically associated with a disruption in normal thinking, feeling, mood, behavior, interpersonal interactions, or daily functioning

means its an illness. If someone has cancer no one blames them. If someone needs glasses to see no one tells them they should just hold the book closer and deal with it. Treating mental illness is 100% important. I dont doubt you when you say stopping meds for you means you feel better. But that is not the norm with people diagnosed with a mental illness.

Quote:

Originally Posted by TunedOut My therapist was also a psychologist (a doctoral degree rather than a master's degree where she did supervised internships and research) so I had the impression she could diagnose but could not prescribe. All my meds were prescribed by a psychiatrist due to a diagnosis of anxiety, panic disorder and depression. I was very naive until my attempt and just took what they prescribed without questioning it (I have never asked for a particular medication--only to have dosages lowered) or understanding that any of it was habit forming or would be dangerous to stop. I now look at the warning lablels and side effects more closely whenever I am prescribed anything. I also have a diagnosis of bipolar 2 currently in full remission--I have never seen where a psychiatrist said in my records that I have active bipolar 2 , which seems a little weird. Can't say that I fully understand what has gone on with me even though I have seen 4 psychiatrists who have all given me an anxiety and depression diagnosis. My fourth psychiatrist who I trust the most because she actually takes the time to talk to me (all the previous psychiatrists had 10 minute appointments where they just prescibed based on what they decided during my very first appointment with them where I answered a set of standard questions about my history). She added to the diagnoses panic disorder and bipolar 2 in remission. She adjusted some of the medications I was given and added one so that they seem to be helping more. The Bupropion dose I had been put on by all my previous psychiatrists was doing more harm than good. Perhaps it caused me to have a temporary case of Bipolar 2 then when I had to stop it cold turkey--it once again caused more harm than good? Based on my experiences with psychiatrists, I have trouble feeling like diagnoses are always accurate. How can they know if they never spend any time talking to you? I guess we just feel differently about some of this yet agree on other things. I do think that psych meds are helpful but also sometimes cause harm because it is harder to know what is going on in our brains than with some of the physical conditions where there are definitive tests.

What made you stop the wellbutrin cold turkey?

Hey @TunedOut

Quote:

Originally Posted by TunedOut Even if the disorder is from the environment, if a person waits too long to get help, they can end up needing medication due to complex PTSD. When I first went to a psychologist (about 8 years ago), I was extremely suicidal. I was prescribed Bupropion and Xanax (much more than I take now--he said I could take it every 4 hours if necessary and I was given four doses a day! Plus, I had no idea how addictive it was) and my suicidal thoughts stopped.

How long ago did this occur, like when were you first prescribed them?

Quote:

I do wish I hadn't been prescribed the Xanax and another antidepressant might have worked better (the Bupropion made me more hyper and I was able to sleep much less on it--I needed the Xanax to come down from the Bupropion!). Also, I sometimes wonder if the meds change our brain chemistry to the point that we now need them permanently. When I stopped the Bupropion (I had lost my medical insurance) in 2015, it was one of many things that led to my attempt that put me in the hospital that year.

I due believe in somewhat due diligence when it comes to looking up info about meds. Like reading the print out from the pharmacy and some googling on rx list. I also think its a prescribing doctors due diligence to have a convo about the meds with the patient.

Wellbutrin is very activating. It is used off label for adhd and it used to be called zyban and used for quitting smoking. It should only be taken in the morning because it will cause sleep issues. I do not know if meds can change your brain permanently but because they target the receptors in the brain I believe it changes something.

I say I am not bipolar but do think I may have been slightly bipolar (I think we are all on a spectrum when it comes to mental health issues) and the Wellbutrin turned me from depression (or perhaps gave me an aggravated kind of depression rather than a black, bottomless pit kind) but activated my anxiety so it became even worse and made me unable to sleep. When the doctor asked if I felt better, I said, "Yes" because depression is much, much worse than anxiety but I when I was first prescribed I was working in a very stressful job then would come home all wound up, cook dinner (while drinking wine to try to calm down/feel better from work) then be too wound up to go to sleep and end up sometimes finishing the bottle while everyone else was asleep then get up before everyone else to cook breakfast for my family before I went to work. The Wellbutrin (bupropion) certainly gave me the energy to keep this schedule up without rest. I was NOT drinking this much before the Bupropion because I would fall asleep much earlier--usually before everyone else in my family! I did take the bupropion in the morning. I now take 100 mg instead of 300 mg and have asked my psychiatrist if I can go down to 75 mg (the lowest dose)--she wants me to wait (because she has been adjusting my other meds and because of the issues going on in my life/cancer and family issues). Reducing the dose helped me a lot.

I went off the bupropion because my husband and I both became unemployed and I decided that I would save money by not going to the doctor (we had no insurance). By the time I realized I was in trouble--I could not get into the doctor--you had to make appointments 30 days in advance...

The low doses of the meds may be working. My coping style has changed a bit for the better. The root of the issue causing the anxiety hasn’t been fixed, but my reaction has been less intense, which was most harmful to myself. So yay for me!

My reactions to these meds, though, are not exactly what they are supposed to be doing. I am feeling much more generalized anxiety while on anti anxiety meds. But, I’ll settle for the improvement in my response to the trigger.

The B med stopped the profuse tears, couldn’t make them but still a dry cry.
The L med added, canceled the miracle working of the B med.
I got to dislike the feeling of the dry cry anyway.
The two meds together at least let me bounce back faster.
I originally came on here with ‘having crying fits’ issue from close relationship. Nothing’s improved though we try. Then the last two years, the relationship issues extended to some other family members due to THEIR heartless treatment of me. I now think I caused the chain reaction with my unhappiness about the original issue. My emotions caused me more emotional pain with or without meds.

I sometimes worry that my untreated/ineffectively treated anxiety and my attempt caused terrible problems in my family. It certainly contributed to the terrible mix but guilt tripping myself instead of forgiving myself just kept that train rolling. IMO the issues still ongoing in my family are more complicated than that and their are things I can do to help others heal but most of the healing can only be done by them. Yes, I agree we have to stop ourselves when we find our emotions are running away because emotions that come from fear and rejection rarely help the situation...

It has taken me a lot of time and reflection to figure out what my meds do for me. I haven't taken my xanax for days and days and have been sleeping better than I ever have before. I credit most of the improvement in trusting in God and forgiving myself. I try to be careful to act in the best way possible (with love and charity) on a daily basis. When I make more good decisions now, the good feelings build.

“When I make more good decisions now, the good feelings build.”

^I am glad when I do too and it feels good.

I didn’t suffer in silence. By confiding in a few family members, I lessened myself in their eyes. Plus, they did not help me get out or get well. By speaking to or within earshot of my kids, I lessened myself to them as well.

If I had MI, I didn’t HAVE to speak about it to anyone except a doctor. By my doing so, I now think that’s why my sister and partly why my son turned 180º.

IMO, they did this because they have problems of their own (bias/ignorance about mental illness, projection, there own selfishness, not sure what because I do not know their hearts). It WAS probably hard on your son since he was your child and your Hs (who also probably wasn't perfect). It seems like you weren't the only one who was involved in the drama. It was so MUCH more than spilled milk but life isn't a bed of roses, is it?

IMO, the person that admits they have a problem deserves a lot of credit. Though one of my diagnosis is bipolar 2 in remission (a diagnosis I am unsure of but one that is totally possible), whenever I go the doctor lately, my H pipes up at the very beginning of all my doctor appointments that I am bipolar and in other places he mentions that I have cancer. It is like he uses my conditions to explain why family issues have gone so badly. He also always constantly asks if I am taking my meds. Sometimes I think that others find themselves focusing on another's MI diagnosis as the reason for problems instead of facing all the factors that led to the problems. Perhaps they just are not at the same place we are in their internal journeys--they haven't faced all their demons. Facing demons is not easy--it can make you go mad.

Sure, blame it on the dog. He’s deflecting any role he plays in it and he knows what he says isn’t true. I hate when people know you take meds and are being condescending when they ask if you took them. You can think of a witty comeback and laugh it off. “Don’t concern yourself with me, dear. Did you remember to wipe?”

Did you remember to wipe? Lol it’s too funny. Next time I ask my husband if he took his meds, I’ll tell him he should ask me if I wiped lol lol

My husband actually likes if I remind him. He normally don’t forget but there’ve been few times he texted from work “ugh I forgot my pill and feel nauseous”. So he isn’t offended but I don’t normally remind him to be nasty. He reminds me to take meds even it’s not mental health related.

But I see what you are saying. That’s a ploy. To make person look like they are crazy ones.

I did it few times though not out of noble intentions, one time when my husband couldn’t settle in a restaurant, kept turning and tossing and fussing with his routine and looking at the door and making noises (he has severe OCD-safety related-and when it is triggered his Tourette’s kicks in), I asked him if he took his meds. Not nice of me. He said “sigh... for the 100th time when I forget meds ONE day I might feel nauseated but my symptoms not flaring up because of not taking meds one day, for the 100th time there is no rhyme or reason for it flaring up”. I could be a pain ugh. Not always having patience.

I can ensure you if I had to take mental health meds and my spouse asked me if I took it, I’d bite their head off. I imagine it’s infuriating