[Fuzzybear]

Can you tell me what helps you with anger?

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

Can you tell me what helps you with anger?

I visit thrift stores and purchase dishes, mugs and so on, anything breakable, take it home to my back yard where I have a container. then I sit there throwing the items in breaking them to bits lol the sound is satisfying, at the same time Im using up energy and defusing my anger and when I am done I have quite the collection of glass bits for turning into various art projects. for example, my sidewalk is a mosaic using glass laid out in the cement. my patio has mosaic decor also. all because I felt angry and needed to break some glass and ceramic dishes, mugs and so on.

[Revenge Tour]

It depends on the severity I suppose but my general sequence is running, talking, time.

[OafFish]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

Can you tell me what helps you with anger?

Remembering that anger comes when you think a thing is unfair.

Loss that’s unfair becomes anger
Loss that’s reasonable becomes sorrow

For myself I figure I probably deserve it.

It’s not a coping mechanism I’d recommend

[SpaghettiLegs]

I struggle with anger because I feel guilty about it. I used to shout and scream, break things, storm off, throw stuff away (everything my mother did ). I still struggle with it, like splitting black and white: I hate you, I want to die etc etc. I try to be still now and wait for the storm to pass but it can take a few days. I feel really insane when I'm in an angry phase but it almost always comes from hurt so self-compassion helps.

DBT has helped (reading about it etc), Internal Family Systems (just yt videos), Tara Brach, Eckhart Tolle, Pema Chodron, praying, meditating, radical acceptance.

Spiritual life may be just magical thinking but it keeps me sober and not in prison, I just try to survive each day and sometimes it's easy, sometimes it's intense suffering.

[Discombobulated]

I used to vent a lot around my h but I didn’t realise it was upsetting him - I’m trying not to do that now. I actually think I’m my case venting had become a way of feeding my anger and it wasn’t solving it.

For me the anger is usually a surface emotion and there’s normally something underlying it - I try to acknowledge and address these other emotions at their core. I also notice I’m calmer when I work on keeping myself grounded, exercise, eating properly, reading, that sort of thing.