How to cope or work on this ?

I am chronically dependant on others. I can't even identify what to consistently work on because it's just that bad. I was wondering if maybe there's a step program or something to help with this or what's worked for you in the past.
I have to ask for help literally on an almost daily basis. As an adult I can't even meet my own basic human needs to begin a routine.
My life generally seems to fall apart when I feel like I'm making the first step to where I'd be stable enough to start independance but I'm flimsy.
I don't even have a starting point here.

Welcome to the forums @Individualperson.
The first thing I would suggest is to look into options for a therapist. They can help you talk through your experience and start to see how to take the next important steps. You could also try looking for a DBT workbook online.
You should also take a moment to acknowledge that you've already taken the first step to recovering, by reaching out for help online. That can be a big step, but you made it.