[Cbminor]

Life stinks. Even if i am happy, no extra sress, good friends. heck, even if i were a billioneer and had a big loving family, life would suck. I can never get what i truly want. And that is the truth and more knowledge, i feel to be an idiot, and everyone around me to be even dumber so that i have to educate them. life blows. there is no reason why we are here. we are simple yet psychologicly complicated biological creations, which somehow created and evolved on the little planet. and our mind is set the way it is due to the long evolution that our species has went through, and i am sick of fighting the mind, it overpowers me. I have to do as it desires or else i am depressed, and i can't do what it desires, because nobody has the wisdom i desire. oh and by the way, i am new here. so hello.

[amdx64]

Well Alex welcome to the forum and life. However let me give you some ideas ... everything has different view points, besides the glass half full and half empty theroy.

You seem to look at things from a deep and ideal mind. Now imagine if you could tap into that and use it to lets say find someone else whos less abled to understand .. you then would change things.

See you have this gift to see and think and be able to talk about what you see. While yours right now is in negative flavor .. use that power to help others and you know what .. this dark sucking will change .. i have found personally helping others give me a new view and feeling. If you dislike the way the mind is set use that information you see and show others and help them as they help you and you can find that gapping hole filled to where sucking just might be a thought rather then a reality

[Hope4me2]

TO PC



so sorry you so down right now.........hang in there..........there is lots of help and support here.....

[Cbminor]

i can see exactly what you mean, and i do help others, i go to philosopher's cafe (it is a little local group where people who are somewhat like me come and discuss subjects). Unfortunatly, i do not recieve the joy of helping people as much as i would to learn the answers to all my questions. I know that everybody wandered some of these questions, but simply can not stop, sometimes i feel as i am going crazy. I have read some psychology and philosophy, and a lot of the times i find the solution to my problem all by myself. An example of that would like if i am angry and am losing control, physical stress, like running or working out relieives the violent side of anger. I still am somewhat depressed, but not violent or mean. and i found ways to treat depression without pills or theropies. But i must admit, this is something i have no clue how to whether walk around it or satisfy it. All my life i have been forming theories and wandering about many things. I use practicly all my knowledge, cause my philosophy goes like this - "if do not use the knowledge you have, there is not a big point in knowing than." I could easily consider myslef an unofficial psychologist, because i have helped people a lot and it worked, and i helped myself. But there is this one thing left that i simply can not satisfy. And the way my mind is built, i should be able to satisfy it in order ro be happy, that's why i posted this on the depression page. i am sick of teaching people, i want to learn myself, but who has that knowledge.

[cat_eye]

hi alex! I also know an Alex D. haha. Welcome to the forums! We're here for ya.

-Carolyn.

[MacD]

uh...welcome Alex....I don't believe I've given anyone a virtual hug this soon in the acquaintanceship...but here goes....((((((Alex))))))
grace

[yellowrose]

Hi Alex,
You wrote, " am sick of teaching people, i want to learn myself, but who has that knowledge." I find this to be your biggest obstacle. What happens to many of us is we have so much knowledge in our brain and can figure things out logically. However, when it comes to emotions and sense of self/being----we have a hard time sticking it out because it is something that is "FELT" and it represents our "core self"-----the self that is buried underneath the knowledge---the knowledge we hide behind to avoid getting closer to the self.
I wonder if you would just take a risk to "look" into yourself rather than look outward to books, etc....might you find some relief?
You definitely are the only one who has the knowledge to help yourself...give it a try! HUGS!!
Yellowrose