New and lots to ask

Hi everyone. So I'm new here and I honestly don't know what I suffer from. I just know I don't like it. I'm depressed and refuse to get help (much to the annoyance of some friends). It has gotten to the point where even going to my music doesn't help me which is kind of weird for me. But anyways, I don't get help because I don't have a job and thus have to live with my parents still. I'm 19 and hopefully will be gone from this house soon. I basically just feel like everyone is out to get me sometimes but a lot of the time, I'm just sad. It's been like that for years now but I figure as long as I'm functioning and stuff, I don't need to be in a hurry to get help. Is that wrong? Is there a way for it to just build up and get so bad that when I do get help, there won't be much it can do?
Anyways, I really don't know what to say because I feel like I don't even know what I'm thinking. But I knew I needed to get myself out there, just to try to ask for advice.

Well, I have bipolar disorder, so I know what it's like to be depressed sometimes. The main reaction I have to your post is, "Why be depressed and miserable when you can get help and enjoy life?"

Feel free to read and post in this forum, but also to read and post in other places. Almost everyone of us here is getting help for our depression. It's amazing when we can get through it and see life in a whole better way. At 19 you have your whole life ahead of you. Do you think your parents would be opposed to your getting help?

Of course, it's your choice.

Ask as many questions as you'd like. That's a lot of what Psych Central is about!

Hi Yoslos ~ I'm so sorry you're suffering so. I too have depression, and it's severe. I've suffered from depression since I was a small child and it's been difficult. I wasn't able to get any help for it until I was in my 20's because my parents were too busy getting drunk.

Yoslos, I know you said you refuse to get help, but I don't understand why. If it was available to you, would you go? Why not check with your local Dept. of Social Services and see if any mental health services are available to you? You might be surprised and find that you CAN get some counseling, either for free or on a sliding scale. It's worth looking into. Depression isn't something to be taken lightly. Sometimes people go into "remission" where it seems to go away, but most of the time it comes back and very often with a vengeance! So look into it.

If help isn't available thru Social services, then talk with your doctor --- he can put you on an antidepressant temporarily until you CAN go into therapy. These medications are great for easing the depression -- In fact since I have clinical depression I'll have to be on these for the rest of my life. I've already been on them for about 40 years!! I've tried going off, but each time I fall into the worst case of depression you can imagine. I can't live like that. So talk with your doctor -- he can help you.

Best of luck and God bless. Keep us posted, ok? Hugs, Lee

Thank you for the responses. The issue with my parents is kinda complex. I don't see my dad much because of work, but he and I never got along and over 50% of the time we see each other is fighting or me taking his insults. My mom likes to get drunk. I may try the antidepressant thing until I get enough money and a stable enough job to move out and get real help.
I know I NEED help, I'm just way too closed off to ask for it. I've driven to various places where I could get help but I've only voluntarily seen a counselor once. And even then, I just couldn't bring myself to talk about too much important stuff that was bothering me. Maybe I'll try again tomorrow though.

Thanks for the support!