Brick wall

I have no idea how to cope with this intense loneliness, fear and worthlessness. I feel like I have absolutely no sense of purpose. How did it get to this point? Where from here?

Well, I'd say you're off to a positive start; you're HERE! For myself, when I found myself in your shoes, I did seek professional help and come to this site often to feel a part of something and hopefully help someone similiar. ((((Hugs to you)))))

Thanks, this site has been great. It is the first time I've ever felt like less freak and more normal because depressed because it isn't just me. My life has been spiraling out of control since my youngest left for colleg a couple of weeks ago and she is <font color="red"> </font> doing great.....never calls. Ver independent which is good. I want her so much to be better than me.
Thank you for the hugs tonight.....i miss hugs both from my kids and friends and guy friends. I'm 41yrs old and have sworn off of men completely.

Well, I'm the last person to talk with about relationships (I don't have a good track record)! I should swear off men also!!! Do you have any hobbies to take your mind off your oldest leaving? Just a thought. I know when my ex has my children, I can't be in the house alone and will normally try to stay at my mother's house or a nearby friend.

My oldest which is my son is 21yrs and he lives 2 hrs northwest of me and my youngest is my daughter that just left for college 2 hrs southeast of me. They went in total opposite directions. My parents and I only live 13 miles from me but it may as well be 1300. They distanced themselves after I disgraced the family by being the only to ever get a divorce. (wasn't the whole reason i found out a few years after my divorce but made sense why my mom was never there for me during or after my marriage) Friends for me isn't really an option. I have 2 good ones and thankfully one of those lives in the city where I have to see my Doctors for cancer treatments and am able to stay with her it just isn't the funniest times because I don't feel good. And she still has small kids at home. My friend that lives her well....I love her and would and have done anything for her between every breakup she goes through but as soon as the next guy comes along and moves in I just feel like a third wheel even though she likes having me around, he doesn't and I don't blame him. I know that must have been a long boring explanation but.......it actually is how I found this site and by reading others and chating a little bit....I'm still alive and I guess that means something.
so thank you soooooo much for taking time to talk to me. Oh, yeah speaking of exhusbands there the phone is ringing now.....he is the reason I won't ever trust my judgement when it comes to men again. Don't think I will answer it....I'm sure he will make me sorry at some point before the day is over....yuck!
I don't have any real hobbies but I think maybe I would like to take a class out at our community college in the evenings. Maybe just one....I'm sure that is as much as I could handle. I don't know what do you think? I fear failing.

Hello mssumom. I used to think that it was normal to feel out of place, unwanted and sad. (I also know what it feels like to not trust my judgement in men (my ex still calls constantly)). All you need is a little help in the right direction because from you own words, you hit a 'brick wall'. We all do from time to time. Go see a counsellor or theapist and get tested for depression. If your seritonin is low (could be hereditary or from being depressed for more years that you realize), then get some medical help and see if that clears things up inside of you. It wouldn't hurt to continue to see a therapist for atleast a few sessions to talk things out in a safe environment. If you have never been, it is you that is doing the talking and discovering, and not the therapist who is telling you what to do. It is very self empowering. Your life is changing and you just need some TLC, good friends and a little help.

Mrs. Mom you are suffering from empty nest syndrom...along with whatever else...maybe you should see someone professional to talk to because the sooner you get help the sooner it will go away...if you let it linger...it eats you up and can take a long long time to go away...if ever...Please try it! And before you know it...daughter will be home for a visit...and for you to do laundry...lol

((((((( mssumom )))))))))

It is a very empty nest!! Intense showdown with my exhusband last night left wondering at any sanity I might have had left.....the man is a nut. He came by get this....to just tell me he was thinking about me on the 5th anniversary of our divorce and to let me know that he still loves me (he divorced me, fathered a child before the divorce and lives with a different girl all the time) and when I asked him to leave (i didn't let him in, only on the porch) he got angry as usual and hit me. You would think at some point I would learn to anticipate that but we have been divorced 5 years I want him to just go away. I thought it would get better when our daughter left for college, he would have no excuses to "drop by" the house but he still thinks he owns it. Thanks to everybody who is writing to me....I will say again that this site has saved me. I'm must head out to the hospital for my next to last radiation treatment....YEAH!!!

I am praying for you mssumom...that your last treatment does the trick!!! and that man...grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...anyhow (((hugs to you)))

Beth......thank you for the prayers. I know that there have been many lifted for me and is why I'm closer to beating a cancer that only occurs in 3% of all cancers. I shouldn't struggle so much with my faith but it seems lately with setbacks and my daughter(her name is Beth!) leaving home, my exhusband, etc....I'm struggling bad. I think the best part of every day right now is being on here and feeling like I kind of belong somewhere and I might make some new friends.

mssumom...I feel the same way...I don't have the same kind of troubles you have...but I feel like this PC site has helped me...It is my haven in this cruel world...I hope things get better for you everyday...!! PM me anytime!!!