We hope everyone will read this. (Possible trigger: mentions of SU)

And congratulations!

Rainbowfairy, Possom and fuzzybear! You made it through. Great job!

And if you made the pledge with us yesterday and don't feel as if you were as 'perfect' as you wanted to be-Please come back and make the pledge with us again. We are not aiming for perfect. We are just trying to keep our light alive for just one more day!

Here I be. Another day. A good day.

High Five T & S and for all who are participating in this thread.

Hey Possum!

I was feeling a little down because some of our people had not returned. Perhaps later on today.

But your message just cheered me right up! Thanks! Tea

I am still here Tea. Not focusing well this morning. Still keeping my committment to safety and well being. Yeah for us!!!

I'm here And I'm making the pledge for another day!

Thank you seeker and fuzzy. And dam right, yeah! Frickin A-Yeah!

I think we are super hero's. (Now about those costumes...)

This. I'm all for ideas like this but there has to be a sort of back up plan, a list of safe coping mechanisms for sufferers to fall back on. As a lot of us here don't have that i hope careful thought is given to trying such exercises. For those who can do it, congrats so far

Good morning!

At 11:27 p.m. here in Riverworld, somewhere high in the Rockies. After four days of almost total sleep deprevation, finally. Eleven hours. I feel so chipper I will have to keep an eye on mania and make sure it doesn't try to join the parade today. Tonight. Well, today for me, so who cares.

I am here to make my pledge. I pledge that for the next 24 hours I will keep suicide from trying to crawl back into my back pocket. I will not be seduced by old patterns, nor promises and images that it will ease the pain. I embrace the pain! It means I am still alive. And even in writing these words I feel the weight slipping from my shoulders and it feels GOOD!

As of now, I relinquish my job as resident cheerleadeer. You are adults. You must make up your own mind. I only wish this could be as awesome for you as it is for me. I will continue to make my pledge, everyday, and if anyone choses to join me-that would be great. And if I am alone on this journey-it is what it is.

Going without sleep has left me with chores piled up, but I'm okay with that. My room looks as if a tribe of Bedoins have camped here for a month and my kitchen looks a pack of wild dogs had a party in it. But Arc Wings is calling me and they need their queen. So word count comes first and the rest will get done when it get's done.

BTW-it seems as if someone mistook me for the cruise director or the party planner. 'Aint gonna happen. I've got my own party to plan.

"You must make up your own mind" you said. How true. Whatever the motivation...well, mine was experience. As some would say, been there/done that. Its an experience I wish I never had. One I am ashamed of. Bad as it was, I never want to go through it again.
Well, its 5:33 am. Im still a bit foggy.

I'm still in this fight against the forces of darkness..... They will lose, always!

Thank you babygirl.

There is a tremor in the force!

I know that I used to feel that way a lot and sometimes think about suicide or stop taking my meds and go back into psychosis where at least I had created a spiritual world that made sense. Though I have been better for four years now since diagnosed and hospitalized the thoughts still persisted when stress levels got to high or I felt like I had no purpose.
I am now a certified peer specialist. It's a new thing that's only been around for ten years. The purpose is that those of us that have recovered can help others recover because we have been there. I know that people I work with sometimes stay on meds because I tell them to stick it out it gets better.
I am very happy now because I work full-time helping others recover. If you can't do that find something to volunteer at. I think we need to feel as though we are doing something positive and helping others. It has given me purpose and completely changed my life.
That might be away of keeping it out of your pocket more than not. Well that's my story and I'm sticking to it. LOL!

Hello dear Tea&Sympthy. I'm so so very pleased to see that this thread is still going. I'm really gonna have to stay true to the pledge as I'm feeling a little down. All the more to stay true and reinstate for another 24hrs I guess. Thankyou for providing this special place. HUGS. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Hey waggiedog!

Nice to see you! Glad you made it back from the dark side. Yeah, I'm gonna keep on truckin as long as I've got tires to truck with.

I pledge that for the next twentyfour hours, I will not allow suicide to fill my mind or corrupt my heart or try to steal my soul. I will remember that I have a purpose, that my life makes a difference to other's and that I will spin around on this globe as long as God deems me worthy.

As I write these words I feel a wave of relief wash over me. I feel safe, protected. I was a prisoner of my own mind for so many years. Take that, dark side! And that! Did I mention that me and fuzzy have been taking fencing lessons? We will make a reservation for you tomorrow night, waggiedog! We will fight the dark force as long as we have breath in our body-and suicide will never win!

I have found a sense of purpose and meaning in life to also be invaluable.

I'm making the pledge again today!

I, also, make the pledge for another day. Without carrying that around I will have energy for important things.

I honestly think this is a great idea. I am taking the pledge for today. I needed to see this today, too.

You guys totally rock-welcome grey matter!

It's 10:12 p.m in Riverworld. I am beat up all to hell because it was that 1st of the month, run around and give people money for the things that should be free-like power and water and rent, day.

I haven't been keeping track of how long we have been doing this-maybe a week? But I know how well it's working because last night I was sitting in my chair (before posting) and I was getting worried about things, you know, and the trickster had the nerve to fly over and sit on my shoulder and started whispering his evil crap in my ear...why don't you just give up, no one will ever read your work, might as well quit trying...and I swatted him off my should so hard and so fast the chair spun around a couple of times.

And I felt strong and powerful and victorious! It was the first time I had done it or even thought about doing it-but it worked! I was protected by
a promise I take most seriously. So I pledge, for the next twenty four hours not to actively think about suicide-I have the courage to live my life in many years, and I want to be around to enjoy it. So I'm taking this weight and giving it to God because I know he can carry it.

A very dear friend of mine who also hangs out here, suggested we have each other's back and if we see that trickster, we are proactive with own care and remind each other to take the pledge every day. Maybe more people should have a pledge buddy.

Later, Tea















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I'm making the pledge again today, hopefully it will free up some space in my fuzzy head to focus on something more interesting and productive . (get lost you little horned piece of shyt )

Love,
Fuzzy

OMG-Fuzzy, I love that!

So sorry about that last post-that was me falling asleep with my fingers still on the keyboard. Does anyone else fall asleep in front of their computer?

Yes, this is sort of like a battle between good and evil. Not that mental illness is evil, anymore than cancer or diabetes is evil. That's all about genetic wiring. But I believe that in the ultimate battle between good and evil, part of evil's weaponry will be trying to steal lives when we are at our most vurnerable.

I fail to understand, though, why the concept of fighting for our survival, of banding together to find victory over suicide and suicidal thoughts, could be upsetting to anyone. But I refuse to be controlled by that kind of twisted logic. I suppose this would be more interesting if I said I was going to go looking for a clothesline and a high beam, or that I have enough klonipin stashed to off an elephant. But I've yet to make a post that ends in the words...and I just want to die. But I've read plenty of them.

I honestly do not comprehend that in all of the thousands of members here, why more people don't want to push suicide away-to find a way to live a life where you really feel alive and you don't begin or end each day with those words in your mind? I used to go to sleep, hoping I would never wake up again-praying for that heart attack or that next stroke that would bring me down. It's an easy place to live-comfortable and familiar despite the constant terror.

But I want to live! I want to fight! I want to triumph over depression and have a decent life where I am at least functional. And that is what I have. Because every twenty four hours I ask God for the strength to make it through another day. I'm even learning how to smile and laugh again, and I spend more hours happy than I do sad. And that seems like a wonderful victory to me.

This is what I wish for every person here. To find the courage within yourself to make it just one more day.

I read this every day, and think about making the pledge. But I just can't. I know that if the thoughts come creeping in, which is most days, I can't just swat them away. Sometimes I can distract myself a bit, sometimes I can delay but I can't get rid of them. I don't want to live until I'm 70/80 if I still feel like this. I just haven't got to a place where I can do this so to try and pledge for it would just be a lie.

Hi Tea. I was wondering what all the O's and W's were for.
I have been exceedingly tired due to insomnia. I hope I can stay awake til I get home.

I pledge my committment to safety.......

Oh, no sweetie-

You don't have to be perfect. If the darkness creeps in for awhile, you will still come out on the other side. And when you reach the light, jusr try again. I never meant for anyone to think they had to be perfect and I'm so sorry if anyone has taken it that way.

It's just about trying. And trying again and trying again. And then that day will come when the trickster won't even bother you. None of us is perfect, especially me! Did everyone hear that? I have so many goals and dreams and this is just part of it. But getting this part of it frees you up for so many other good things.

Look for a pm from me very soon-like in the next half hour.

Love and Tea

This thread will probably be taken down because someone complained they were triggered by it.

I personally feel there should be an entire section on suicide. Talking about suicide does not cause someone to do it. A suicide section might actually save someone.

http://forums.psychcentral.com/commu...t-suicide.html