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#1
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Pretty much.
![]() Of course you can see it differently! That's just my perspective. Hugs to anyone that wants them! Hope that the tide starts to turn for you guys in rough spots. ![]() |
![]() Bumblebuzz12, Clara22, mulan, Pikku Myy, tigerlily84
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![]() Bumblebuzz12, tigerlily84
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#2
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Lots of worries and stresses, but the depression's at bay. Feeling pretty good. Saw my therapist today; it feels so great to be validated.
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![]() Clara22
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![]() Clara22, mulan, Pikku Myy, TheOriginalMe, tigerlily84
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#3
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I went for a long walk, didn't overeat and started the long process of clearing out all the junk I hang on to because I am afraid of who knows what. So I did three positive things. My mood has been OK but a little flat. I'm coping.
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![]() Clara22, hope2010
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![]() Bark, Pikku Myy
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#4
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not a great day...overwhelmed
__________________
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell |
![]() Bark, Clara22, Pikku Myy
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#5
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Depression is not affecting me. I'm possibly hypo. Anger is flaring. Sleep soon hopefully.
__________________
PTSD possible bipolar Meds: propranalol 20mg 2x's(blood pressure), lamictal 300mg, seroquel 100mg, effexor 75mg, sprycel 100mg (CML, chronic myeloid leukemia), iron supplement, multivitamin ![]() |
![]() Bark, Clara22
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![]() Pikku Myy
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#6
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I'm afraid of start quitting on my mental health care. It's hard.
It's not that I don't know I should get help or that I don't want to have it. I have some avoidant personality traits (I'm good at self-diagnosis... ![]() Is the same things in the litle shops near by. I go there once, twice, I'm a stranger so there is no big deal. But it comes to a point when the people who work there start to recognize your face and then just the idea of me going there to buy something makes me feel anxyous imagining what they might think of my shopping and my choices, and sometimes I just don't go there because I feel stupid of just buying this or that. It's stupid but I can't avoid it. Any way I'm trying to avoid meeting with my doctor. I don't feel ready to come back. Some weeks ago I met her on faculty. It was so akward, I'm pretty sure my "hi" smille looked pretty fake. I still have to schedulle a new appointment since I miss the last one (kinda on porpuse), and I don't feel like doing it. My decision is no, not now, but one part of me knows it won't lead me anywhere, so if I say no to her proposition is like start ending the journey and I will have to explain her why I don't want to do that, but I also don't want to tell her my reasons. |
![]() Bark, Clara22, Pikku Myy, tigerlily84
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#7
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I just feel stuck and frankly tired of reading about everyone's successes and happy vacations. I just want one positive thing to justify waking up. idk.
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![]() Anonymous37855, Bark, birdpumpkin, Clara22, flours, MotherMarcus, Pikku Myy
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#8
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Went to work today feeling very down and depressed. It was not because of being at work. I very much enjoy my job. It was because of the news of my brother being diagnosed with lung problems and it's serious. I feel really bad for him, even though he and I didn't get along all of our lives.
I decided to call him today after work before working out for myself. When I got him on the phone, he sounded very groggy and moody. But I accepted it because of his condition. Much to my surprise, he called me two hours later. He apologized for not sounding good. I told him that I completely understood. We had a nice talk. He was in a hospital. It seemed like a miracle because he sounded great and didn't cough once. I guess in terminal illness, there are good moments, so I've heard. |
![]() Bark, Clara22, DogTired, hope2010, Pikku Myy, SadPam, tigerlily84
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#9
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feeling incredibly silly. everything I do is so ridiculous. even posting.
...okay here is good things about today so far: -mild strong wind outside -was outside and had a coffee on the street -saw old people who are moving even more slowly than me -we looked at the same shopwindow, seem to adapt, like the idea of being old women -thought for a second this morning I might just stubbornly continue doing what I want ignoring complete failure (really only a second) -uploaded image (that counts as a success!) -o yeah, forgot to mention: got up -shared ideas of what is good about today |
![]() Bark, Clara22, hope2010, VMblue
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![]() Avatar10, Bark, Clara22, hope2010, Pikku Myy
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#10
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Really not doing well. I'm starting to cry. My techniques to cope are not working. Yesterday's s thought set me off. I really hate my life, but have to accept it. Why can't i? Been on the road to think positive and I can't. The advice given is talk about it...so tired of talking about it.
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![]() Anonymous37855, Bark, birdpumpkin, Clara22, Pikku Myy, raspberry00
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#11
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Getting closer and closer to my move to another town and becoming less and less able to function. My stomach is in knots and all I want to do is play on the computer.
__________________
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell |
![]() Bark, Fuzzybear, Pikku Myy, regretful
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#12
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Still ok here
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![]() Fuzzybear
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![]() Avatar10, Bark
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#13
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(deleted)
...
__________________
![]() Last edited by Fuzzybear; Jul 15, 2014 at 01:10 PM. |
![]() Bark
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#14
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Quote:
You are not alone, may be will help to focus more in your own feelings and see how to cope with your MH as much as its sucks ![]() ![]()
__________________
A smile is an inexpensive way to change your looks. – Charles Gord ![]() |
![]() Bark, Pikku Myy
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![]() Avatar10
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#15
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I am sleepy, tired and in some kind of different level of pain every single day!
Due to new medication side effects for a physical illness, plus my medications for depression and anxiety and there is more, medications for pain too. What else?
__________________
A smile is an inexpensive way to change your looks. – Charles Gord ![]() |
![]() Bark, Pikku Myy
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#16
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Scared. Panicked. Sick to my stomach
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![]() Anonymous445852, Bark, Pikku Myy
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#17
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Well the past few days have been good. It looks likely that I will finally find a job at a great legal firm for the summer as one seems to be really interested in me, so that has brightened my mood considerably.
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__________________
Diagnosis: Bipolar Type I w\ psychotic features, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder Medications: 0mg Prozac (Thank God), 10mg Zyprexa, 100mg Lamictal XR (for now may adjust as needed), 2mg Klonopin ![]() |
![]() Avatar10, Bark, lizzyjb, Pikku Myy, tigerlily84
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#18
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Dizzy, tired, thinking the antidepressants are doing nothing but zapping my energy. Wish I could just disappear. Want to stop feeling sorry for myself, want to move but feel like I can't get up to do what needs doing. And there's too many things.
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![]() Bark, Pikku Myy, tigerlily84
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![]() Avatar10
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#19
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Just focus on one thing. I know harder than it sounds right. I have days where even one full thing overwhelms me, but that's when I break it down to one step at a time. If that's too hard focus on breathing in and out. It does get better just takes a while.
__________________
PTSD possible bipolar Meds: propranalol 20mg 2x's(blood pressure), lamictal 300mg, seroquel 100mg, effexor 75mg, sprycel 100mg (CML, chronic myeloid leukemia), iron supplement, multivitamin ![]() |
![]() Anonymous445852
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![]() Bark
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#20
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Mood a bit on the low side, I hope this isn't the start of another relapse. I'm usually either depressed or in remission not this halfway house of good spells and then bad spells. Hopefully, I'll be OK once I've got used to this new (to me) manifestation.
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![]() Bark, Pikku Myy
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#21
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Can't take this anymore. Reaching my breaking point. Not sure I can handle one more day like this. Not sure I can stand another week of this summer 'vacation'. I never imagined depression could feel like this. I literally feel like I cannot breathe. At this point, I'm not even sure anymore whether my chest and my stomach and my head hurt because of depression, anxiety, or the eating disorder. All I know is that everything hurts and I just want to sleep. But I can't even manage to do that long enough to get pleasure from it.
__________________
Love is.. OSFED|MDD/PPD|GAD|gender dysphoria|AvPD a baby smiling at you for the first time a dog curling up by your side... and your soulmate kissing your forehead when he thinks you're sound asleep |
![]() Bark, Pikku Myy, tigerlily84
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#22
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Today kinda sucked, it started out ok...I was at my dads and then decided to head back to my house and pick up my valium refill on the way back. Well I couldn't access bus scedules on my phone and had no internet outside that so ended up just missing a bus going the way I needed so walked what I estimate to be at least half a mile if not more to get to the lightrail train station which that bus would have taken me to. Got to the pharmacy to get the prescription and ended up having to run to the bathroom to vomit right as I was finishing my transaction....was already having digestive discomfort, constipation and some cramping due to my period starting so last thing I needed was severe nausea. Finally got home after calling my mom to give me a ride after I puked vomited again and it started raining.
I feel a little better now but still being careful not to eat or drink anything that might aggravate the nausea but am kinda hungry.
__________________
Winter is coming. |
![]() Bark, Pikku Myy
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#23
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Somehow I will manage. My sweetheart is having a hard time coping. I will help him, and we will be alright. I have to get him out of the hospital and home. I am holding up pretty good. I know I have to.
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![]() Bark, dandylin, eggplantlife, Pikku Myy, tigerlily84
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![]() Bark
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#24
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Finally going to start therapy thanks to my parents help. Don't know what I'd do without them. I hope it will do me some good. My anxiety was probably at a 7 on a scale of 1 - 10 today for some unknown reason. Starting my son on ADHD meds tomorrow which I'm really apprehensive about. Tried once 5 years ago, and my wild and active child turned into a zombie. I preferred my wild child and took him back off it after 2 days. I'm feeling pressured to do this by the doctor and my parents. It's for his learning, not his hyperactivity, which really isn't too bad. He seems happy, and I don't want that to change. I'm afraid it will. I don't want to sacrifice his personality for his learning if there can be other ways to help him without medicine. My family don't understand. I suppose they will see tomorrow what I mean if he reacts the same way to this medicine when we visit tomorrow. I'm really nervous about this. Good news - found a small blackberry patch near the house...
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![]() Bark, eggplantlife, Pikku Myy, tigerlily84
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![]() Bark, lizzyjb, tigerlily84
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#25
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I'm running a fever. I think all of the stress about moving back into my dad's house in a few weeks is making me sick.
I tried looking into really cheap apartments in random parts of the country where you can get a studio for like $400/month. I have some freelance writing prospects that I think would net me enough to be able to swing that while I continue applying to jobs, but of course places have huge application fees and require you to provide proof of a steady income to apply. I just feel like the universe is working against me and wants me to be miserable. |
![]() Bark, eggplantlife, Pikku Myy, tigerlily84
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