too :(

Is it too "late" for anyone? Is anyone "too old" or too "useless" to heal? A professional therapist told me I was "old" when I was 30 something. I do not understand the cruelty in this world. I don't belong in this world. I don't want to belong in this world.

Despite all the abusers and traumatic events in my life, two and a half years ago I still felt "young" and was working towards "significant changes"

Now, for several reasons, I feel old. My body is falling apart and I...ugh. What is the point

I honestly am with you on this one Fuzzy, I feel like I'm falling apart at times, physically and mentally. I have some renewed hope. We have to, even though it sounds selfish, make ourselves a priority somehow.
I'm sorry for all that you have been through. I don't know everything about your struggles but I hate to see anyone suffer. If there was a way to erase suffering it would seem wonderful. But it makes us at least be able to understand each other somewhat. I'm sorry I'm not much help. I'm trying to find ways myself to hang on. But I do get the health falling apart. It isn't too late, please don't think that way. Things physically can get worse, I'll admit that. But you are more than that... wish I had the right word but I don't.

When I was younger and stronger, it was easier to consider wrestling with my mind and emotions. Now, accumulating physical problems increasingly drain my tiny reserves of focus and energy.

I currently remain committed to go on because it still benefits a few others, and because I want to try not to surrender to despair.

((((((( Fuzzybear! )))))))

Hi Fuzzy, OK I don't know your age but let's agree that when you reach 150 you'll be "too old", hey??
And you are not useless, you are incredibly strong, even if it doesn't feel like it right now.
So until you hit 150.............well people can change their outlook at any stage in their life with the right help, with time..........I am so sorry that you've seen/experienced so much cruelty, but you know the whole world isn't like that, and there are pockets of it (like here!!!) that show amazing caring and support............that go way beyond age/beyond numbers.
So please don't give up on yourself reaching for/finding support, healing..........we definitely aren't giving up on you!!!!!
I'm sure it's not easy after some of the things you've been through, but that doesn't need to make it impossible.
And as for your body falling apart............you're a lot more than your body, right?? So much more to you than that!!!!!



Alison

Hi Fuzzybear. I remember near my lowest point driving and listening to a program about depression on NPR and having to hear that my hippocampus is shrinking, that depression is a life-long condition, that the only hope it to manage the symptoms. I also felt like my body was falling apart. I could barely function. It was really awful. I also tried many things with only partial successes at best. I tried everything the experts said, but nothing got me out of it. I believed the experts. It FELT like a chemical imbalance in my brain. I was dragging myself through life.

That was the way it was. This is a message to you, dear Fuzzybear, from the other side. I am probably older than you, but my depression is now essentially completely dissolved. The relief I feel is just amazing. It is as if I had been chained to something for my whole life and now the chains are finally cut. I am no longer tortured by thoughts and feelings. I am not afraid anymore. I am not afraid of my own thoughts and feelings. I feel SAFE in the world. I am not afraid of anything that might or might not happen to me in the future. I no longer have those horrible feelings of helplessness in social situations. I feel healthier than ever and full of power and vitality. Even just sitting quietly, I feel my body healing itself and gathering energy. My thoughts and even my senses feel sharper. I feel like being depressed was a constant drain on my body as well as on my mind, even when I wasn't actively feeling negative things.

What your therapist told you is just factually wrong. You CAN cut those chains and it makes no difference how old you are at all. Fuzzy, have a look at this, it describes how I escaped:

http://forums.psychcentral.com/depre...n-escaped.html

and see if it rings true for you. It is so easy to try, I think it's worth it to try. I really think I have this figured out, Fuzz, but even if I am wrong or it doesn't work for you, the most important thing I want to say to you is to keep actively searching for something that works for you. Don't be satisfied with "managing your condition." Don't wait for the experts. They don't really know what they are doing. If SNAP CLUB hadn't worked so spectacularly for me, for instance, I would have a serious try at meditation. I think that this is very promising as well. You can see that people report that it really works and no one who gives it a solid try is saying that it didn't help at all. Exercise and improving your diet always helps also. Most of the things that are known to help depression are great for you anyway.

Also, as I always say, see post #45 in the thread above and be active about improving your health and checking for medical nutritional issues. I actually had one of these, and fixing this was part of how I got better.

SNAP! - vital

You're not alone in this Fuzzy. There are times where I feel like I've aged mentally. Not in the gotten wiser type, but the facade has started to crumble kind.

Hi Fuzzy, sometimes I feel old too. Like today it is damp and chilly. Migraines and arthritis attacked me. But we can't give in. We just do our best. I don't think it is ever too late. It's never to late to learn something new, try something different, or seek a solution.

Love and hugs to you fuzzy. You are the best.

Hi Fuzzy, almost nothing's unspeakable on here!!
Do you think it would help if you checked out the forums for anyone going through the same thing and shared your feelings with them, in a PM??? Sometimes it helps to share..............
Unless of course you want to talk about it here..............????
As for the doctor though, well I guess it's easy to "shrug off" something, it's not their body.
But it is your body, and if whatever it is bothering you, well you have a right to feel that way. Although with a little extra support..................???
You know you've probably come through a lot worse though, so just don't forget that, hey??
Alison

thanks Alison, I deleted my post (re scary medical issue )

I hope not...

Dear dearest FUZZY WUZZY WOZZY bear. We all so LOVE YOU here and I'm sure I speak for everyone when I say you are a valued member here, always ready to listen, no matter what you are going through. I've had serious mental health issues for well over 33 years, brining me up to 55, soon to be 56. My body is now beginning to show it's age, NOT in the normal way, but because of a direct result of the things I ''had'' to do to help me stop loosing my mind ~~ when the Psych Dr's couldn't come up with anything better than ''oh she's just an attention seeker''!!!! Reality is that only five years ago I was officially diagnosed BPD!! Yes, my hands are becoming fed up being used, LOL, it's common arthritis but it sure does limit what one can do. Oh and the stiff back. especially bad after resting in one position too long, teeth leaving their gum spaces and very thin hair!! So, I guess there's no real set age to be older, old or otherwiser, it's a very personal thing FUZZ, but I do so agree with you on this subject. When I have more time I want to read that article one of our members wrote as a link a few posts back, seemed like good old fashioned sound advice. LOVE YOU FUZZ, chin up babe, chin up. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Hi Fuzzy, sometimes things/feelings are way more scary when you're keeping them to yourself or "bottling them up".
And you know "going it alone" can be so isolating/allow those feelings to intensify
I know you've probably talked to doctors, but when it comes to people who are there in the moment or who've been there you might get a bit more actual/close up and personal understanding, insight, support...............
Not that you necessarily have to go into any detail if it's really personal to you, but maybe if you check out other threads/posts on what you're going through a bit more, and maybe ask some "vague" questions you might want to ask, if you feel able to. You know, I'd say we're really non-judgmental and open here if that concerns you at all
So, if it's still bothering you......................
And of course even if I/some people on here haven't got the same issues we still care about you, so if you want to give us a shot, I'm sure we'll do our best to support you.
So just.............whenever/whatever you feel comfortable in saying if you want to, anytime.

Alison

((((((Fuzzybear))))))