[Rose76]

My grief over losing my s.o. is devastating me. I'm in a psych bosp that has nice staff. Other patients are also nice to me. Tomorrow I return to my apartment. Being there alone is something I dread.

I never, ever expected that losing my s.o. would do what it's doing to me.

I'm losing self-respect to see myself falling apart like this.

I have felt lonely today, and like no one is really that interested in talking to me. it also feels like my 2 newest friends are on the verge of abandoning me, and aside from that, I can't help feel a sense of sadness re: my body. it hurts, deffently hurts, it is ugly, it is fat, it is shutting down, and it's creaky

and i'm in my ****ing 20's

hardly seems that fair

it is amazing the things that depress me.

I have just finished listening to a radio advert about children brushing their teeth for 2 minits twice a day to help protect them from tooth loss

and immediately thought... well, not even I do that, I didn't even do that as a child. my teeth probably won't last long (the amount of time they have lasted is shocking all ready)

and I am beyond depressed about the fact that it's now another weekend, everyone is doing stuff but me!. again!

[3rd rock]

I ate too much for dinner and now I don't want to move. I'm too tired.

[Rose76]

I got through the day with no hysterical sobbing, so maybe I've turned a corner.

I don't feel good.

I am in physical agony (basically all over my body), emotionally I feel triggered because someone used the name of one of my abusers on a letter they sent me (by mistake, but it wasn't very funny), I've not slept because the pain limits me lying down, and the weekend's just gone. all I've done with it is the same I do every other weekend. **** all

Very busy day yesterday. I didn't post on here but wanted to. Yesterday started off right as I went shopping early and just got in and out quickly with time to spare and more money leftover than I thought I would have . And then I did the laundry and no one else was using it, so that made it very easy. Then lunch was good.

But after lunch, my luckiness had taken a reverse. My friend called and then he cut me off quickly because a friend has just shown up. My email went down. And I got some rudeness from my neighbors. All I did was ask if the mail had come and they replied like "don't bother me". And the checks I was expecting didn't come. I felt very down in the afternoon and into the evening, even though I watched a pretty good movie at night.

This morning has gone well so far. I went to the store to pick up a few things that I should have picked up yesterday. Got half off for sunscreen, which was a tremendous savings! And once again, got in and out quickly. Very hot outside again today and it's been that way for a while. I'm tired of this heat!

[tigerlily84]

Feeling crappy. My mom is here so we may go to the grocery store. She offered to pay fkr my groceries. She is already paying for my car insurance this month. I feel so useless. Meanwhile the short term disability is taking forever to process. I'm glad I put the stimulus check and my tax refund into savings, otherwise I wouldn't be able to pay for rent and my car payment. But after that I have no money coming in.

[Rose76]

Today was not awful. It really wasn't . . . not even close to awful.

Right now, I'm very greatful for that.

[Breaking Dawn]

I'm doing fairly well today.

[Yzen]

I didn't feel like myself this weekend...such a difference than last weekend.

in all ghonestly

Possible trigger:

not sure why I am even breathing

I have been awake all night with bad pain and flashbacks, and my only thing I'm doing today is eating some ****ing fruit, all day

I mean it's beyond pointless

[Breaking Dawn]

Hi. Well, yesterday I had to go out to do some shopping at the market for things I really needed. I dreaded it but it went ok. And today I'm glad I did it. So that's a positive. But I do seem to have a bit of a problem with worrying about things. I'm trying to fix that by using CBT tricks, & that helps. I just guess sometimes it's a bit harder than other times.

I'm feeling I'll physically but hopeful my doctor is treating the right thing. I'm stressed as things didn't work out as planned.. I'm sick, you would think your own father who knew I went to the doc would ask me how I'm feeling. What a brother I have too. Done vent

[tigerlily84]

I didn't get to the grocery store yesterday because I could barely do much more than sleep almost the entire day. I felt better in the afternoon and helped my mom cook. I feel a bit better today. After dropping her off at her job this morning I went to the grocery store and used her card to buy groceries for the week. I'm lucky to have her.

A fairly busy day at work, which was pretty nice for me. When I got home, I felt depressed. Worked out at home. On Friday I have a Doctor's appointment for a routine check up and I'm dreading it.

feel terrible.

their's just nothing going on, and even if their was what am I meant to do with a body that just hurts.

yesterday I tried a new recipie (the lemon chicken I posted in another section othe forum), it was okay, but left me still hungry, so I first had some fries, and when that didn't feel me up, I had snacks- a lot of snacks.

another night with no sleep either. litirally none. not even the oppotunity to lie down

I slept but now I have more pain. I need to rest but I have so much to do. I'll do what I can today.

[Breaking Dawn]

Hi. Doing ok right now.

[tigerlily84]

I felt okay this morning, crappy but okay. Now I feel like I'm in a depressive stupor. Depression hasn't been this bad in a while. I wonder if it's the meds? I'll have to tell the nurse practitioner at my appointment on Thursday. I also heard back from the short term disability company, and I should have some guidance and information by the end of the week. That's all I have energy for at the moment. Maybe I'll go back to bed.

[Rose76]

Putting off doing things is making me miserable.

[Mountaindewed]

I haven’t felt depressed like this in awhile. I don’t have any SI though like I usually would and I don’t feel like I need to go to the hospital. I honestly don’t even know what I need and I can’t even tell exactly what is wrong. I think it has something to do with therapy. I got my haircut at a salon today which may have set me off. Maybe I’m just depressed for no reason. Melatonin does not interest me tonight for some reason even though it always does.

[Breaking Dawn]

I guess I'm doing ok right now. I really enjoyed watching two tv programs today that I like. And I had a nice dinner.

[Nitrous]

Having a bad day. Obsessive thoughts, drug cravings, thoughts of SH. I wish i had someone to talk to.

well, I'm not really depressed. The job helps to keep my mind focused on the future. Depressiion is still there but its less. I was finally able to read something and watch an interesting show. Hugs to all