Confessions of little turtle with love #5

i like that we are talking about the relationship that we have with ourselves...
it may be the most important person we need to get along with...
i get very defensive with my wife...i am trying to understand why i react this way...
65 years and i am still trying to learn about this stuff...

i am over this anger...no fight...back to usual

Thirty Shades, is EMDR where you visualize the traumatic event and then try to visualize calming yourself down, or as you might say, releasing the pain, via an apparatus with different colored lights?

If it is I have done it once and found it helpful.

I have not done it yet Mopey.

I believe it does release pain trapped in our sub conscious using eye movements.

If you don't mind saying, how long ago did you have it Mopey? Have you had lasting help from EMDR?

[QUOTE=Thirty shades;6901644]I have not done it yet Mopey.

I believe it does release pain trapped in our sub conscious using eye movements.

If you don't mind saying, how long ago did you have it Mopey? Have you had lasting help from EMDR? [/QUOTE]

Thirty, I had it about 3 years ago for a specific situation I was unable to put behind me. The procedure was helpful, and just the idea that I COULD do something to ease my own pain was helpful as well. (Before that I don't think I thought that was possible and to my surprise it was).

I also made up my mind that every time a thought came to me about this situation I would send it to God, because I realized it was beyond my power to resolve and too painful to think about. I prayed that God would handle the situation for me, as I did not have the tools to make everything better all by myself.

Now I realize that (a) you may not believe in "God" and (b) these 2 paragraphs may sound a little contradictory. But the first has to do with calming your own feelings, while the second has to do with a resolution of the total situation, which is usually beyond the reach of just one individual.

And yes, the help has been permanent. ( HUGS )

I am going to try it Mopey. I am hoping it will help. I also have a situation that needs to be resolved too...

I don't personally believe in god but I am glad if it helps you.

Much love to all on the AS IS Bus

we shouldn't be ASHAMED of how things are for us...
we shouldn't hide out...it is time to come out...
i have lived a very messy life...i screwed up so many times...
but i am not a bad person...

Good post dear little turtle

NO MORE SHAME We should NOT be ASHAMED

We are not bad people...

Much love to all on the as is bus

Good posts.

It is time we came out, I agree.

We are good people with a malfunctioning brain.

I am not sure the world is ready to hear us but we must speak our truth.

Much love to you both and all on the As Is bus

how do you like to be treated-------? FRIENDLY

I like to be treated in a kind way....

SOMEWHERE-----a time and place for us

If they all could just understand us.....

No judgement, just the real truth...

A world where everyone matters...

what do you think about this one----------------
POGO said "we have met the enemy...and he is us"

We are our own's worst enemy???

There may be some truth.
We may have been brought up in bad environment's without being taught how to be our own best friend...
It is not all there is to it.

Some people are not kind, this does not help us...

I love Pogo little turtle-remember Sarcophagus Macabre, the vulture?

But I don’t agree with him on this one. I think we spend far too much time blaming ourselves for everything as it is.

mopey why do we keep blaming ourselves....i don't understand

Good post dear Thirty shades

I am also unsure why we keep blaming ourselves...

I speculate that at least in part it is because “they” (family of origin and some others...) are.. sub optimal and were unable to accept a young cub as is

I wonder what Rohag has to say on this page of the bus. Rohag is very wise (as are others on the bus)

I agree with this

My guess, turtle, would be that when we tried to express ourselves as cubs we were given the impression that whatever the problem was, it was of our own making, not our tormentors. That is, there was something wrong with us or with our approach.

I can think of an example. When I was a young child walking home I was approached and made fun of by a gang of kids. I was very upset and rushed home to tell my mother. She responded with annoyance, "Oh, just let it roll off your back."

From this I understood that I was taking the whole thing too seriously and should not have been upset at all. IE, I was too sensitive.

thanks mopey

Pessimism. Any opinion I might offer here would be tainted by my own general and self-pessimism.

Everyone posting here has survived. Though painful, that survival is not to be dismissed.

I am not mental illness.

My body shouts its pain loud and clear with a great deal of grrrrrrrr. Then expresses itself with anxiety and depression to cope with all that is trapped inside.

My core self is in hiding.

She is lost and when I am ready I will try and find her.

We are good people.

Much love and respect to all on the As Is bus

very important TS...how to deal with your own stuff...
you are working on it...i want to treat myself kindly...
i think that i need to practice the golden rule with me first...
love myself...love is patient...love is kind...i hope that we all can be FREE