Depression Vent Room for Misfits

Punishments for any ''transgression'' - real or imagined, is an adequate descriptor of my cubhood and ''adolescence'' (I was ''never'' allowed to be a ''teenager'' - the mother even said she HATED that word

Trying to ''live in the moment'' (which is not optimal... due to ******** and some people's selfishness But I'm grateful for my blessings

Sending your cub empathy, hugs and respect Fuzzybear.

People who trigger with acts of selfishness

If only our hearts were seen in their true light.

Some transgressions are provoked

Other trangressions are designed to trigger a reaction

I hide from the world.

I guess this means I am a misfit

It is safer that way because there are lots of triggers out there.

God bless all of you. And thank you for being here!!

Good post Thirty shades

It is hard to have ''endless'' patience towards those who trigger with acts of selfishness I think we both have ''several'' examples of this in our current and ''past'' life.

I'm sending your cub empathy, hugs and respect (grouphug)

I prefer not to use any labels. (especially not vague labels like ''misfit'') I understand what you mean though dear Thirty shades.

I agree, there are, and always have been, a lot of triggers out there

I'm really struggling. I don't know what the answer is. I'm not sure if I just need DBT, a med change or a change in perspective. I don't like med changes.

My health journey won’t allow me to lie, and I find my life very difficult to talk about. I will continue to stand for what I believe in- without nasty forms of retaliation that seem to be the way most people get by.

Should I feel quilty about praying that I die naturally in my sleep? Don't want my son, long time girlfriend, & brother to be more ashamed of me. I'm not strong enough to ask for help at this stage. I know what is offered if I end up in hospital again. Art class, other groups offered can't help me.

Thank you. Thought I had already thanked you. Take care.

Guilt has the potential to be a pretty toxic emotion, so go easy on that. Since you're here posting about your feelings, I'd say that's a pretty good step towards getting some help...even though this is just a virtual platform. In addition, since you pray you must have faith in something, which is a definite plus. I share your your reservations about hospitalization, though. Hang in there & keep checking in here, Saunder. Reaching out is a strength, not a weakness.

Thank you TunedOut. Having trouble doing simple things on this site. Thought I had previously thanked you for prayers. Take care

I can relate. I hide from the world too. Each interaction is stressful. The more time passes, the more I want to retreat.

Dear @Saunder, The way you're feeling is very sad. I hope you will start to feel stronger & more hopeful soon. Do you have anyone you can talk to, a therapist, a friend? I myself have felt this way & I got better later. I think some encouragement from the right person could make a difference & help give you the strength you need. Please hang in there, ok? And meanwhile we are here for you.

Today I am tired and stressed out. That is not helping my depression. The increase in my AD is not helping anymore. I see my pnurse next week. I'm afraid to ask for a change. Her last suggestion was to put me on a med not covered by my insurance.

So sorry, Saunder My heart goes out to you Those thoughts are a natural reaction to your pain and exhaustion. Please do keep interacting as much as you can here, and be assured that you are amongst people who want to help

I'm sorry Saunder I think those thoughts are a natural part (or result) of your exhaustion and pain. (I have not been in hospital but I would find the thought scary) People here understand and want to listen. Big hugs

tough ''love''

I do not think this is ''love'' at all

I don't really feel as though I belong anywhere, that I don't fit in. I hope I can fit in here.

Mood is so low at the moment. Haven't seen anyone f2f (apart from OH) for 11 months, all MH appointments got cancelled and CPN reduced phone contact down to once a month, even though she knows I've been struggling with very dark thoughts. It looks as though 1st vaccinations for everyone 50 and above may not be until May, which means 2nd dose won't be until August. That's another 6 months of no in person contact. I don't know how I'm going to make it.

Fuzzy in the rain

Sorry, East17, that's a really tough situation. No wonder you're struggling

You certainly do fit in here, though