[BlackTears]

As a child my parents never took me to the doctors or the dentist. So im 26 and I have slightly crooked teeth ( their not the worst and certainly not good). I have been with my husband and hes a very attractive man. Their are always young girls flirting with him and some do it in front of me like im not even their. Most girls who talk to him dont talk to me at all dont make any attempt to talk to me or get to know me...This has always been a factor in our relationship. I always think that he can do so much better then me and be with someone prettier and with straight teeth..Im very sensitive about my teeth. Ive seen worst cases then mine but to me im just so ugly. Im so self concious that it plays a big part in my marriage. I always think my husband wants someone better then me and prettier then me. My husband dosnt do anything to make me think that, but its always their. His brothers have real hight maintnance pretty girls and hear I am dont fit into their picture at all, Im not all about clothes or my hair and nail( I like that stuff but im a mother and my children will always have before me, so usually all extra goes to them). So next month im going to get braces and im so excited because maybe ill feel like I fit in more and be more confident about myself. I hate thinking my husband dosnt want me and im tired of always feeling so ugly...Ive been working nonstop so I can save a good bit of money, so im not stuck with a big bill. My insurance pays a good bit. But a little part of me keeps thinking something is going to happen and im not going to get them. Like im suppose to be this way forever feeling ugly and self consious.......

[healer2011]

Hey there, I know what it's like to have something about you that makes you feel less pretty than you would like to! I think its great that you are getting braces and trying to do something about an issue that bothers you.

Here's the only thing. I think it is possible that when you are done and the braces are on, you may end up finding something else that you can change so you don't feel "unpretty". I think that there is nothing wrong with changing your looks (losing or gaining weight, getting braces, etc...) so long as you know that it won't make the problems you had before go away. If you are feeling somewhat unsure of yourself now and are feeling somewhat insecure about your husband's love now these things may not go away. It might worth it to talk through some of your insecurities about your relationship with your husband with a counselor or good friends.

[nowheretorun]

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But a little part of me keeps thinking something is going to happen and im not going to get them. Like im suppose to be this way forever feeling ugly and self consious.......

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or something better might happen.. hang in there Black Tears.. you're on the right trail.. feeling good about who we are is very important..

[Fuzzybear]

You hubby chose you because of who you are and he finds you beautiful .... i can relate to feelings of insecurity. Maybe it would be a good idea to tell him how you're feeling just to put your own mind at rest ..... ((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))there's nothing wrong with putting things right that we are unhappy with .... tc, love Jinny xx

[DOWNINNATICK]

I know exactly how you feel, I feel so much the same way and girls flirt with my husband in front of me and never say a word to me. I have buck teeth, so it's good that you're getting braces to help your teeth, but beauty is not always on the outside it comes from within, and that is the beauty your husband fell in love with. He will love you no matter what, and yes you should sit down with him and talk to him about your feelings and if you can't do it alone, do it with a counselor. An with beauty, we can't see ourselves that way but others can, so you must praise yourself, and love yourself.

To us true beauties, look, mind and hearts.

[Soidhonia]

Hello BT. I am glad to hear that you are working towards something positive in your life. this is going to be a big change of course. also I just wanted to say this about the other women flirting with your husband. These women are very ignorant and insecure themselves to even go after your husband, and to them you dont even exist, and that is why they dont talk to you. YOU need to work on saving your marriage and feel better about yourself, and not as much time on your husband in having feelings for ignorant and stupid women, and hopefully your therapist can teach you to be prepared when this happens. It has nothing to do with you but someone elses insecurity and stupidity. Good to see you posting and accepting advice for your issues. Take care BT. PM anytime. Soidhonia