[Tormented_Lilah]

So I can't take jokes...I get angry easily...so what. I don't think I'm gunna be going back to that chat room any time soon. Those people are making me feel really really bad, and making me hurt. I just wanted to know their age they don't have to be so mean about it joking or not! I can't take jokes Im not very stable right now....why does everyone everywhere always pick on me... im prolly just overexaggerating... u guys are all prolly gunna tell me to shuttup and stop whining....why me...?...what I do..? I must be really bad.... ...........

* curls up and cries *

[h0kie]

I'm sorry you are feeling upset Lilah. Many people, when they get older, don't want to give their exact age. So they make a joke. I know I do that when I don't feel like sharing my age.

They really don't mean it to hurt your feelings. I enjoyed talking to you this afternoon in the chatroom. I hope I get to again. I'm glad you're here.

[Tormented_Lilah]

....the one said he/she was 16...and made joke on that im only a year younger...then they said, what do you like being young....and they keep calling me youngin...and making fun of my alters and me...saying " She switches fast " .... and the ages of them....15...17...and 20.... they said " oh thats so text book " andd some other stuff........ .... .......

Lilah,

I think I met you in chat the other day and you asked me the basics. Some people here do not want to give their age or other vitals and that is just their business. Others will offer it up freely.

I am sorry if you are feeling picked on in chat. I'm glad you came here and posted about it. That's the first step in all of us trying to understand each other.

I hear that you are hurt and feeling really bad right now. I'm sorry you feel that way.

I wouldn't tell you to hush up about this. This is important enough to post and work out so fooey to anyone who says shutup.

I think when you asked me in chat you asked a/s/l and that can sometimes be mistaken as rude questions. I replied with a joke at first saying I'm older than dirt/I think I can remember what sex is/and living in a state of insanity ...........or something like that.

That's just my humour! I did not mean to offend you. And I think I did answer seriously soon thereafter. I know that I did not make fun of you in chat at any point. The above example is something that was my attempt at humour. Sorry if it fell flat.

Take care Lilah.

[h0kie]

(((((Lilah)))))

I'm very sorry you had a bad chatroom experience.

If you have a problem in there you can always PM DocJohn or one of the moderators. If you save the chat, you can send that too. They're really great here, they'll take care of it.

If it gets really bad, you can also leave. Don't let other people make you feel bad. You don't deserve that. You're younger than some of the people here, but that is ok.

[Tormented_Lilah]

you did not offend me, because that was a joke...but these people said 365 and such...in a jerk that was intend ed for hurt ( how i see it ) and then the one said 16 and they started going off on why i always asked and stuff saying some stuff i cant really remeber....and then they made fun of my multiples and got in a fight with lee.......... .........

Ok, now I get what is happening here. Is there anyone from that chat who has saved the session?

If people in chat are making fun of dissociation that is NOT OK HERE!!

Report it to Doc John.

This board and chat are not places to tease others about the very illnesses we come here for support!



I'm very sorry Lilah and I hope someone from that chat has saved the session or can remember and speak up about this.

[nothemama8]

Lilah , I am DID and have been in chat many times , if you and I are there at the same time I will be by your side. Okay
Angie

[Tormented_Lilah]

I have the part saved...

[Tormented_Lilah]

but i dont want to give it...because lee was out and calling people names....

[Tormented_Lilah]

thankyou...

[nothemama8]

Is lee one of your alters, sweetie

[Tormented_Lilah]

Yes...and the angry one, nonetheless....

[silver_queen]

I don't know how Lee acted to the others in chat, but she was talking with me and she was ok.

[Tormented_Lilah]

I don't really remeber myself but reviewing the chat I did / she did save...she called them names....

[Wants2Fly]

Hello Lilah -- I was in chat for a little while this afternoon. You were not asking about ages at that time. I didn't stay long. I like to just bounce in sometimes and bounce out. I get curious to see who is there, but don't always want to stay for a chat. Kind of like sticking your head in the door to someone's office to say -- and then going on to one's cubicle.

I guess I wouldn't like it if someone started asking me personal questions about age, sexuality, etc. I would try not to answer, or laugh it off as other's apparently did. I am so sorry that their attempts to be light-hearted hurt you. I feel certain that this was a misunderstanding.

Certainly making fun of someone's alters is NOT Okay. I'm glad there are more experienced people here who know how to handle the situation by saving the conversation and informing Dr. John.

I would like to ask some questions as someone who has zero, zip, experience with multiples or people who suffer from this terrible kind of dissociation.

If I am in the chat room -- and someone starts calling me names as the alter Lee apparently did -- how is an uninformed person in chat to behave? Had this happened to me, I probably would have left. I would not have been able to take it.

But if someone responds aggressively to that alter -- how can the person know that an alter is at work here?

That still doesn't make making fun of you okay, Lilah. No way.

I am so sorry this happened to you. I love the people I meet at the forums so much. I feel certain that this is all a misunderstanding -- a serious misunderstanding but nonetheless not something that originated in ill will toward you, Lilah.

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((Lilah)))))))))))))))))))))))))))

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
I would like to ask some questions as someone who has zero, zip, experience with multiples or people who suffer from this terrible kind of dissociation.

If I am in the chat room -- and someone starts calling me names as the alter Lee apparently did -- how is an uninformed person in chat to behave? Had this happened to me, I probably would have left. I would not have been able to take it.

But if someone responds aggressively to that alter -- how can the person know that an alter is at work here?

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">
Great question Wants2Fly. With Lilah's permission I'd like to pose that question in a new thread over in the Diss. forum. I think it is a good way for those that wish to respond or have insight into this to help all of us better understand.

[nothemama8]

Usually when we're in chat we tell folks who it is. We're like a box of chocolate you never know who your going to get.
Angie

[Tormented_Lilah]

Because I myself stated I had alters...when we were discussing age, and lee stated she was lee. They do that, to inform people...Instead of taking into consideration of that though, they made rude remarks about it. Such as " 15, 17, 20...That's so textbook " and " Hi youngun " just because I asked about their age. If someone feels uncomfortable telling they could just say I'd rather not tell, like with name...if they don't want to tell, they don't have to. It's not appropriate to go and make rude offensive comments about things though... v_v

[Tormented_Lilah]

You can if you want....

[Tormented_Lilah]

yeah..

[downsolong]

Hi,

I think I was in chat at the time you referred to and don't recall anyone making fun of you. I do recall people making jokes to try to lighten the mood, as we tried to get to know each other.

For those of us who aren't farmilar with multiples it is very confusing to understand the difference between saying we sometimes feel that we are part different ages and multiples who actually think they are made up of different aged parts. Where as unified personalities tend to joke about their younger and older selves because they see it clearly as a figure of speech or perspective, in my understanding (which is very limited at this point) multiples see things very differently. I don't know if this makes any sense to you, I'm just trying to understand and assure you that I for one ment no ridicule towards you.

I hope you are feeling a little better about this now. Wishing you well.
~Down

[Tormented_Lilah]

We feel better now...the part that was getting hurt was Ambe...and ambe's only 7.... ._.