Nobody Wants to help me

...and and and they wonder why I'm suicidal. I thought I had a good lead for for for a new T and and and I opened up to to to him in an email but but but he recommended that that that I see somebody else. Why is is is it so hard to to to get help. And and and people wonder why I'm suicidal. I've never been through so so so much just trying to to to get help...suicide is looking to to to be the the the only answer at at at this point. I don't care anymore and and and I'm crying. Has any one else had had had such a hard time getting help??? I'm giving up.

I had a hard time getting help as well. 21 years seeking a cure. I know what's needed to correct the problems but no way to obtain the needed help. Hope you find someone to help. Perhaps opening up in an email to a T that you have not yet met, is a turn off. As desperate as you sound, you should check into a hospital. Nothing starts up the care like a person who may be suicidal.

(((((((((((((((((((((SambaKicks))))))))))))))))))))))

Sometimes it can take a while to find a therapist you can really connect with. Keep trying -- eventually you'll find someone.

In the meantime, have you tried calling your local crisis hotline? Some of them even have email addresses if you're uncomfortable speaking to a live person. You get instant relief in being able to pour out your feelings, and they will listen to you no matter what you have to say.

I agree with FerretGuy, please go to your ER if you're having thoughts of hurting yourself, or if you're feeling unsafe. There are professionals at the hospital who can also give you the instant help it sounds like you need just now.

Sending lots of hugs. Please take care.

doctors only pretend to to to care but but but they really don't...and and and i would never go to to to the the the ER because i will land back into those facilities which I hate. in florida they they they take you to baker act receiving facilities not a a a real hospital. and and and if you go to to to the hospital, you will be transfered there to to to the baker act facility. there is no no no hope. peace out y'all

There is always, always, always, always, ALWAYS hope. ALWAYS.

If you don't want to go to the hospital, that's all right. But you really should find some help. I can't stress how important that is. We suggested the hospital because we're worried about you, that's all.

I know what it feels like to have had enough, to want to give up, to think that there's nothing but darkness and despair in the world, to be too tired to put up with life anymore and to want nothing more to do with any of it. But I also know that THIS CAN BE BEATEN -- I forget who said it but proof that depression is beatable is in the number of people out there who have survived it. Try taking hope from the fact that it's not insurmountable and it's certainly not a death sentence. Things CAN get better. I believe in you, and I believe that you can beat this thing.

Other suggestions:
- Are there any support groups in your area? Some people have found those work very well.
- What about friends/family? Is there anyone close to you who can help you through this?
- If you'd rather stay away from face-to-face contact with people, don't forget your local helpline!
- If you're a reader or if there's someone who will read to you, there's a book called Sunbathing In The Rain that got me through the worst of my depression.
- Keep posting here! There are SO many people on PC who are/have been in the same position as you, who care and want to help and support you.

Please take care and be safe.

Please be okay! Please don't do anything that is PERMANENT! If you need someone to talk to come back here and talk to us! I agree it is difficult finding good mental health care, I finally found a good therapist who helps me a lot! Perhaps you can social services or NAMI and perhaps they can put you in contact with a clinic in your area...I know they are not the greatest but at least you could get some meds and some talk therapy until you can find something better!

Please let us know how you are doing!

Best Wishes,

TJ

Your frustration at trying to get the help that you need is actually an indication of something that is positive. Despite the scary thoughts that are swimming around in your head, you really haven't given up yet. You are still fighting because you are feeling this intense frustration.

It's when you are feeling absolutely NOTHING that you should be truly scared. You are feeling a lot of SOMETHING, and that means that your struggle is still ongoing. You are still trying to live and you haven't yet given up.

The T that "dumped" you was probably not too great anyway. So don't waste your tears on that clown.

oh, SambaKicks, please don't give up!!! I know you can do this, and judging by all the others who are posting here too, you've got lots of support and people who care and want you to be well again. It's a long road, but the fight to wellness is worth it.

I'm worried. Please let us know how you're doing. Sending oodles of hugs.

I promise to to to call the the the suicide hotline tomorrow . I will try to to to hang on. I decided to to to go to to to the only place that I know who will accept me and and and unfortunately it it it is that stupid Baker Act receiving facility in in in my hometown. They they they don't turn anybody down...I called them and and and they said that. Why am I such a bad person that that that is the only place who will accept me...I deserve to to to die.

My hubby bought me a Nano Ipod for for for my birthday and and and believe it or not it it it has helped me survive. I made an underground hip-hop and and and trip-hop killer mix that that that has helped me. Ah...the the the little things sometimes...

I am so glad that you're going to get help and that the music has helped you. Music helps me a lot too.

Don't forget that you are not a bad person, you are a GOOD one suffering from an illness. The ILLNESS is bad, not you, and by getting help you are taking the first steps in getting rid of that terrible illness so you can be healthy again.

Good luck!

Geez I'm so HAPPY TO HEAR FROM YOU! Music soothes my soul too and has helped me get through all of this madness! Please just take it one moment at a time, YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO DIE! I understand how you feel! I know how desperate you are feeling to get better and how tired you are of the same old thing, I get it but please just have faith. Have faith in yourself, have faith in your husband and family's love, have faith in us because we care about you!

Go to the facility and take a time out! I know it may not be the greatest but they are offering help so please take it!

You deserve happiness and good health, we all do!

Best Wishes,

TJ

(((SambaKicks76)))))) please seek help now. Please go to the ER or call the hotline back. They will take you right away. My sister lived in FL
Please for your safty go now
1-800-273 talk

I can't pick up the the the phone to to to call a hotline...they probably make fun of of of me how I talk. And and and I'm afraid they will send the the the police to to to my house to to to involuntarily hospitalize me. I can't go through through through that again. I don't want medicine and and and I don't want a psychiatrist and and and I don't want to to to go to the ER. It's my my my birthday and and and in so much pain.

You are still fighting don't give up the fight. I was depressed like you and was baker acted in FL. It was hard and painful but I came out of the hospital stronger and better than what I was. Meds have helped me. Granted they are not for everyone but sometimes they can be a life saver.
Keep trying and keep posting. You are not alone. You can make it through this.

Kayti

I'm sorry for your pain, especially on your birthday. Nevertheless, I wish you...

Happy Birthday!

SambaKicks,
You have assured people here that you will call the hotline, and mentioned that going to the Baker act facility is what you will probably have to do...

No trained counselor on a hotline would make fun of your speech pattern. They will work with you in every way possible.
Others call the hotline with their own speech problems of different kinds...

Give yourself the birthday gift that keeps giving--a new life with less pain.
You can make the decision to ease your pain by accepting the help that is available to you.
Easy? No.
Worth it? Yes.

There is only so much support we can give you here...IRL there are people more than willing to help you.
Our support and caring are valid and solid, but we cannot take the place of a therapist or any medical professional.

Please seek the help that is available to you, find resources that will help you, and try to understand that your depression is making you feel badly...but that you will feel better.

Posting here is a first step, take the next step of getting help in real life.

Peace,
Cap

Feeling better, thanks thanks thanks for everyone's support. My my my husband is is is helping me get through this and and and he left me flowers in in in my car this morning for for for my bday. Thanks everyone. I love all of of of you. Hugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SambaKicks,
I truly hope you are feeling better...

I read the pre-edit post from my email notification of new messages in threads I've posted in.
Baker Act facilities are stabilization units only, and I agree they can be unpleasant. The staff is usually caring for many patients and it's often hard for them to concentrate one on one. Unfortuantely, it's part of the problems of the mental health system in this country.
Finding a therapist can be a challenge, I know. Perhaps your physician can recommend one.
Therapists genuinely want to help their clients. It can happen where it's necessary to change if the client does not feel he/she is making progress.
No one is too risky to work with nor do therapists think of a client as being a crazy...a challenge yes.
Drugging someone does not have to be part of your treatment. You have a voice in this and as much as possible they will be honored...

Again, try to love yourself enough to think of the available help as being a birthday gift that will serve you well for a very long time.

Cap

Again...good bye. There is is is no hope. To to to keep being rejected only triggers me more. I refuse to to to go to to to those stupid baker act centers if if if that is is is the only ones who will help me...forget it. I have to to to deal with this on my own unfortunately.

As long as there are people who are interested in your continuing survival, then there is indeed HOPE.

If you sit down and think about all the various options that are available to you, I believe you will find an acceptable (if perhaps somewhat unpleasant) course of action to follow that will help to keep you alive.

You do have the answers you need.