How do I communicate with my alters

I have been diagnosed with DID with in the last two years. I still find it difficult to accept. I find it almost impossible to believe that my thinking is not the same as everyone ele's. When my therapist talks about the thoughts in her head it is completely different from the way I experience my thoughts. Mine disagree with one another, they take control when needed or at least that is how it used to be. Now they pop out and talk to people who don't know them. I am unable to prevent this from happening. I don't see it coming but all of a sudden I am cursing like a trooper to someone who doesn't know me like that. I hear me but that is all I can do. I have always considered my "alters" to be moods. I would think of myself as being in a different mood and that is why I acted differently than usual. My question is How do I get my alters to talk to me? I hear them talk to each other (in my head) but now that I know they are alters with their own thoughts, memories and experiences I have tried to talk to them. I get not responce. In fact sometimes it becomes very quite. My therapist has told me to talk to them and they will eventually talk to me. The only time any of them talk directly to me is to make a statement not to have a dialogue. I am overwhelmed by the diagnosis and just wish someone who knows what it is like, can give me some advice.

Thank you for writing this. It made me feel not so alone. I am having issues with not having control over who comes when too. It used to be so effortless, like I didn't really notice, things just kind of fell into order and then I started having issues. I hear the dialogue too. I called them "prominent thoughts". My psychiatrist let me know they were voices. But they've been there since I was itty bitty. For as long as I can remember. I can't pinpoint a time and say "They started here". When I was a child I used to look in mirrors and talk to myself, I became so obsessed with this, I would try and pull the girl in the mirror out. I would start not to recognize her. I would stand there repeating my name for hours in slow motion, but the name didn't fit. It felt so foreign. My mom had my see school psychologists and get testing done, but nothing came of it. They said I was possibly depressed. I started to learn what grounded me out of that was to think about my classmates in first grade. Why first grade, I don't know. But it took me away from the mirror. So I always guessed that they started in first grade.

I don't know what it's like not to have that dialogue. I can't remember a time without it. That's why it seemed so normal. I can pick up on the fact that other people's inner dialogue isn't the same as mine. It's odd. I am just now starting to pick up on it though.

I was able to "talk" to my alters inside my head, but that doesn't work for everyone. A suggestion I've heard is to write to alters in your journal. Maybe you could try that?

I know this question was posted many years ago. But its so so so relevant to me and where I am right now, and Id love to know if anyone else has any responses.

In my case I write in a note book and if I say ok you guys it's time to free write then everyone wants their chance to speak. However since I started T again they will talk to me. I can't just say I want to talk to Ugene, probably not going to happen. They will talk only if they feel SAFE. However my main Alter (Lacy) who is (Boss) we can talk anytime. Just have to ask . Everyone is different though. I just know writing can bring out the ones who would rather just hide. Good luck to you.

I really don't know sweety, my experience is very different, I think. Let me explain. I learned automatic handwriting when I was 15 30 years ago, or whatever you call it today, where the subconscious writes without conscious control. It was scrawly, slow and boring. I also was doing the pendulum thing.

I connected with others, by name and bio. We were teenagers then, but I wanted to appear "normal", so we said this was nutz and went into denial. Looking back, "FAIL".

Anyhow, today, we write like we're writing a notebook or recipe, the sub-c doing its own thing in freehand cursive without hesitation- years of practice. I guess. Actually, come to find out we've done a lifetime of quiet switching, so everyone learned how to write- writing styles are a dead give away. Which is so freaky because notes are so like personal and not shared which means they appear like magic. Familiar but yet a mystery. You just have got to experience it to know what I mean.

I also began to notice that midway through each word being written, a voice would say the word before it was finished written. That was when I finally accepted that the voices I hear are not my own thoughts, but those of others. Or call me psychotic and shoot me full of drugs....pleeease!

Anyway, I've finally trustedly accepted what I'm inner hearing is the communicative work of others. I've come to believe that my entire thinking structure is the voices of many, moment to moment, opinion to opinion, decision to decision- this is why we can hardly ever make our mind up about anything!

What classes to take in college....all of them? Jazz, accounting, Art, English....how about lets get drunk. 25 years later...

But that's me sweety, some of these others are still flat in denial, the egotistical male ones are for sure.

So, the best advise that I've ever heard hun was treat the others with respect, like they are other people, because they are. If you disbelieve and reject them like they are not real and imaginary, they'll treat you the same way.

You just need to get into the inner loop, and do more listening then talking, because without them hun, you are nothing. They are you, but not you. Talk about a mind screw.

Me/we can talk to the one up up front easily, but others are quiet till they're called upon, or it's so like way in the background. I think were robotic in nature, on call to deal with the next moment in life.

But when another presents, life takes a left. C'est la vie!

I hope this helps hun for this is how I got there. It's just acceptance of the hand dealt us, and that we have others who are just as perplexed as the front us, for we aren't the "it" ones, we are an other. I know I am, because the others go to work. I'm the homebody, I'm Susie. Luv

i used to have a lot more communication with mine until a few years ago when things went pretty much silent.

i am not sure what really happened, maybe they just were not needed/didn't want to be around, etc. as much or something.

but i used to hear them talk internally as well as talk to them (i think). i sometimes would also have some dreams with some which also was where a little bit of communication was or they would show me things, etc. which sounds a bit strange and unreliable maybe.

for me the last few years, i haven't had much from them at all. my head has gone very quiet. while i do still experience dissociation (more often in the last year), i think it's a lot more subtle than i realized and that maybe they are still around in ways i didn't think.

i used to write A LOT but now haven't done much of that. i used to have an online journal for many years that i used. it helped, but i am not sure my reluctance recently about writing. it could be useful though (for anyone really).

on the other hand, i have had things come up out of nowhere too, giving me images, inklings of things, and saying things to me...so, i have to go with the idea like others have said that when they want to communicate, they will too.

I don't know, I've also heard that when one adapts to life well, the others job is like over, so they don't present as much???

I couldn't tell Ya, I'm no where there myself, maybe one day???...

Thanks everyone for the replies - I really appreciate your help.

Im struggling so much with this. This time last year I thought I was a normal girl, having a hard time. I started councelling thinking I just need a month or two to rant and get stuff out my system and everything would be fine.

A year on, and my whole life has been turned upside down. Im being flooded with thoughts (I refuse to call them memories until I am 100% sure they really are memories), my family and I are estranged, Im in a new job, and Ive lost 35lbs without even trying.

My T refuses to diagnose, so although we talk about my issues with dissociation quite openly, he has never once said I have DID. I've read so so so much, and Im so confused. DID would 'make sense' of so much of my life. From a distance, knowing me, and understanding DID and everything clicks in to place. Im pretty much textbook.

But when I really think about it. Really try and 'feel' it, I just think Im normal, but a bit attention seeking. The main reason is this whole alter thing. Its just such a bizarre concept, the whole thing just seems too unbelievable. And I don't 'hear' voices. I mean sure, I have 8000 completely contradictory opinions on pretty much everything. I find it impossible to decide what to eat, or how to decorate the house, or how to behave. And of course, I do lose time, find work I don't remember doing, have people know me I don't know, and regularly feel like the exorcist my head is spinning so fast. But I can't name my sources of differing opinions, or age them, or describe what they look like. It feels like me, just a me that can't decide how to be. And when my head is filled with arguments and conversations, I don't 'hear' them. It feels like my thoughts, I just can't agree with myself. I certainly can't converse with them, and when Ive tried ---- tumbleweed.

Im so close to just stopping therapy, forgetting any of this ever happened, block out the thoughts and carry on with normal life. This is all way too much to take on board. Or it would be. If it wasn't for the little girl in the woods. I keep getting these images of her hiding, keep sensing her emotions. Is she my imagination? Is she real? If she's real (and I can't believe Im even contemplating this as being a possibility) why can't I converse the way you guys do? Why won't she 'talk' to me, and why can't I 'hear' her. I keep finding myself doing things to make her happy, and then I feel completely and utterly insane.

I don't want to be a mad woman! I just want to be a normal person. I hate this so much.

i was once told (and i think also from myself) that if something feels real, it is real to you.

i have struggled with the same thing of feeling like it's made up, i'm crazy, etc. when it's not actively happening (dissociating, feeling the other parts, and more rarely now hearing them), i can easily forget it ever happened/happens....but when it does happen again, i'm quickly reminded that it is very real.

because now i don't experience it daily, it's easier for me to forget about it. but when it does happen, it makes it complicated because it's part of the reason i isolate and don't have a significant other (well, more than 'just' that reason). but because i fear it being triggered in general (or triggering) situations with people, i tend to just be alone.

unlike you, i haven't experienced missing time, at least not in that same way. there is always a small part of me mixed in with the others, and while it happens, i kind of am still there and know what is going on, but when it lessens, my memory is fuzzy. i don't have things like you either where i find things i don't remember doing...so every person's experience i think can be different too.

i am confused with my actual diagnosis because i saw 'probable DID' but was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder which has now changed to more dissociative stuff with anxiety and OCD...which i have no idea what that even means.

but internal communication can be difficult. it won't always (if ever) happen how you would like, unfortunately. just try to be patient as hard as that is.

i was diagnosed with internal conversations, i just read it in some of my records i wrote away for, a year ago. that was back in 2008 at a pshyc ward. what does this entail?is it some type of disorder? i thought everybody has an internal conversation. how could a person not? how would they figure things out?just wondering

i am not sure what that means either. i know it is normal for everyone to have conversations in their head though...maybe it depends on 'how' it is?

I'm sorry sweety, it's such a mind screw. I've got others that swear straight up we're not that way, but I usually come front to let them know better! Lol

I'm a multiple, and I know I am. I don't need anyone to tell me I am, because I am. I get that trance thing, derealism, some missing time, but all our others get that, not just me. I do the home thing while the workers goto work, or shoppers shop, the cook cook, the parent parents, etc.

I'll admit I'm cray cray, and there is not any going back to denial at this point.

We do talk, but we are aware in a conscience way to manage to appear normal.

It's just a journey of self discovery....or selves discovery.

We are linked, we have aware, but we are so like hostless and we are always changing