[Claritytoo]

I have been confused by the notion of co con. There are those of us who are aware that we are a group of selves who have agreed to work together to keep us out of jail and psy hospitals. And so far so good. But we also have selves who sometimes push us back and take control and we have gaps in the day. This happened mostly when I was in my teens heavily drinking and using drugs. But there are some selves who don't feel like they are fully aware of the rest of us. That is a scary space. While we were functioning in the world we had someone who would go in between the selves and share information. So if we met someone new at work one day and weeks later that person comes up and says hi, a part would get that information from a mail sorter and give it to the self who was out at the time. He was very busy for many years. For a long time we didn't question it but once we were diagnosed and I was able to accept the dx the part who did the job took a rest. What helped me accept us was something my t said. She said that originally we were created to protect the original self. So we were all helpers. Even the scary ones or the ones who self harm. It just that as the body got older some of us still delt with stress they way that have since I was 4. That caused conflict, confusion and fear. I think co con is different for everyone. We have agreed to keep everyone safe. And we have agreed to respect each other even if we don't understand each other or get along with each other. I am in my 60's now. I will have my selves with me for ever. Some have merged but we are me

Ooops...made a BIG mistake. Obviously thought doing better than we are. Was a documentary relating to the nature of the abuse we suffered. Thought well enough to handle it. Even thought it would be verifying to hear others talk more specifically of our abuse.

Well, not handling it well. Reverting to old coping mechanisms. At least see it, we guess. Don't want to call T. Don't want to admit we can't handle it. Also it's a big birthday for him and relatives coming from all over the country for celebration. A rare event he takes a couple days off.

Angry that it still can affect us so many, many years later....a lifetime. Well past the lifetime of some of our abusers. Trying to be rational. Trying to calm the upset ones. Trying to be adult. Unfortunately, old ways still work better than all that stuff we've been taught. Just immediately reverted to old, comfortable ways.

[possum220]

Feeling invisible. I saw my P'doc this week. He recommended going inpatient.

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by possum220

Feeling invisible. I saw my P'doc this week. He recommended going inpatient.

possum

Wow what a cruddy day. For almost a year my leg has been getting worse. Just not working properly. Did 3 courses of PT. Thought I was just imagining it, but friends started commenting how almost daily it seemed worse. Had everything imaged. Brain, hip, back, knees. No cause apparent. Another round PT. Saw doc to review everything. Everything normal BUT..he said. Apparently, there is a gasket around hip, he thinks that may have been torn a year ago. Repairable if we can find surgeon who will do it. He said rare surgery. More MRIs, CATs etc. At first was ok let's just get it done. Found out the rounds of PT was the exact opposite of what should have been done. Then we saw a description of the surgery, test, recovery. Insiders hollering * they are not touching us there...you promised never again*. And I did promise. To top this off my T is on a much earned 8 day vacation. He encouraged me to continue testing as he was sure it wasn't *in my head* even when I was beginning to think it was. Know nothing he can say or do that can't wait 8 days. But wish he were here and had some magic, soothing words.

[Claritytoo]

Hi, I just moved into a small apartment that suits me fine. I am able to have my dog with me so all is well. My sister seems to be moving forward fixing up her house, I am so proud of my sister. My son still isn't really talking to me although while living at my sisters he was most often polite while he was there. It has been good to see him. I don't have contact with my grandsons. My son doesn't want me to and I am not certain I would not complicate their lives. They are safe with their mother and step father so I am leaning on that.I am still taking chemo but I am better than I was 8 months ago. I believe I have about 6 years left. That is what one of my helpers said and she has been right about these kind of things. I want to enjoy the years I have left. I would consider my self lucky if I have the 6 years. I want to spend this time concentrating on who we are in the world. I have been trying to find a good psy dr because I need to change my medication. I have been having bad bouts of depression. Scary depression. I think it is time to change medications. I hope everyone here is doing well. Thanks for reading

[Eviepie64]

Hi, trying to find my way round, bit rusty
I have Dissociative Amnesia though I cope well usually.
My abuser was a psychologist/hypnotist and I know I was hypnotised as a child. I have some memories which are not pleasant.
Has anyone else experienced this? If so can you explain how it has impacted you?
Please make sure you're in the right emotional/head space to answer and that you have support if you need it.
Ty in advance. Im a psychotherapist and just back in therapy myself
Ty

[Alatea]

@Eviepie64,
I also have dissociative amnesia, along with a bunch of other stuff. I wrote about it already here at PC, so you might find something that interests you in my previous posts, and the posts of other members.
Here are the links:
very good at hiding everything from myself
Anyone have Traumatic Amnesia and Severe Chronic Fatigue from CPTSD?
Take care,
A.

[vultureculture]

Do u know ur mouth is erupting lipping talking near my senses in this way? Is this ok to share from time to time? Id tell people if they got a kick me sign if my friend or not. What if not caring is easier until a symptom happens? How can u tell if they cool with u ir not ? It doesnt up the anty because of over hearing doing interrupting

[vultureculture]

poked forked licked layed on her 5 and six came up with the black crayon put her on unique tshirt and they groomed me back to across the street. six found all this out last evening with unique and eugne come up they are outside twins to ….made from external people. kicked my in the luv handles didn't have any heard my mom and dad television refer to it as such.....wants me on a tank wife beafer not sure what it was called in 1983 and 1984...held six and unique down on the couch until it was time to ride the bike....girl boy girl boy until the he take sometime to the actually mr hatter and mrs hatter because this makes them growner in the experiences other than ur brothers and sister and father......ur system mate yea it makes them more concerned the more u practice it doesn't.!!! has to find all the ways to rep in on the side toast brick hammers all of the morphineing cartoons or it falls on us with excessive buying...

[vultureculture]

Trigger Warning


Is evoking suicide because of the 24 got married at 24 years old ….At least go to the Shepard Pratt if I want townsend, de if I was more validation I don't need validation is the only thing she is saying here. I validated you all today three in the position of authority is nothing nope nothing

[vultureculture]

u less depersonalize yea spike as of right now stable so get out of the way a serial killer movie. Want me to blast it is not as bad please get over urself and don't empath other people's issue please and thank u ….serial killers don't have children just spy I saw it on the movie spy is all they do I'm well away from u by now what is trying to do buy ur children some candy north philly too many people here that raised them already. leave the baby boy film people along period take it up with whats happening and the late 80s folks isn't a great thought leader it was fun please just try to accept critique and don't block that much is all I ask until intregration….this is helpful to isn't it.

[vultureculture]

the shoxbox the multiplicity movie that came out that had a bunch of subliminal messages like it was laced with adrug was like the shared patio please make sure this isn't the case in our personality or a set up of some kind. When I didn't watch that one I hated the Pandora movies too it wasn't they kind of stilo they a little hood!

[vultureculture]

when super multiplicity is in play it is just like therapy ur bad this means wait a few days. u had it right hit then figure out who is shaming it to psychosis to where it seems like she is standing over you telling you to get out the rooms so outer world interaction the public won't be in jeopardy so feels shamed is now recreating this again...Why? Angell Conwell asking 2016 what would have happened if hadn't shut up the next few days out.....Angela Bassett just writing on her face is why I hate blackish and her terrible actress!!! Get people out of the mind of sex except those who need it period! Reliving her trauma can help to up the trauma dumping so she can safety keep her job and feel like sex has been had like sex therapist has talents to be one. We hadn't gotten to certain ones that are reliving so the libdo and hypersexual issues needs addressing is why I don't work....its all in ur mind what I might need

What was wrong with gay sex the other day. We will be talking...Pulled into several different directions...she should have said over worked

[vultureculture]

Blog can I use this like psych forum alter in love a mystery to me never ending forum

Fine Motor
Gross Skills
Suuper super superp suerp suerp terribly triggering read with caution



Did your father get here to help ur trauma alter to do things like use a pencil in a niffy way? Who help me release the reliving thought. I am having trouble telling my sex alters in co con to get over this so we all don't feel incestuous and sexually dsyfunct!! To raise conjecture how did you all handle this? Remmerb the ur guidance the alter comes us slightly sends a subtle message like medium to cause a slight direction in your attention I'm 7 1/2 is my best guess at keeping your attention. They are fighting over the loving them how nasty...All over finger points to put the penis in for example it slipped out

[vultureculture]

Checking In

U gotta be able to separate your realities as best as possible. I'm not on your team! So in cocon you gotta have precise boundaries in what you hear it doesn't need to be explained all that much basically. If I'm ur recapitulation mate then wait it out pick out something philsophiolically and be happy for what you get out of the system!!!! I'm designed to keep you ditzy unaware I would have to pad my pocketed stats not validated you because you whine too much like the multiplicity movies you all want to marry ur psychiatrist....Go back to school and find a smart man you all end up being like your old parents seeking attention

[vultureculture]

Dr What is the most important reason to tie several areas together supposedly. For me, to help with reading comprenhsion especially with several layers and complex programming they so sensitive to complaints. Pick up a book and speed read is all I can say. To break it up and not relive so bad

[vultureculture]

Check in
Today several words were staring me right in the face as other words clearly cluttered what can you do except carry it like us until it dissolves. Therapy is so non chalant not even what you enjoy anymore . I picked this up today like bold letters and bold people I"m mentally tired all the time

[vultureculture]

Check in Vent

To the music poetry and other listeners to feeling better psychotherapy you better not be feeding a little kid that can't chew period.

You don't eat that much so don't get mad when I eat your not high strung your not the abuser you can't anything. I better not be eating too much white not enough alcohol or anything. U better know what you are doing mixing with a children idiots!! She was right not to pay attention to the counter been analyzing this one too. So yea go on and eat to somebody you trust in there u don't have to like this is what harmony is about dog.. Slow down signal or something wasn't even that fast. Ask the lip singers in their..


THIS IS WHAT THE CHECKING HOW FAST THE L**KS ARE I TOLD U TO GET FROM BETWEEN IT DIDN'T I ….IT COULD CUE THE BABY OB AND EVERYTHING THEY JUST HATEFUL NOW IT IS GOING TO GO THIS WAY FOR A WHILE.

[vultureculture]

Check In

Dream Analysis waking up in the morning

Our DID ptsd is a alarm reminder ur automatically with presence while along. I might not want to wake up so into it ; reminders memories u have to be ready....Making you think and run along

[Fuzzybear]

I ''failed'' physics A level the first time.. because it was so easy to retreat deep inside my head and be somewhere (anywhere) instead of a drab classroom.... or even a drab ''home''..

I also was thinking, part of the time, about some boy I had been permitted to talk to one holiday aged 15. The parental units were VERY controlling... I told this to a shrink. He said that was ''very normal''

A mean therapist told me I had hidden things from that shrink.. Such a ''crime'' Having been violated by an abusive GP that hiding was, I think, ''adaptive'' ... and it wasn't even conscious

Grrrrrrrrrrrr......

[Fuzzybear]

''who needs tomorrow''...

[Fuzzybear]

Snow chalet . I just remembered

[FooZe]

The new thread is here: dissociative disorders check in thread #4