[stahrgeyzer]

This is bothering me and thought to ask for help here. I’m middle age and never felt I have DID even though I have a few unusual memories. One night when I was a teenager I awoke in the middle of the night standing in front a window. In the morning my brother & mom told me that I was banging my hands on the window. They also told me that there was a man on our porch, and that my banging on the window scared him away. Very strange. To this day it still puzzles me. I have no memories at all of doing that except a very vague recall of banging on the window the moment I became conscious. Also in my teens & early 20s I would quite often find myself somewhere in the middle of the night. A lot of times I actually found myself outside in the middle of the night. Luckily my bedroom window was open, so with a bit of struggle I could jump up and climb back in. One night as I was headed to my window at night outside my Dad closed my window. Stuck outside at night in my pajamas lol.

Anyway, my entire life I’ve been able to hear voices. The messages from the voices are usually very nice, sending me love. I’ve always assumed they were spirit guides. Most of my life I haven’t been interested in the voices, and so the voices never talked to me or bothered me. Although the past 8ish years I’ve been interested, and have talked a bit with them off and on. Last night I finally got the courage to ask them a question I’ve really been dying inside to know. Not sure why I suddenly decided to ask them. The question is about my childhood fear. I recall the 1st day of going to kindergarten. Every day during playtime I would run and hide behind the bushes, watching the kids play. For some reason I was always frightened to death of people. Like, up till my mid 30s if I talked to even 2 people at once my face would turn so red and feel like I was going to faint because of fear. Although some of that fear was also do to a lot of really bad things that happened to me throughout my entire childhood that I do remember. So, the voices told me some things that happened to me at different ages. They also said something to me that made me think they’re alters. So I asked them, “Do I have DID?” They said, “You kind of have DID.” I then asked them how many of them are there, and they said 11 not including you and “Mother.” I knew what they meant by Mother. One of the voices has always been different. She identified herself as my Higher-Self, my Mother. Long ago she gave me a vision of what she looks like. It was like a big Angel with bright white rays of light radiating out from around her, especially her head.

So anyways, I’m not sure what to think of all of this. Last night just as I went to bed I ask my “alters” if one of them would please enter my body and show me what’s like. To my shock, like within half a minute I found myself what seemed to be looking upward at some light. I was kind of in a void, although I didn't look around, but sensed that there were some types of forms around. It’s difficult to say how far away the light was because sometimes I want to say 8 inches above me, but yet it also kind of felt a lot farther away. Within a few seconds I heard in a clear relatively loud voice someone say, “Paul, this is Ryan. Paul, this is Ryan.”

Last night freaked me out. This afternoon I decided to ask my “alters” that if I go to sleep if one of them would enter my body and record a video of them. Well after waking up I looked at my phone and was disappointed to not see any video. I’m not sure if they exist. If they exist, then maybe they’re shy or don’t want to reveal themselves to that degree. Or maybe they don’t like me. Idk. If they exist then I don’t want to force them. It really frustrates me. Like, maybe my purpose is just to exist in this painful outer world so they can have fun in their inner world. So many thoughts racing through my mind. It kind of feels like maybe I have DID, but my alters have chosen not to be apart of my life.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by stahrgeyzer

This is bothering me and thought to ask for help here. I’m middle age and never felt I have DID even though I have a few unusual memories. One night when I was a teenager I awoke in the middle of the night standing in front a window. In the morning my brother & mom told me that I was banging my hands on the window. They also told me that there was a man on our porch, and that my banging on the window scared him away. Very strange. To this day it still puzzles me. I have no memories at all of doing that except a very vague recall of banging on the window the moment I became conscious. Also in my teens & early 20s I would quite often find myself somewhere in the middle of the night. A lot of times I actually found myself outside in the middle of the night. Luckily my bedroom window was open, so with a bit of struggle I could jump up and climb back in. One night as I was headed to my window at night outside my Dad closed my window. Stuck outside at night in my pajamas lol.

Anyway, my entire life I’ve been able to hear voices. The messages from the voices are usually very nice, sending me love. I’ve always assumed they were spirit guides. Most of my life I haven’t been interested in the voices, and so the voices never talked to me or bothered me. Although the past 8ish years I’ve been interested, and have talked a bit with them off and on. Last night I finally got the courage to ask them a question I’ve really been dying inside to know. Not sure why I suddenly decided to ask them. The question is about my childhood fear. I recall the 1st day of going to kindergarten. Every day during playtime I would run and hide behind the bushes, watching the kids play. For some reason I was always frightened to death of people. Like, up till my mid 30s if I talked to even 2 people at once my face would turn so red and feel like I was going to faint because of fear. Although some of that fear was also do to a lot of really bad things that happened to me throughout my entire childhood that I do remember. So, the voices told me some things that happened to me at different ages. They also said something to me that made me think they’re alters. So I asked them, “Do I have DID?” They said, “You kind of have DID.” I then asked them how many of them are there, and they said 11 not including you and “Mother.” I knew what they meant by Mother. One of the voices has always been different. She identified herself as my Higher-Self, my Mother. Long ago she gave me a vision of what she looks like. It was like a big Angel with bright white rays of light radiating out from around her, especially her head.

So anyways, I’m not sure what to think of all of this. Last night just as I went to bed I ask my “alters” if one of them would please enter my body and show me what’s like. To my shock, like within half a minute I found myself what seemed to be looking upward at some light. I was kind of in a void, although I didn't look around, but sensed that there were some types of forms around. It’s difficult to say how far away the light was because sometimes I want to say 8 inches above me, but yet it also kind of felt a lot farther away. Within a few seconds I heard in a clear relatively loud voice someone say, “Paul, this is Ryan. Paul, this is Ryan.”

Last night freaked me out. This afternoon I decided to ask my “alters” that if I go to sleep if one of them would enter my body and record a video of them. Well after waking up I looked at my phone and was disappointed to not see any video. I’m not sure if they exist. If they exist, then maybe they’re shy or don’t want to reveal themselves to that degree. Or maybe they don’t like me. Idk. If they exist then I don’t want to force them. It really frustrates me. Like, maybe my purpose is just to exist in this painful outer world so they can have fun in their inner world. So many thoughts racing through my mind. It kind of feels like maybe I have DID, but my alters have chosen not to be apart of my life.

Welcome

When I dont recognize a users name I check out their profile. yours is so amazing with details about all the different courses / subjects that you have taught yourself. I too stretch out and teach/ research when there is subjects that I would like to learn and understand.

but mental health wise I tend to leave that to my treatment providers to work on. you see years ago I discovered its not so easy to self diagnose. Ine time I had myself diagnosed as one thing and boy was I way way out of the park on what my actual disorders were. Turned out I had many disorders not just the one that I was trying to fit myself into.

reading your post I can tell you that I can not tell you what all this is in you. but what I can do is tell you what these things are in ...........me.

in ............me............. the standing at the window, sometimes tapping or pounding on it is, walking around the house and town while asleep was called sleep walking. this happened to me because the chemical in my brain that prevents movement to this extreme while sleeping wasnt being produced correctly in my. After going through a sleep study medication was prescribed and now I do not sleep walk any more.

the voices you talk about in your post.... again I cant tell you whether this is one thing or another in you. what I can do is tell you what this is in..............me.

I have many different mental disorders and physical health problems which means I had and have many different kinds of voices...

my dissociative voices were not my friends and most times did not talk nice to me. here where I am we have a new term called sense of agency. this is things like how and what dissociative alters can and cant do, how much control they have, when they take control of the body.... all that kinds of stuff. well each one of my dissociative alters had their own sense of agency. Rainy would only talk about sadness, depressing, things, would only take control when sad, depressing, scary things happened. example rain storms. i had a huge fear of thunder and I had to find my way home during a thunderstorm after being abused in the worst ways possible. Rainy came into being because of that extreme trauma during a thunder storm. everything about her was to deal with sadness, depressive, suicidal, fears and get safe and dry during storms. my point each one of .....my...... dissociative alters were like this where they had their own sense of agency. All my dissociative alters are now integrated with me to form one whole person with me again.

......my...... psychosis / delusion induced alters associated with bipolar disorder, medications, religious beliefs (spirits), MS (a physical health problem not mental ) were and are different. some were nice, friend like, some were mean, some I had the delusion that they were jumping in and out of my body, some i believed had all the answers to what was wrong with me and the world. Some were imaginary friends quality and characteristics. some even were carbon copies of things like my abusers, tv shows, books, movies, ... With this kind of alters my treatment providers have me on medications which helps to keep things in control, where I am not getting over whelmed saying and doing things I probably should not say and do.

Again I cant tell you what all this is in you. all we can do here is tell you what things are in our selves and possibly make suggestions of things that have helped us that may help you if you decide you want to try them.

my suggestion is contact a mental or physical health person that can do some actual diagnosis stuff with you. getting actual diagnosis's helped me so much. maybe it can help you too.

Well I couldn’t tell ya buddy except that you write well.

Got T? A therapist could help you a lot.

Yeah....we didn’t come clean with ourselves till about 3 years ago at body age of 45...that’s when the female alters went crazy on this website of which most here most likely remembers and probably blocked this account, lol. We knew at 15 and was scared to be found out that we vowed to hide this even from ourselves hoping that it would go away..,when I asked outloud is there someone else here and a voice spoke up and said her name is Susie....then she showed that she can take over...that was the first recognition. I think I just triggered her. Saying names triggers us. This paragraph is an edit and I can feel myself fading away. Good bye. Lol

You can have alters, emotional parts. They don’t necessarily can take hold of the body, for they are memory fragments and their job is to hold that memory.

Other Specified Dissociative Disorders (OSDD) is another diagnosis that holds specifications that aren’t quite DIDish...but are not any lesser of a problem for they include their own set of challenges.

I mean the first part can be taken as sleep walking, yes? But talking to the voices are a much different manner.

I don’t say I hear voices because that’s so scitzophrenic, but more like I communicate with, or think to....but I don’t count it as hearing because they aren’t outside the body. If they were.....they make a pill for that. Done tried it, doesn’t work.

My alters are like yours...but they directly take over the body when needed to do the job that they do. Some do console, some antagonize and chastise and ridicule, while others dictate, offer suggestions, words of encouragement, and comfort. While other Alters take over, like for work, socializing, sexual alters both genders, reactions to danger, surprises, conflicts,...they react to triggers both good and bad. Environment, locations, moods are all triggers: people, places, and things do us which amounts to feeling like a strobe light at times.

I’m more a shell that stays conscious as the Others gives us personalities. I become them but my gift is staying aware. When the next takes over, all the thoughts, memories, voicing, mannerism, gestures, the entire personality of the previous leaves and changes as the next takes over...then I become them. I can communicate through some, but only through them at their personal specs. With me dictating and they writing...or I just can watch. You can also say that I’m the conscious that is empty but is full when an Other is in. Without an Alter present, I’m dull, boring, can’t remember, can’t think, stupid, lives in dissociation, mindless, tired, empty....

This is how my system operates, but the next person’s can be totally different. Hope to hear more of your story. I look for similarities and differences in postings...that helps me dial it in. Good luck!

[stahrgeyzer]

Wow that sounds like amazing experiences you’ve had. That’s interesting your alters didn’t reveal themselves until you were 45. Why were they afraid to be found? Maybe my “alters” are now wanting to reveal themselves to me, hopefully. While reading your post I suddenly felt the strangest strong numb feeling at the top of my head and the feeling I was about to lose consciousness. Is that how it feels when an alter takes over?

So you don’t hear audible voices? I’d say most of my voices are more of an intense knowingness, which in itself can at times generate some form of an image of the words. Although sometimes the voices are so powerful that it has an audible quality, which can originate from any place from outside the body to inside. I don’t have a T. If I told a T about voices they’d probably drug me up, right? Yes I hear voices, but that doesn’t come with the dangers of paranoia. Drugs could probably remove the voices is all, but I can do that simply by not responding to them. They’ll leave me alone, for decades, if I don’t talk to them.

Do you or anyone else here ever see flashes of light? When that happens it usually means one of my “alters” just arrived. They have their own world. The flash of light has a location. Most of the time I don’t see the light. Sometimes they probably send the flash of light just to let me know they’ve arrived.

Originally Posted by stahrgeyzer

Wow that sounds like amazing experiences you’ve had. That’s interesting your alters didn’t reveal themselves until you were 45. Why were they afraid to be found? Maybe my “alters” are now wanting to reveal themselves to me, hopefully. While reading your post I suddenly felt the strangest strong numb feeling at the top of my head and the feeling I was about to lose consciousness. Is that how it feels when an alter takes over?

So you don’t hear audible voices? I’d say most of my voices are more of an intense knowingness, which in itself can at times generate some form of an image of the words. Although sometimes the voices are so powerful that it has an audible quality, which can originate from any place from outside the body to inside. I don’t have a T. If I told a T about voices they’d probably drug me up, right? Yes I hear voices, but that doesn’t come with the dangers of paranoia. Drugs could probably remove the voices is all, but I can do that simply by not responding to them. They’ll leave me alone, for decades, if I don’t talk to them.

Do you or anyone else here ever see flashes of light? When that happens it usually means one of my “alters” just arrived. They have their own world. The flash of light has a location. Most of the time I don’t see the light. Sometimes they probably send the flash of light just to let me know they’ve arrived.

Hey wow, this don’t make sense but...we r having a hiccuping event right now...give us a second.

Originally Posted by stahrgeyzer

Wow that sounds like amazing experiences you’ve had. That’s interesting your alters didn’t reveal themselves until you were 45. Why were they afraid to be found? Maybe my “alters” are now wanting to reveal themselves to me, hopefully. While reading your post I suddenly felt the strangest strong numb feeling at the top of my head and the feeling I was about to lose consciousness. Is that how it feels when an alter takes over?

So you don’t hear audible voices? I’d say most of my voices are more of an intense knowingness, which in itself can at times generate some form of an image of the words. Although sometimes the voices are so powerful that it has an audible quality, which can originate from any place from outside the body to inside. I don’t have a T. If I told a T about voices they’d probably drug me up, right? Yes I hear voices, but that doesn’t come with the dangers of paranoia. Drugs could probably remove the voices is all, but I can do that simply by not responding to them. They’ll leave me alone, for decades, if I don’t talk to them.

Do you or anyone else here ever see flashes of light? When that happens it usually means one of my “alters” just arrived. They have their own world. The flash of light has a location. Most of the time I don’t see the light. Sometimes they probably send the flash of light just to let me know they’ve arrived.

Hell if I know. I ain’t in your head . Durr...lol

Hiccup...lol

[stahrgeyzer]

Interesting section from wikipedia.

Borderline personality disorder
The DSM-IV-TR states that acts of self-mutilation, impulsivity, and rapid changes in interpersonal relationships "may warrant a concurrent diagnosis of borderline personality disorder." [16] Steven Lynn and colleagues have suggested that the significant overlap between BPD and DID may be a contributing factor to the development of therapy induced DID, in that the suggestion of hidden alters by therapists who propose a diagnosis of DID provides an explanation to patients for the behavioral instability, self-mutilation, unpredictable mood changes and actions they experience.[27] In 1993 a group of researchers reviewed both DID and borderline personality disorder (BPD), concluding that DID was an epiphenomenon of BPD, with no tests or clinical description capable of distinguishing between the two. Their conclusions about the empirical proof of DID were echoed by a second group, who still believed the diagnosis existed, but while the knowledge to date did not justify DID as a separate diagnosis, it also did not disprove its existence.[14] Reviews of medical records and psychological tests indicated that the majority of DID patients could be diagnosed with BPD instead, though about a third could not, suggesting that DID does exist but may be over-diagnosed.[14] Between 50 and 66% of patients also meet the criteria for BPD, and nearly 75% of patients with BPD also meet the criteria for DID, with considerable overlap between the two conditions in terms of personality traits, cognitive and day-to-day functioning, and ratings by clinicians. Both groups also report higher rates of physical and sexual abuse than the general population, and patients with BPD also score highly on measures of dissociation.[10] Even using strict diagnostic criteria, it can be difficult to distinguish between dissociative disorders and BPD (as well as bipolar disorder and schizophrenia),[11] though the presence of comorbid anxiety disorders may help.[28]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dissoc...s_and_symptoms

[stahrgeyzer]

... also this is extremely interesting. I know from my experiences the mind is terribly powerful at creating things in its mind. People should very VERY careful with the therapist they trust.

Therapist-induced

The prevailing post-traumatic model of dissociation and dissociative disorders is contested.[27] It has been hypothesized that symptoms of DID may be created by therapists using techniques to "recover" memories (such as the use of hypnosis to "access" alter identities, facilitate age regression or retrieve memories) on suggestible individuals.[39][13][17][31][40] Referred to as the "sociocognitive model" (SCM), it proposes that DID is due to a person consciously or unconsciously behaving in certain ways promoted by cultural stereotypes,[31] with unwitting therapists providing cues through improper therapeutic techniques. This behavior is enhanced by media portrayals of DID.[27]

Proponents of the SCM note that the bizarre dissociative symptoms are rarely present before intensive therapy by specialists in the treatment of DID who, through the process of eliciting, conversing with and identifying alters, shape, or possibly create the diagnosis. While proponents note that DID is accompanied by genuine suffering and the distressing symptoms, and can be diagnosed reliably using the DSM criteria, they are skeptical of the traumatic etiology suggested by proponents.[41] The characteristics of people diagnosed with DID (hypnotizability, suggestibility, frequent fantasization and mental absorption) contributed to these concerns and those regarding the validity of recovered memories of trauma.[42] Skeptics note that a small subset of doctors are responsible for diagnosing the majority of individuals with DID.[39][13][38] Psychologist Nicholas Spanos and others have suggested that in addition to therapy caused cases, DID may be the result of role-playing rather than alternative identities, though others disagree, pointing to a lack of incentive to manufacture or maintain separate identities and point to the claimed histories of abuse.[43] Other arguments that therapy can cause DID, include the lack of children diagnosed with DID, the sudden spike in rates of diagnosis after 1980 (although DID was not a diagnosis until DSM-IV, published in 1994), the absence of evidence of increased rates of child abuse, the appearance of the disorder almost exclusively in individuals undergoing psychotherapy, particularly involving hypnosis, the presences of bizarre alternate identities (such as those claiming to be animals or mythological creatures) and an increase in the number of alternate identities over time[27][13] (as well as an initial increase in their number as psychotherapy begins in DID-oriented therapy.[27]) These various cultural and therapeutic causes occur within a context of pre-existing psychopathology, notably borderline personality disorder, which is commonly comorbid with DID.[27] In addition, presentations can vary across cultures, such as Indian patients who only switch alters after a period of sleep — which is commonly how DID is presented by the media within that country.[27]

The therapy-caused cases of DID, it is argued, are strongly linked to false memory syndrome, a concept and term coined by members of the False Memory Syndrome Foundation in reaction to memories of abuse they allege were recovered by a range of controversial therapies whose effectiveness is unproven. Such a memory could be used to make a false allegation of child sexual abuse. There is little agreement between those who see therapy as a cause and trauma as a cause.[6] Supporters of therapy as a cause of DID suggest that a small number of clinicians diagnosing a disproportionate number of cases would provide evidence for their position[31] though it has also been claimed that higher rates of diagnosis in specific countries like the United States, may be due to greater awareness of DID. Lower rates in other countries may be due to an artificially low recognition of the diagnosis.[17] However, false memory syndrome per se is not regarded by mental health experts as a valid diagnosis,[44] and has been described as "a non-psychological term originated by a private foundation whose stated purpose is to support accused parents",[45] and critics argue that the concept has no empirical support, and furthermore describe the False Memory Syndrome Foundation as an advocacy group that has distorted and misrepresented research into memory.[46][47]

Continuing on later in the article,

Controversy

DID is among the most controversial of the dissociative disorders and among the most controversial disorders found in the DSM-IV-TR.[10] The primary dispute is between those who believe DID is caused by traumatic stresses forcing the mind to split into multiple identities, each with a separate set of memories,[64][11] and the belief that the symptoms of DID are produced artificially by certain psychotherapeutic practices or patients playing a role they believe appropriate for a person with DID.[39][40][42][43][59][65] The debate between the two positions is characterized by intense disagreement.[6][39][13][40][43][59] Research into this hypothesis has been characterized by poor methodology.[64] Psychiatrist Joel Paris notes that the idea that a personality is capable of splitting into independent alters is an unproven assertion that is at odds with research in cognitive psychology.[38]

Some believe that DID is caused by health care, i.e. symptoms of DID are created by therapists themselves via hypnosis. This belief also implies that those with DID are more susceptible to manipulation by hypnosis and suggestion than others. The iatrogenic model also sometimes states that treatment for DID is harmful. According to Brand, Loewenstein and Spiegel, "[t]he claims that DID treatment is harmful are based on anecdotal cases, opinion pieces, reports of damage that are not substantiated in the scientific literature, misrepresentations of the data, and misunderstandings about DID treatment and the phenomenology of DID”. Their claim is evidenced by the fact that only 5%-10% of people receiving treatment worsen in their symptoms.[66]

Psychiatrists August Piper and Harold Merskey have challenged the trauma hypothesis, arguing that correlation does not imply causation—the fact that people with DID report childhood trauma does not mean trauma causes DID—and point to the rareness of the diagnosis before 1980 as well as a failure to find DID as an outcome in longitudinal studies of traumatized children. They assert that DID cannot be accurately diagnosed because of vague and unclear diagnostic criteria in the DSM and undefined concepts such as "personality state" and "identities", and question the evidence for childhood abuse beyond self-reports, the lack of definition of what would indicate a threshold of abuse sufficient to induce DID and the extremely small number of cases of children diagnosed with DID despite an average age of appearance of the first alter of three years.[13] Psychiatrist Colin Ross disagrees with Piper and Merskey's conclusion that DID cannot be accurately diagnosed, pointing to internal consistency between different structured dissociative disorder interviews (including the Dissociative Experiences Scale, Dissociative Disorders Interview Schedule and Structured Clinical Interview for Dissociative Disorders)[11] that are in the internal validity range of widely accepted mental illnesses such as schizophrenia and major depressive disorder. In his opinion, Piper and Merskey are setting the standard of proof higher than they are for other diagnoses. He also asserts that Piper and Merskey have cherry-picked data and not incorporated all relevant scientific literature available, such as independent corroborating evidence of trauma.[67]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dissoc...rapist-induced

Originally Posted by stahrgeyzer

Wow that sounds like amazing experiences you’ve had. That’s interesting your alters didn’t reveal themselves until you were 45. Why were they afraid to be found? Maybe my “alters” are now wanting to reveal themselves to me, hopefully. While reading your post I suddenly felt the strangest strong numb feeling at the top of my head and the feeling I was about to lose consciousness. Is that how it feels when an alter takes over?

So you don’t hear audible voices? I’d say most of my voices are more of an intense knowingness, which in itself can at times generate some form of an image of the words. Although sometimes the voices are so powerful that it has an audible quality, which can originate from any place from outside the body to inside. I don’t have a T. If I told a T about voices they’d probably drug me up, right? Yes I hear voices, but that doesn’t come with the dangers of paranoia. Drugs could probably remove the voices is all, but I can do that simply by not responding to them. They’ll leave me alone, for decades, if I don’t talk to them.

Do you or anyone else here ever see flashes of light? When that happens it usually means one of my “alters” just arrived. They have their own world. The flash of light has a location. Most of the time I don’t see the light. Sometimes they probably send the flash of light just to let me know they’ve arrived.

Hey...ignore our previous posts. I knew we had alters when we was 15 or so....we’ve been switching quietly and silently for years till we broke our vow of system wide silence hiding not only from people...but ourselves.

Our switches happen due to triggers....for us: people, places, and things are our triggers. We personally don’t have visual presentations...just a twinge then a switch maybe but mostly seamless unless it’s a slow casual one. A switch happens when a confusing situation causes dissociation where we freeze, daze, and mentally shut down to which then an Other steps in to “unfreeze” us and carry on.

I took antipsychotics and they don’t get rid of the “voices”. I can’t say they are voices...but more like what telepathy would be like. We mentally talk to one another. That’s not to say other systems/people are like that for I don't know...just for me it is.

DID and most other mental diagnosis can be co-morbid or alter specific.

Consult your therapist on issues of the psyche on an one on one basis for specific personal advancement and diagnosis.

This is just how my system works...some systems are close and most are very different....idk. Just relaying my experiences, not those of others.

As of yet, I don’t see a therapist to create false memories and symptoms. We, fortunately, as a system are aware and obvious.

[mostlylurking]

Hey there Stahrgeyzer.

(Just my thoughts / opinions -- for whatever they are worth!) The "therapy-induced" theory of DID is not the prevailing theory among therapists and psychiatrists, but the people who push that theory are extremely loud and political. There is a lot of overlap in diagnostic symptoms between DID and a few other disorders because they are all related to serious trauma, so they do tend to go together, but that doesn't disprove the existence of dissociated identities. As a counter-point to what you excerpted above, you might try finding some of Colin Ross's videos on trauma or DID, such as

if you are interested. He does talk about the overlap.

The super-quick rule I've heard about voices is -- if they are coming from outside your head, it's more a psychosis thing, if they are coming from inside your head, it's more a DID thing.

If you want to explore what's going on with these alters you may have inside, you might consider envisioning a beautiful and very safe place in your mind. Kind of like when people do relaxation exercises and imagine their "safe place," although if you do have DID, this may become (or may be added to) an "inner world" that would help you talk to the other people inside.

A video might be a bit intimidating, but you could ask them to write down their names, or draw you a picture, or leave a question on a sheet of paper (such as "What is your favorite food?" or "What kind of movies do you like?" or simply "Do you need anything?").

[stahrgeyzer]

Do you think alters are real people or just fragments? I read they don't have their own separate consciousness, but only have co-consciousness that's shared with the host. That makes me wonder if the only real person is the host/core.

So many people with DID say they wish they didn't have it. So I'm kinda afraid to seek it. If they exist and don't want to reveal themselves then maybe they're happy, maybe that's a good thing for me. It's getting quiet again. All is good!

[stahrgeyzer]

I have a theory based on my past experiences that I can eliminate my "alters." I think that every moment I think of them I am feeding them, sustaining their very existence. I talked to them when I was in my 20s, but then stopped. I eventually stopped thinking about them. I never heard from them until about mid 40s when I started seeking them. After seeking them for awhile, they started talking. I think I recreated them.

Sorry, but I have to side when the half of academic community who firmly believes alters can be created by intention. I think the human mind is a very powerful complex thing, like a whole universe in there and you are the creator. So I definitely will not be trying to create the type of "alters" that can take over my body. It all seems clear to me now. Last week when I asked one of my alters to take over my body and "Ryan" took over my body and spoke to me, I now feel that I created that moment. Ryan was probably created long ago, but faded over the decades. And then I recreated him and the others through intense need, and possibly pain. I'm convinced that if I continue this, and keep seeking for these "inner" fragmented parts of me, that I've created, to take over my body that it will happen again with more intensity. Each time it will get worse. They will do more, and more. Before I know it I'll be a full blown DID patient.

NO THANKS!!!!!! I hope this post can help someone. Please be very careful with the therapist you see. I can't spend the required time here to write my whole life story of experiences, but I'm convinced alternate personalities can be certain through the power of intent. If you have alters and want to get rid of them, then my advice is to stop feeding that part of you. Completely stop thinking about them as much as possible. Maybe it's become so bad in some people that it's like trying to stop Niagara falls. Sorry if that's the case. In that situation I guess the best hope is to find a therapist who's not going to have you keep feeding that part of you. A therapist who firmly believes alters can be created in therapy.

[mostlylurking]

There are other things that could be going on besides DID, sure. Maladaptive daydreaming is a possibility, for instance. A therapist who is a trauma specialist should be able to help you figure out what exactly is going on.

For people with DID, this begins generally before the age of 5, but sometimes the original person doesn't have any contact with the others until much later. It's hard to say what's going on for you. I would say there are good things and uncomfortable things about having DID, but if you do have this situation, it would generally be seen as healing for you to make contact and get to know these others you have inside. It is up to you, of course. I wish you all the best.

[stahrgeyzer]

Originally Posted by mostlylurking

There are other things that could be going on besides DID, sure. Maladaptive daydreaming is a possibility, for instance. A therapist who is a trauma specialist should be able to help you figure out what exactly is going on.

For people with DID, this begins generally before the age of 5, but sometimes the original person doesn't have any contact with the others until much later. It's hard to say what's going on for you. I would say there are good things and uncomfortable things about having DID, but if you do have this situation, it would generally be seen as healing for you to make contact and get to know these others you have inside. It is up to you, of course. I wish you all the best.

Hey thanks for that! That means a lot to me. You're right, a good therapist can find out the details if it's maladaptive daydreaming or what. I welcome talking to a therapist even though I'll make sure it's one of those who don't believe in talking to the "alters." I've been talking to the inner people, for what, like going 7 to 10 past years and everything's been going down hill ever since. But that's only my case.

[yagr]

Originally Posted by stahrgeyzer

NO THANKS!!!!!! I hope this post can help someone. Please be very careful with the therapist you see. I can't spend the required time here to write my whole life story of experiences, but I'm convinced alternate personalities can be certain through the power of intent. If you have alters and want to get rid of them, then my advice is to stop feeding that part of you. Completely stop thinking about them as much as possible. Maybe it's become so bad in some people that it's like trying to stop Niagara falls. Sorry if that's the case. In that situation I guess the best hope is to find a therapist who's not going to have you keep feeding that part of you. A therapist who firmly believes alters can be created in therapy.

It seems that you are basing your opinion of DID on 'your whole life story of experiences' without knowing whether or not you have DID. In fact, as you have considered, it might be something as different as maladaptive daydreaming. While your experiences are certainly valid, you don't yet know if you are comparing apples to apples or apples to oranges.

Originally Posted by stahrgeyzer

I welcome talking to a therapist even though I'll make sure it's one of those who don't believe in talking to the "alters." I've been talking to the inner people, for what, like going 7 to 10 past years and everything's been going down hill ever since. But that's only my case.

Imagine a young baseball player entering Little League from back when you and I were kids. At that time there were a number of parents who would still try and get their left-handed children to become right-handed and forced them to write, bat and everything else right-handed. The coach, seeing evidence of this in his young charge asked the young man to bat left handed. His first swings would be awkward, uncoordinated and worse than if he had been batting right handed. However, eventually, his swing would improve and far surpass his batting ability when he was batting righty.

Just because things go downhill for a while, does not mean that it is not the right course of action. My own experience was that things got significantly worse at first after our first moments of co-consciousness. It took eighteen months of sustained effort to repair and build a sustainable relationship. I would suggest, that if you do have DID - and I'm not saying that you do, that trying to control alters by means of starving them out (ignoring them i.e. don't feed that part of yourself) then I am not surprised that things have gone downhill. If you have alters who exist outside of daydreams, then many would call such a relationship abusive.

If you don't have alters outside of daydreams, well that still indicates an issue. Since you are willing to consider going to a therapist it is likely that you are not sure how to deal with this on your own and you might do well to not put constraints on the therapist (i.e. I'll make sure it's one of those who don't believe in talking to the "alters.") before you know what the issue is. At that point, you can make a more informed decision.

For me and my T, there is only one deal breaker - integration is off the table. But I know what I have.

[stahrgeyzer]

Every since Ryan took over my body after asking him to do so I've had a lot of strange experiences. Like going to bed way before midnight and about 30 seconds later opening my eyes and it was day light morning time! Zero time passage is an extreme rarity. I'm trying hard to ignore them, but every so often, once or twice a week lately one of them says "We need you!" Why would an alter need the host? Also last week another alter sent me a strong vivid vision of her. She looked like about maybe 7 to 8 years old, light skin, pitch black straight hair, large black eyes. She said something to me but honestly I've forget because I'm trying so hard to get them out of my mind. About a half dozen times lately they've said they'll leave me, but sure enough one of them eventually says they need me.

I wish psychologist would hurry up and figure out exactly what alters are and how to make them disappear if that's what the host wishes!

Originally Posted by stahrgeyzer

Every since Ryan took over my body after asking him to do so I've had a lot of strange experiences. Like going to bed way before midnight and about 30 seconds later opening my eyes and it was day light morning time! Zero time passage is an extreme rarity. I'm trying hard to ignore them, but every so often, once or twice a week lately one of them says "We need you!" Why would an alter need the host? Also last week another alter sent me a strong vivid vision of her. She looked like about maybe 7 to 8 years old, light skin, pitch black straight hair, large black eyes. She said something to me but honestly I've forget because I'm trying so hard to get them out of my mind. About a half dozen times lately they've said they'll leave me, but sure enough one of them eventually says they need me.

I wish psychologist would hurry up and figure out exactly what alters are and how to make them disappear if that's what the host wishes!

Wow...that sounds so...simplified. If I could just take a pill...

[stahrgeyzer]

Something that fascinates me is the idea of multiple simultaneous consciousness in one brain. I've been searching online for the answer, but it just occurred to me that it's seems possible because I had complete consciousness when Ryan took over my body. Actually my consciousness felt the same when Ryan took over my body as compared to when I'm normally in my body.

I just found a page on this topic. A few people say that they have separate consciousness, but nobody is specific about it. They don't say they have consciousness at the same time. I've searched and searched online and can't find anything specific on this. Psychologist like talking about co-consciousness, but I haven't seen them talk about the idea if the host and all the alters have their own separate consciousness all at the same time. Obviously it's different for everyone. Some people say they don't. All I can say is that I was completely conscious & aware of myself and my environment when Ryan took over my body and spoke. So maybe this post will help a researcher one day. I'm baffled how people interested in AI/AGI and consciousness aren't spending more time studying people with DID & multiplicity.

Do people with multiple personality disorders have multiple consciousness?
https://www.quora.com/Do-people-with...-consciousness

[stahrgeyzer]

This therapist says brain imaging research shows that it's common for people to have DID. I started noticing this long ago in people. For example, people of various religious here their God, but the personality & words of that so-called God varies a lot depending what the person believes. Like I've said before, I learned that it's very easy to create "alters." It just takes time. And it takes time to fade away an alter.

I'm am 100% certain that religion is one way to create an alter. One of the most popular on Earth is a God alter, which of course varies a lot depending on the persons beliefs, inner beliefs. Others included Jesus alter, Allah alter, Mother Mary alter, Buddha alter. Do to my "new age" type of beliefs that started in high school, I have an alter that is my higher-self alter. She's by far the nicest alter to me. I also have the "God" and Jesus alter. Do to my mixed beliefs, they haven't been the best alters to me. Although my Archangel Michael alter is pretty awesome! I miss him!

With all of the recent AI research it's forced a lot more academics to study the brain. It's become obvious that there's a whole undiscovered world in the brain, like another Universe.

Video title: The truth about "multiple personalities"
Video description: A veteran trauma-recovery therapist proposes that recent brain-imaging research shows that degrees of "personality splitting" ('multiple personalities") are common and are not a "mental illness." Splitting ranges from minor to severe, depending on the degree of early-childhood nurturance or trauma. One implication is that we can - within limits - retrain different "parts" of our personality to improve our lives.

[stahrgeyzer]

Originally Posted by stahrgeyzer

This therapist says brain imaging research shows that it's common for people to have DID. I started noticing this long ago in people. For example, people of various religious here their God, but the personality & words of that so-called God varies a lot depending what the person believes. Like I've said before, I learned that it's very easy to create "alters." It just takes time. And it takes time to fade away an alter.

I'm am 100% certain that religion is one way to create an alter. One of the most popular on Earth is a God alter, which of course varies a lot depending on the persons beliefs, inner beliefs. Others included Jesus alter, Allah alter, Mother Mary alter, Buddha alter. Do to my "new age" type of beliefs that started in high school, I have an alter that is my higher-self alter. She's by far the nicest alter to me. I also have the "God" and Jesus alter. Do to my mixed beliefs, they haven't been the best alters to me. Although my Archangel Michael alter is pretty awesome! I miss him!

With all of the recent AI research it's forced a lot more academics to study the brain. It's become obvious that there's a whole undiscovered world in the brain, like another Universe.

Video title: The truth about "multiple personalities"
Video description: A veteran trauma-recovery therapist proposes that recent brain-imaging research shows that degrees of "personality splitting" ('multiple personalities") are common and are not a "mental illness." Splitting ranges from minor to severe, depending on the degree of early-childhood nurturance or trauma. One implication is that we can - within limits - retrain different "parts" of our personality to improve our lives.

And yes, alters can be very psychic and amazing. I know a lot of people don't believe in the supernatural, but decades of research and proven to me with any doubt that it's real. I've practically killed myself trying to figure out the nature of reality. Although I don't pretend to yet understand it, I have to say that by far the best known theory is the Simulation theory/hypothesis. I've studied pretty much every religion, philosophy, theories, hypothesis. They just don't explain everything. Old earth religions are the worst at explaining everything, and they're flooded with contradictions, including "gotchas" that academics have discovered that disprove some of them such as the book of Mark being a known forgery in the bible.

A lot of academic scientists are now researching Simulation theory, which they say has long reached the point of becoming a solid theory. There are various versions of Simulation theory. You might have heard the owner of SpaceX and Tesla corp. talk about Simulation theory. That's the version I believe in, which basically states that the simulation does not simulation everything particle in the Universe, but only simulations what you are observing. It's more like a video game or virtual reality type of simulation. Video games don't simulate atoms and subatomic particles in walls because it's not necessary. It only simulates what is necessary, what the person is observing.

In a simulation anything's possible. Including supernatural events. IMO the simulation that we most likely exist in has vivid dream characteristics. Wiccan is a good way to see the nature of reality. They conjure up endless deities. You can conjure up a make believe deity, which are merely alters. Most are probably fragmented alters. Given enough time you can create a full alter. IMO spirit guides and angels are usually full or close to being full alters. People like to differentiate the differences between the different mental disorders such as DID and schizophrenia. For example, they'll say that *typically speaking* alter voices are within and schizophrenia voices are outside. Well, if that's the definition they want to assign some a title such as DID and schizophrenia, then great, but IMO they're both are alters. I can create alters that can speak both within and outside. It's been my experience the DID alters tend to be more complete and stable than schizophrenia alters. Schizophrenia alters can be very dream like, unstable, chaotic, changing, fading, new ones being created on the spot.

Wow, I never knew...it just doesn’t work that way for us....but don’t let that stop you.

[stahrgeyzer]

Originally Posted by AlwaysChanging2

Wow, I never knew...it just doesn’t work that way for us....but don’t let that stop you.

Why would you say that without even asking me for clarification? If you don't want to believe in that theory then fine, but no need to say that. By all means mention one example where that theory does not work.

Originally Posted by stahrgeyzer

Why would you say that without even asking me for clarification? If you don't want to believe in that theory then fine, but no need to say that. By all means mention one example where that theory does not work.

Just saying...my system isn’t built like your systems as you proclaim it. I don't purposely create alters...I don’t create God like religious alters...if that’s what you do...kewl...but it doesn’t work that way for me. Just saying.

My alters emerge out of trauma memories...our survival mechanism from a fragmented mind...there is no want, control, conscious creations and whatever else you proclaim in your way.

If I consciously make or create an alter...we call that an alter ego...a single person living different roles like an actor or rock star....creations done by intent.
A person can have a home body self, but create a Stage Alter or personna like Ziggy Stardust from David Bowie...WWF has a few...Gene Simmons in KISS outfit...all creations.

I’m just saying that what you proclaim doesn't work like that for us. If it does for you, kewl.

I’m just gonna leave it that.

[stahrgeyzer]

I don't know anyone who purposely creates alters. I sure wouldn't. I've done things to see what happens, but those were just experiments.

[Amyjay]

I don't understand much of this thread at all or even see how it relates to dissociative identity disorder. My life is too filled with traumatic flashbacks, trying to reclaim a cohesive sense of self lost to years of surviving sadistic physical sexual and emotional abuse whilst trying to juggle the tasks of every day life to spend time thinking about whether all of this has been someone's fun idea of a computer simulation.