by the way my mcdonalds was yummy on friday

[Fuzzybear]

I haven't had McDonalds for a long time, I'm glad it was yummy

[Fuzzybear]

I don't think there is anything wrong with not being productive all the time. I wish I could eat candy...

[just2b]

So first post on this thread....been very dissociative lately, and more so the past 2 weeks. Having a disruption in therapy, causing me to feel like ive been abandoned, walked out on, left, etc...and its not due to my therapist but rather the process of insurance, authorizations etc...so have had to stop therapy while it gets sorted out. I know logically its temporary but emotionally i feel like SHE has betrayed me, abandoned me, etc...i cant help but feel distant, withdrawn, and dissociated from her.
Everything always feels like a hurricane moving through me, when reality is, just a cloud in the sky.
I cant help these reations, and was wondering how do you cope with it? I get hooked in often, and realize it hrs later or days later. I hate it. As much as i tell myself that i am an adult, my younger parts or teenage parts take over. Any thoughts?

[Fuzzybear]

I'm cutting down on candy and some other stuff grrrr (in fact I've already cut out candy)

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

I don't think there is anything wrong with not being productive all the time. I wish I could eat candy...

their is if it's every single day for months on end

eventually it just feels like you're wasting your life, and in my case, that's one thing I have acheeved

*sighs*

I showered today.

wow it was painfull. a job that should take 10/15 minits at most takes me about 45 now

that's the amount of pain I am in- even with my shower chair
drained me for the day and so then I just sat here eating chips

**** my life

[Fuzzybear]

Does ongoing self flagellation help motivation? I have found it does NOT...

[Fuzzybear]

Showers grrr. They take me much much longer than they ''should'' - over an HOUR - because of some physical issues (which nobody gets so I won't even begin to describe it )

[Desoxyn]

I'm starting to get really scared cuz of everything that's happening. If I didn't still have problems with DP/DR, I would be fine.

People have told me very bizarre things in my life - Especially when I was in the psych hospital. I went through insane things.

I don't know how long I'm going to live. And I feel like everyone will die with my ego - When it dies.. I feel negative like sabotaging myself in a pessimistic way to save myself pain from fear of failure or something.

My parents are not healthy. They will die. When? When will money be worthless? Great depression? Screw the stock market right now. I have a dollar. Phenibut makes me dissociate so I can't take it.

Honestly, I feel like any drug I can't take right now. I feel like my bad trip caused this and I went to a timeline in hell. All of you are sucked in with me into the portal as figures of my imagination.

I need to go to a place that is real. I'm just pure intuition and don't sense things. I'm afraid of DP/DR coming back. It's hell. Worse than psychosis.

[Amyjay]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

Showers grrr. They take me much much longer than they ''should'' - over an HOUR - because of some physical issues (which nobody gets so I won't even begin to describe it )

I bet its because its really hard to shower with paws.

[Claritytoo]

My grown son cane to live with us because he is homeless. He has been dx with Schizophrenia.He has decided to live in his delusions. With two weeks he was becoming aggressive toward me. We don't like him when he gets aggressive. He is scary. Our protector threw him out. He got angrier but left without a problem. He did say he would slit our throat if we came near him or his children. He has said that before to us. Many of us were very scared. We wanted to cry. We are glad he left. He is at a homeless shelter now. I was glad he found a place to sleep. I am in my 60s and have been told by someone outside my head that we will live to 68. I never wanted to know when I would die. I almost died two years ago from an illness. But I have recovered for the most part. My son told me I will die by suicide I don't know. At present I live alone. I have my sister who I am close to but I am often too anxious to spend time with her and her boyfriend. I don't like him. He is a controlling fk. But my sister loves him. So most times I say nothing. I like spending time with her when she is without him. We go garage saleing and other stuff. I love my sister and I know she loves me. She is my bright light. I recently adopted a dog. My other dog died last year and that was very difficult.After I adopted her I realized that one of the reasons I adopted her was to give me structure. I am retired so my day is what I make it. Which doesn't always work well. I can become reclusive and isolate myself. I than get depressed and think about leaving. I don't know how I will go and I don't want to know. I have been looking for a doc who works with DID patients. There isn't anyone near me. I would have to go into the city and I wont right now. So that don't work. I do need to talk to someone. It helps for me to put my stuff out there on PC but I need a person to talk to. To keep me grounded in this reality. I am tired. but not ready to go.

[stahrgeyzer]

Had good therapy today with my DID psychologist. Today he said I have DID and next week he wants to use hypnosis on me which scares me.

[Breaking Dawn]

I'm scared, too!

[Breaking Dawn]

This day has been somewhat difficult. But I'm grateful. I wish so very much for you. And thank you.

[Kathleen83]

Hi Nikdoug. Learning mindfulness techniques helped me.

[Breaking Dawn]

I seem to be learning some new things & consequently rearranging some of my belief particles/components in order to accept these new things.

[stahrgeyzer]

Feel okay. Today my DBT therapist said she talked to my DID therapist. He told her I have DID. She told me our DBT should be finished by the end of the year and asked me if I wanted to continue therapy with her. Kind of scared that she might end our therapy.

[stahrgeyzer]

I told my DBT therapist today that our system doesn't feel safe with the DID therapist. She asked me if I told him. I haven't.

[Breaking Dawn]

Hello, @stahrgeyzer, I was thinking, if it were me, I would tell the DBT therapist that I would like to stay with her, because she has cared enough to learn these DBT skills to help people like me, so she might be good at regular therapy. Can you try her out for a while & look further if she isn't right for you?

[stahrgeyzer]

Hi Breaking Dawn, that's true. She's good at therapy so I'll see if she'll be my therapist longer.

[stahrgeyzer]

Don't feel well emotionally & physically but hanging in there thanks to dbt.

[stahrgeyzer]

I feel scattered, like I want to go in a 1000 directions. It's ok, I love them/us and encourage them to front but sometimes feels like a lot.

[Amyjay]

I am working hard to practise grounding skills and self-care skills everyday. It's going to be super important over the next few months.

[stahrgeyzer]

Feeling very dissociated but everything's fine. Probably will go for a nice long walk soon.