[tracy33]

I lost 70 pounds over the past year and a half. Part of it due to weight loss from Topamax, some from Slim Fast and the remainder from the ED I developed. I just plain restricted. I've been back to sort of eating normal. I ate alot of junk over the holidays. My jeans are tight.
I want to go back on Slim Fast. Just to lose about 10 pounds, if that. I haven't weighted myself (I'm afraid to ) to see how much I've gained.
Starting the day with a Slim Fast shake sets that day off on the right foot.
For some reason, eating a bowl of cereal makes me hungrier and I crave sweets afterward.
I think if I could do the SlimFast plan for a little while, I'll be able to lose what I need to and be OK.
My husband is totally against it. He says I look great and can't notice that I've gained. (yeah, right!) He says that I have an eating disorder (I do ) and this will not be good for me. He's been to my therapist before when she said I was on the verge of hospitalization. He's willing to go with me to see her next week to settle this argument over the SlimFast.
My point is that it will not hurt me. I am not happy. I am heavier and feel so fat and it shows.
He says I want to do it the lazy way. All I do is lay around. Get up and move, he says. Get active.
I just can't stop eating. SlimFast WILL help. I need help!
Any comments? Suggestions?

[krazibean]

how tall are you/what do you weigh right now? that will give us an idea of whether it is safe for you to lose weight. Because with ED's our bodies are distorted, and you might see yourself as fatter. If it is safe for you to lose a few of the holiday pounds, i see no problem with slimfast because it is a diet plan, and at least you don't plan on starving yourself. I don't agree with your husband that your doing it the lazy way. Yes, being active helps losing weight along, but it is not the only thing that needs to be looked at when trying to lose weight. Plus, i thought he said he doesn't want you to lose weight, why does he want you to get active to do it then????? Talk to your therapist about this. if you are on the verge of hospitilization right now then its not a good idea. If your therapist says its ok if you want to lose a few pounds, as long as you do it SAFELY, then there is no problem with slim fast and feeling better. But please dive into this more with your therapist about WHY you think being thinner=happier. take care.

[Perna]

If you have a restrictive eating disorder then losing any weight is not for you right now. You have to conquer the eating disorder and your thinking you are "fat". If other, independent people do not think you should do this, your husband and therapist who only want what is best for you (which you cannot be relied on to "want" because of your disorder), then I would go with them.

As krazibean says, being fatter/thinner has nothing to with happiness. Losing weight should not be a "goal" unless you are obese and facing medical problems as a result. Weight is not about beauty, it's about nourishing your body properly and being healthy.

[tracy33]

I'm at a healthy weight right now. I'm afraid to get on the scale, but my guess is that I'm up to 126, 127 pounds. I'm 5'4".And a half. Med-large frame. My lowest was 116. And I looked very thin. That's when they were threatening hospitalization. Not necessarily because I looked bad, but becase I was eating as low as 200 calories a day.
I want to be doing that now. That's the problem. I think SlimFast will help get me there. I'm afraid to say it, but that's how I think my Ed started. I was taking the Slimfast and losing weight and just wanting to keep losing and eventually cut out the slimfast altogether.
I know it's sick to say, but I feel better when my Ed kicks in.
Do you know what I mean?
I just can't stand myself right now. I feel so huge. Even my face looks fat!

Please think what your ED will do to your body over the long term.... that might help you decide to go the healthy way... the more firmly "rooted" your ED becomes.. the harder it is to shake... and the longer it goes on... the more damage will be done... though the damage may not show up for several years... and then.. then... you will say "why, why.. did I do this"... so fight to remain healthy... and if you want to lose weight... do it healthy....

[silver_queen]

Ok, if you really are the weight you guess you're at, then you're at a perfectly healthy weight and not 'fat' as in 'overweight' at all. I am having a similar problem in that I'm now on the lower side of 'normal' BMI but still look fat (to me, anyway). Somebody suggested to me that toning up would be good - so that you actually look thinner because your muscles are fit, but your weight is the same. But maybe you don't want to stay the same weight.

It does sound quite a good idea taking the slimfast. I always thought it was rubbish but I just looked up their website and at least you get good doses of vits and minerals in the portions. I think though that if you start using it as a meal substitute you will soon start cutting it down. So maybe you could decide on a calorie limit which you will try to get as near as possible to? For example right now my target is to eat 800 calories per day. I know it's not much but it feels a lot and I want to go lower than that but I know it's counterproductive because it brings on binges and 800 calories is better than the 500 calories per day I was eating for a while. A woman who is 'slimming' is supposed to eat a minimum of 1200 calories a day...

So if you too tried to eat 800 calories per day, you could say have: 2 slimfast meals (c.550 calories) and then have a light meal (small tin of beans with one slice of toast, or two boiled eggs (with yolk) with a slice of bread/ toast ) or if you had just one slimfast meal it would give you some more flexibility., you see? But I am not sure how much you are currently eating and if you'll be able to eat 800 calories per day, or if you're eating that much now or more...

[Perna]

If you are afraid of the scale, don't know how much you weigh, I would not decide to lose weight or get involved with food until I had resolved that. Focusing on the food and how many calories it has or how many one can eat and still remain healthy, etc. is the wrong focus, in my opinion. One needs to focus on one's LIFE, no the food. If you are at a healthy weight, then losing should not be a concern. But, not even knowing what your weight is, that is a concern.

[Ocean13]

Okay, here's the thing....What if Slim Fast was gone..forever..tomorrow? How will you lose weight healthy? You said you don't want to eat..but we must eat to survive. Slim Fast is a temporary solution. You need to try to win this battle the healthy way. If your husband says you need to get up and move..make him move with you. A partnership to lose weight is better than trying to do it alone. Take some cooking classes-how to cook light and healthy.

Understand your husband is concerned because ED are serious. If you want kids (assuming you don't have any yet) you may ruin your chances with an ED if you lose your period, start having health problems, etc. If you have kids the concern may be are you passing down the ED habits to them? Your husband wants you alive, healthy and 100% with him. He may not know how to support you the way you want to be supported but he's trying.

Best of Luck to you!

Ocean

[Amie2]

Hi Tracy,

You have already admitted that taking slim fast will likely take you down the road of your eating disorder so really why do it. Eating real food when you have an eating disorder is important. Maybe cereal isn't enough, since you are still hungry afterwards. Add a slice of toast or something. It really does sound like your husband is concerned. And you know that your perception is skewed. So you feeling fat does not necessarily mean that you are fat. You also have to watch exercising with the intent of losing weight when you have an eating disorder. Take walks with your husband or do yoga to feel more grounded in your body. Do the things that you know are good for you and not those that feed the eating disorder. I wish the best for you.

Amie

[tracy33]

I just wanted to thank everyone for their replies. I am still fitting into my size 0,1 and 3 jeans. Even though I know I gained weight, I've come to the decision that I will continue to eat like I have been because I am enjoying food. I am going to start on the eliptical that we have here at the house once I get over my cold. I am starting to think in healthier terms. I feel like I'd rather be in great physical shape with great abs and nice biceps. I want to be healthy. It's going to be a battle, because a little part of my brain still wants to go for the anorexic look and behaviors. i just know it bothered me when my 7 year old stepdaughter told me she wanted to be skinny. She sees the way I am. And one morning she told me she was proud of me because I ate breakfast before I drank my energy drink. ( The drink helps me lose my appetite.) I just don't want her to have a problem. She has enough to deal with already.
Well, I'm going to have a pizza and a beer. Maybe two slices!!

[BalishBun]

i love chocolate slim fast! mmmm