How are you feeling right now #3

Sad mixed emotions

I am feeling low and depressed.I am so alone most of the time.I went no contact from my narcissist mum.I was two months away from her.I am visiting her on Tuesday.I will only stay an hour,hopefully she won't do me any harm then I can stay away again another two months.It is a miserable time of year!I am feeling defeated.

Freezing. I need to put on a 3rd pair of socks.

Very sad and confused

lonely and depressed----can't get out of my own way---plenty to do---trying to climb out---hoping helping out at the 'soup kitchen' tomorrow helps...something has to break...

I am feeling disappointed in myself as my diabetes has been out of control for years and now there is protein in my urine and tests indicate early kidney damage.

I am also upset as I am visiting mum tomorrow who is a narcissist,and today on the phone she was trying to make me text my sister who is also a narcissist and my worst enemy,I am 100% no contact with her.Mum tried to force me to text her to tell her I will be round at mum's tomorrow.I got angry and asserted my boundary.I won't text her I said. But it upset me.

I feel good on the other hand cos I stuck to day 1 plan of eating 1200 calories a day.It went well and I stuck to it today.

Tired. Just really tired. And my back hurts from sitting at the computer. Disappointed in myself, because I'm eating more, and gaining weight. Which reminds me that a week or so ago at the gym, I over heard a man and woman talking at the treadmills. He was saying (and she was nodding) "What overweight people don't understand..." I am so sure that whatever the **** he said, overweight people do understand very well. I'm also pretty ****ing sure what he said was false and from misleading information.

Tired up to early today

A bit better not much though still pretty sad

Not too bad today.I visited mum and that went well,I was pleased to see her.I had an enjoyable time at the cinema complex,watched a film.I am sticking to my 1200 calorie diet and feel quite well physically as I am eating healthy foods.My blood sugar levels have come down.My mood is ok not too low and depressed as it usually is.

Anxious about therapy tonight

I am in copious amounts of pain with frustration. As I have a kidney infection and mental health centre didn’t care to be compassionate today about me not coming for a group therapy session but threatened me instead. That’s the frustrated part there is also a cognitive issue part where I have been 4 days prior to the kidney infection diagnosis seemed like I was hearing one thing and saying another but some times it wouldn’t come out as anything either. So when it rains it definitely pours in my life.

I ate some gelato and I now have really bad stomach cramps. Maybe I shouldn’t have bought it on clearance.

Tired and sad

I am tired,fed up ,bored of doing the same things and going to the same places.Lonely,fed up of being on my own,and my life is stagnant,going nowhere.I don't see as much of my niece as I'd like.Apart from her there is no one,meeting people feels like a chore.I hate being all alone but I don't like mixing and having to socialise either.When I do try to make friends,at least always in the past,I attract users who abuse me and think I am stupid and gullible.Maybe God wants me to be alone this life?I feel unloved and unwanted.

Really depressed

Half functional

I am feeling ok again today.That is the trouble with me I can be rock bottom one day and ok the next then back down again the next.It is unsettling and destabilising.I don't enjoy the days I feel seriously depressed at all.I just have to do my best to get through it.Today wasn't a bad day mood wise,but it has been seriously cold outside,the weather is minus 10 outside,we haven't had snow yet in our neighbourhood but it is expected.I am trying to get the house warm and keep it that way,the cats didn't stay out longer than five minutes today,they came right back indoors.Poor loves it is freezing for them.
Tonight I am cosy warm,wrapped up on the settee with blankets and I am ok.

Tired but ok

Tired, depressed, bored, cold, lonely

Really tired and sleep deprived.

Tired and sad

I'm tired, didn't want to get up today, and depressed of course.

Sad.......................................................

I took two .5 Xanax about 2 hours ago. So I’m feeling pretty spacey and tired right now.