Pet Peeve or Insecurity?

These are just MY feelings, ok? I own the problem. It's MINE. This isn't meant to start arguments or discention and I'm aware that it's an option provided by Doc John, with good reason, I suppose. It makes some people comfortable or feel safer; why, I don't understand. But what gets ME is to check to see which of my friends are online and find Annonymous members CHECKING to see who's online!! Makes me feel SPIED ON!

I'm sorry Tomi. I am not visible on the online screen but I am here. I go in occasionally to see who is online for chat reasons but I cant get into chat so I havent done it in a while. I am sorry you feel spied on Mama.

((((((((((((((((((Tomi)))))))))))))))))))

So you're one of 'em, eh? LOL How can I get upset with you when you call me "mama"? hehehehe

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{))))Jen((((}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} Ooooooooo! Squishy hugs!!!!!!

Sometimes I am invisible too, if you want to know why, willing to discuss it. Might have been me you saw drifting her invisible self on by, I checked who was online cause I wanted to msg a mod who was active.

So here I am, visible at the moment, waving my hands, me me me I did it! I might very well go poof again into near invisibility, catch me if you can!


Sneaky Sarah

I know sometimes when I'm not really up to chatting or posting I might swing by and check to see who's online, and if YOU are or another I'm expecting a PM or such from... then seeing you online would cause me to sign in.

I was visible for a while. Until someone messaged me asking me why I was doing a certain thing. Talk about feeling like I am being watched! Going back to invisible for a while.

I know you don't like the invisible option. But it is what it is, Tomi. I hope you can understand the reasoning behind it. You're entitled to your feelings, of course.

Why does it bother you when a registered member checks who is online as opposed to unregistered members who are checking. That would make me more uncomfortable personally.

I go invisable/anonymous some times too. I just go through periods of peranoia and insecurity where I don't feel safe anywhere so I'm sure I've been one invisable/anonymous checking who's on line before. I don't like seeing invisable/anonymous ppl there either when I'm checking but I figure they must be going through the same I do. I've never meant to hurt or scare anyone by doing that.
Heck, I feel bad checking who's on line when I'm visable figure that one out (rolls eyes) LOL!!!

larks

Be careful what you ask for! I just might be tempted to hunt you down! hehehe

Should have mentioned before but it didn't come to me then. It waited until I sent the post! LOL Ya know? It really doesn't matter why people do it. It just... I don't know! It just! LOL Like I said, could it be my insecurities??

Really? REEEEEELY??? Hmmm...

There have been a couple of times I've visited without signing in and I'll read a post and get all flustered 'cause I'll want to respond and have to sing in! Weir, huh? Oh well... different strokes, eh? LOL

Yep yet another thing that was my fault. GO figure! Sorry Erin! Sorry Tomi for being invisible too at times.

Beth

HaHa!! I know who you're talking about! I don't blame you there one little bit!

It's not so much the registered members (Invisible) checking that bothers me as the ANNONYMOUS people! Maybe some are registered but you don't know! I feel the same way as you about strangers. Like, why are they checking to see who's online? It's not like they can PM us and stuff! Maybe I'm lumping everyone into the same group.

LOL Don't know what you're talking about, Bethy. I never have to go looking for you! You're always THERE!

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Bethy}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

LOL Don't roll them eyes at me, girl! Hey, I have enough trouble trying to figure out why invisible/annonymous people bother me. If you ever figure it out, would you let me know, please? It might give me an insight. If I figure out why it bothers me, I promise to let you know, ok? hehehe

Hmmm you do it, and it's okay... but others do it and it bothers you... wouldn't that sound like a control issue to you, too?

LOL Your my "Mama Tomi"....I love it

september hon I feel the same way

Some of the anonymous people are actually registered people. If you stay logged on but aren't actively roaming around the site, after 15 minutes you get bumped down to anonymous status. So if the last page you were looking at before the phone rang, or your kid screamed for your attention, or the cat yacked up their dinner and you need to clean it up, was the "who's online" page, that's where the anonymous person's presence will show up. If you'll look closer, sometimes it's "my home" that they're at, so it's got to be a member.

What are you talking about? Just 'cause I did it when there was a big argument going on eons ago doesn't mean I continue to do it all the time! That sure feels like an accusation to me and I'm not enjoying the feeling, Hun.

hehehe It takes me back to my childhood when all of my cousins called "the other" (gmother) Mama Tila. Kind of a cultural thing. I love it, too, but I love YOU more!!!

Thank you, {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Bebop!!}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I knew someone would understand me!

Thanks for explaining that! I had NO clue about dropping down to the annonymous level when you stay inactive for a while! How did you find that out?? How come I didn't know??

sweetie? you're posting on a public Internet board and your'e feeling spied on? hmmmmmm

sorry you feel that way but respect those as your feelings and perceptions about this place.

personally? we'd say a mixture of pet peeve and insecurity to the question posed in the subject line.

funny how this comes up again and again in different forms from different members. good post as it shows how this community and its people grow and change over time.

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sweetie? you're posting on a public Internet board and your'e feeling spied on? hmmmmmm

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LOL Did I say it made any sense? May I hide behind the quote "Feelings aren't good or bad, they just are"?? Isn't it strange that I never stop to think about people who have no intention of getting help from what we post but are just voyeurs?? You've given me food for thought, Zen! Thanks!

Love ya too Mama