What does it take?

What I mean is, how do we decide what our lives are all about? Some things we admit, some things we deny. I suspect--or I think?--that there are some issues that I know are true, but I would rather deny and do deny. We determine our lives by what makes us comfortable for the moment. Sometimes I think that I can rationalize almost anything to make whatever is wrong right. Know what I mean? I hope that I am not too confusing. If a doctor would ask me about one particular subject, I would laugh and say, "But I like my bad habits." My bad habits make me feel good. I like to tell myself that it's healthy to skip meals, and so on. Anyone willing to take a stab at these ideas?

well skipping a meal, is not a good thing.. i have sufferd with an eating disorder for over 13 years, so not eating, is not a good thing.

What type of Bad habits are you talking about besides not eating one meal???? And why do they make you feel so good???

<font color=purple>The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost.
- G.K. Chesterton
<font color=purple>

Ok, so you like your bad habits. I can understand that. I smoke and I like it. I have no thought of ever quitting until they put me in the hospital or in my grave. But is it worth it to take a long drag off a cigarette in the end? I doubt it. I'll be sorry when I have to travel with my oxygen tank... and dying isn't going to be a breeze. When I get so fed up with not having some creature comforts and say "the heck with it!" and overspend, yeah, it's fun while I'm buying, but then I hurt the rest of the month.

It just boils down to how much you are really willing to pay in the end.

Just something to think about.

<font color=blue>Don't die with your music still in you.</font color=blue>

Yeah, I think some of my habits I like also. They're bad,but it makes me feel good when i'm really down. But yeah,skipping a meal isn't good,well..I do..but it's not good if you start skipping more than one meal and so on... it does lead to a disorder,which is hard to get back into eating....
I don't know... (((((inkblot)))))

~*~A million words would not bring you back,I know because of tried. Neither would a million tears,I know because i've cried.~*~
~~~~Sabrina~~~~~~~

I think our vices are escapes from what we feel inside. Or maybe just a way to feel better when we feel bad. The irony is, after we've indulged, we feel bad about indulging. Rationalizing is a dangerous area. We can rationalize that nuclear weapons are good defenses.... until one blows up in our back yard.

"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but rising every time we fall." Confucius

Well, as far as that bad habit I mentioned, I, um, tend to skip more than one meal. But I do make sure that I get calories of some sort like in a soda or juice or something. I have at times gone the whole day without any solid food, just liquids. Or maybe a cookie or popcorn, or something small and too basic like that. I might have a sandwich but nothing more. But then I also have phases where I will eat "normally"--meaning two or three meals in a day. Not always entirely nutrutious meals, but nonetheless meals. The eating thing is probably my main bad habit. But I often times will take caffeine pills during these "alternate eating habits", too. I really don't have habits any worse than these, but there are others that contribute I'm sure to the eating habits. My weight is usually pretty much maintained (give or take, of course) depending how long the no-eating phase is.

Why do I like the way I feel? Well, I like to feel thin. I know that I am thin and I intend to stay that way. I like the way "thin" feels. My weight is in the lower end of normal range right now and usually is thereabouts. Sometimes though, I admit it bothers me about being thin because I feel my ribs poking, like today. It's not comfortable, but it doesn't hurt like it did once before when I was like maybe 100 pounds at most. I never knew till then that being thin could cause physical pain. But that was 20 pounds less than I about weigh now. Something to think about. How do I really feel?

Have you checked out our eating disorders page.. The people in there may be able to help you see what you are doing wrong, and why it feels so right..
i post in there sometimes.. When i have a problem with my eating again..

I know how you feel, but being thin is not always a good thing.. You look undernourshed and look like skin and bones.. That is not good..
We all need some sort of musle on our bodys are in teh winter we shall freeze

<font color=purple>The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost.
- G.K. Chesterton
<font color=purple>

I read with interest your post about bad habits. Many people suffering from depression use these bad habits to escape the reality that is their life or to give them a rush to make them feel good. Escapes can include alcohol, drugs, eating, gambling, self injury, sex, etc.

I fought off my depression by seeking sexual encounters. And, as much as most people would first think that this is deviant behavior (and it is) what I have learned on this board is that the reasons for doing it are so similar to other behaviors such as eating or self injury. Many of the triggers of the behavior are the same. The way you feel before and after the behavior are the same.

I have gotten my behavior under control for the past three months. It took me losing a woman that was the love of my life to shock me into doing something. I would feel terrible after acting out. I would feel guilt and shame, but nothing like the shame of being discovered.

I need to give some thought to your statement "we determine our lives by what makes us comfortable at the moment". On the one hand it's true that these momentary indulgences can wind up having a significant impact on our lives. God knows mine has changed my life, I lost the love of my life forever. But, we really should determine our lives by, not the moment, but by a series of actions taken to achieve our long term goals. Right now I am not at that point myself. I am simply trrying to survive another day. Trying to get over the shame, guilt and humiliation. Trying to get over the loneliness and isolation.

The first step is realiziaing that we are involved in behaviors that are going to negatively impact our lives. We have to be honest with ourselves. Then comes the committment and hard work to want to change.

Hi. I go to most all the different boards here, including the ED one. I haven't really fully accepted that maybe that is the problem. The possibility has been mentioned by one or two others in the past, so I know that it is something to think about. I just feel so confident and positive during these phases! So, of course I enjoy my bad habits. Like I said, there are times when my eating patters are more normalized and I don't care so much or minimally about what I look like, etc. I don't know. It's just that I worry about physical effects and damage to my body. I don't know how my life affects my body. It's like how do I know if any damage is being done if I can't see it? I think this is another area where denial probably comes in because nobody has said anything that it's happened yet. I don't know. I don't have a therapist right now. And even when or if I would, it's very, very hard for me to be that honest and tell a therapist when there is a change in my eating habits or attitudes. I tend to tell things long after the fact of a situation when its "safe".

ok, now that helps me to understand a little more about you.

you are like me in some ascpets I never wanted to tell anyone I was not eating till it was almost too late.
But I knwo now that is not the correct way to do it....

You will find the comfort zone someday, and be able to talk more freely with a thearpist, just try is all I am asking or at least a pdoc

<font color=purple>The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost.
- G.K. Chesterton
<font color=purple>