[Melinae]

I'm researching suicide methods on a newsgroup and reading posts made by people who need partners in "crime". A month ago I found about this place online but wasn't ready to start reading. (now I am?) I feel I'm inching ever closer to the "inevitable". But I have not hurt myself in any way, yet. I figure that I want to do it as efficiently as possible. Should I go to a hospital? How would they help me?

[Miss Laura]

I think you need to go to the hospital NOW!!!

I think you need to play it safe and go to the ER and tell them what you told us

[Melinae]

Originally Posted by Miss Laura

I think you need to go to the hospital NOW!!!

I think you need to play it safe and go to the ER and tell them what you told us

Miss Laura, hi and thanks :-) But it's not like I'm planning to do something <now>. Perhaps down the line? (Unless my life drastically changes). Should I still go?

[bebop]

yes go now!

[Miss Laura]

Hi there, Is there any way you can call a help line? In the UK there is the Samaritians etc unsure about other countries. If you don't want to do that can you not call your Psych, GP, Nurse or someone who can talk to you and see what solutions they come up with????

I think you should play it safe, if your thinking about doing somthing in the near future be safe!!!

[pgrundy]

You should tell a medical professional exactly what you told a bunch of people on the internet just now. And you should do it as soon as possible.

When I did that, they sent me to the ER and the ER doc put me in the hospital for a week. Yes it was upsetting, but it probably saved my life. I'm on meds that work now, have some decent support, and wouldn't even think about harming myself.

That's not how it always goes, but you shouldn't play with this. It's not a game, it's a medical emergency. Treat it like one so you can get well.

Good luck.

[lynn P.]

If you have a therapist, then you should make an appointment ASAP. If you don't have a therapist, then you should go to the ER. Please don't go on any of those sites that give advice how to end your life.

There's a famous case and you may have read about it in your country, because a UK woman was nice enough to blow the whistle and call U.S. police - she never gave up. Anyway a man named William M. Dinkel was found guilty of assisting 2 suicides - he befriended people on these kind of sites and coached them how to end their lives. It's a shame there are evil people like this. He even pretended he wanted to do the same to convince them to do it. You can google his name.

Here is a reputable, compassionate site to look at:

www.metanoia.org/suicide/

[Yoda]

I agree with others that if you are seriously considering taking your own life you need to call your psychiatrist or go to ED.

Stay away from those sites that people say they are looking for partners in suicide pacts. Some people go to those sites and take advantage of depressed partners like it is a game. Seriously. There have been some arrests but still more are out there.

http://suicidehotlines.com/

Hello, Melinae.

Some recommended resources and hotlines include:

http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
http://www.suicide.org/
http://www.hopeline.com/
http://www.suicideforum.com/

If you are in crisis, calling 911 is the first option.

Choose to live:

http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/

[Can't Stop Crying]

Go to the ER, they will evaluate you and professionals will decide what is in your best interest. PLEASE stay away from sites that encourage/support suicide...I've been to them and found thoughts in my head that weren't my own, stick to sites that encourage you to choose life and support that decision. I thought these people on the pro-suicide site were my "friends" and understood my pain - I was so wrong! Pro-suicide sites are full of people who think it's a game and enjoy messing with people's emotions. Even when they involve "pacts" the leader does not follow through...just finds another group of hurting people to manipulate. Please stay safe!

[turquoisesea]

I understand your reluctance to go to the ER I really do. It might be the best thing for you. But regardless of that decision you MUST go to a doctor about this - be it your general doctor, a therapist, etc ASAP. If things are getting this bad something is going wrong, and your life is more important than any inconvenience reaching out of help can cause.

Take care!

Originally Posted by Melinae

I'm researching suicide methods on a newsgroup and reading posts made by people who need partners in "crime". A month ago I found about this place online but wasn't ready to start reading. (now I am?) I feel I'm inching ever closer to the "inevitable". But I have not hurt myself in any way, yet. I figure that I want to do it as efficiently as possible. Should I go to a hospital? How would they help me?

Originally Posted by pgrundy

You should tell a medical professional exactly what you told a bunch of people on the internet just now. And you should do it as soon as possible.

When I did that, they sent me to the ER and the ER doc put me in the hospital for a week. Yes it was upsetting, but it probably saved my life. I'm on meds that work now, have some decent support, and wouldn't even think about harming myself.

That's not how it always goes, but you shouldn't play with this. It's not a game, it's a medical emergency. Treat it like one so you can get well.

Good luck.

Originally Posted by TheByzantine

Hello, Melinae.

Some recommended resources and hotlines include:

http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
http://www.suicide.org/
http://www.hopeline.com/
http://www.suicideforum.com/

If you are in crisis, calling 911 is the first option.

Choose to live:

http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/

Originally Posted by Can't Stop Crying

Go to the ER, they will evaluate you and professionals will decide what is in your best interest. PLEASE stay away from sites that encourage/support suicide...I've been to them and found thoughts in my head that weren't my own, stick to sites that encourage you to choose life and support that decision. I thought these people on the pro-suicide site were my "friends" and understood my pain - I was so wrong! Pro-suicide sites are full of people who think it's a game and enjoy messing with people's emotions. Even when they involve "pacts" the leader does not follow through...just finds another group of hurting people to manipulate. Please stay safe!

I hope you have already gone for help but I just wanted to echo everyone else.

I spent 2 weeks "researching' options and calling hotlines like the ones The Byzantine suggested before I finally went to an ER and told them "I'm contemplating SUI...can you please help me." They admitted me immediately and it was the smartest thing I could have done.

Those so called pacts people made are usually frauds and can be very dangerous people to get involved with.

Please go now, get help. You will be glad you did.

[Melinae]

Thank you to all of you.......

I have not gone yet. Maybe I'll go tomorrow. The linked resources look good....

I do have a good therapist but I'm not sure what she could do. I told her I feel I need some kind of intensive therapy in conjunction with hers but she said it sounds like I'm looking for a magic cure and the only way out of my troubles is by doing inner child work......which is going to take a looong time and I'm desperate right now.

I guess I'm of the mind that sometimes suicide should be an option. Getting ****ed up by my parents wasn't what I envisioned when I signed up for this thing called life, nor was having to carry a ton of bricks on my back for the rest of my life. I did not sign up for this so why should I suffer like this?? People always tell me to hang on, that things will get better, and they haven't! (maybe because i have not learned how to manage some fiends and beasts - tendency to isolate, to withdraw, to sink into depression). It hurts to talk to people, any people at all- physically and emotionally. My voice never sounds like what it should be. people often can't hear what I say and I have to squeeze any remaining energy I had left to repeat myself louder... my throat always feels clamped, tense, drowning... I can't really feel myself when I interact with others, so I've been avoiding everyone. I feel detached from myself even now as I'm typing. I feel that my life has been a joke and I'm losing hope for myself. I'm stuck in a difficult life situation (a year now) and don't know what will happen. I don't think anything good will happen. Not with the worsening economy... and I've had more than enough time to look for work so I could move out of here, but I haven't even started. fears, self-doubt, terror, self-hate. I'm just so tired.
(There's more but that'll be it for now)....

gathering courage for tomorrow......

[Melinae]

Originally Posted by jadedmoonbeam

I hope you have already gone for help but I just wanted to echo everyone else.

I spent 2 weeks "researching' options and calling hotlines like the ones The Byzantine suggested before I finally went to an ER and told them "I'm contemplating SUI...can you please help me." They admitted me immediately and it was the smartest thing I could have done.

Those so called pacts people made are usually frauds and can be very dangerous people to get involved with.

Please go now, get help. You will be glad you did.

I'll go tomorrow after my doctor appointment. Thank you for encouraging! :-) Such a relief that they helped you so tremendously.

[Taonuviel]

You could bring it up in your doctor's appointment!

Generally, whether you should go to the ER or a different location depends on your location and insurance status. If you're in the US call 1-800-273-TALK to get the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (website link was given by someone earlier) and your call will be directed to the nearest call center to you. They'll know what resources are in your area and may direct you to a mental health access center or other services without going through the ER. This is absolutely what I would recommend if you lived in my area, especially if you have Medicaid or are uninsured, but I don't know what the centers are like elsewhere.

If you have any fears or anxiety about taking a step like this, try to think of it this way: if you're feeling so crappy that suicide is on your mind, what could really be so bad about trying out emergency help before ending everything? You can't come back from suicide. But SO MANY people, including me, have found relief from seeking out intensive, emergency help.

[billieJ]

You appear to be a danger to yourself. If you can't get into a hospital any other way, go to ER and ask for a mental health evaluation. Please do this right away! We are here for you.

[Can't Stop Crying]

Keep us posted, okay?

[Melinae]

Originally Posted by Taonuviel

You could bring it up in your doctor's appointment!

Generally, whether you should go to the ER or a different location depends on your location and insurance status. If you're in the US call 1-800-273-TALK to get the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (website link was given by someone earlier) and your call will be directed to the nearest call center to you. They'll know what resources are in your area and may direct you to a mental health access center or other services without going through the ER. This is absolutely what I would recommend if you lived in my area, especially if you have Medicaid or are uninsured, but I don't know what the centers are like elsewhere.

If you have any fears or anxiety about taking a step like this, try to think of it this way: if you're feeling so crappy that suicide is on your mind, what could really be so bad about trying out emergency help before ending everything? You can't come back from suicide. But SO MANY people, including me, have found relief from seeking out intensive, emergency help.

Taonuviel (nice name!), thanks for all of that information. I forgot all about costs so I called up my health insurance company and they gave me some info (it's $500 per day for an inpatient stay or $1500 per admission...not sure what this means...) plus some local inpatient clinics phone numbers. And I'm looking at the website for NSPL right now.

Originally Posted by billieJ

You appear to be a danger to yourself. If you can't get into a hospital any other way, go to ER and ask for a mental health evaluation. Please do this right away! We are here for you.

Thanks :-) I'll get to the bottom of this...by the end of this week, hopefully

Originally Posted by Can't Stop Crying

Keep us posted, okay?

Okay

Melinae, please consider printing your posts in this thread for your doctor.

Be safe.

[Melinae]

Originally Posted by TheByzantine

Melinae, please consider printing your posts in this thread for your doctor.

Be safe.

Okay. I will try. worst case scenario, I'm just going to look for a second (better?) therapist.

I feel grateful that people here have heard my cry for help and responded so warmly... but a part of me feels like maybe I'm not a good "influence" for the forum right now and like i need to be booted off of here.... to the neverending land of medication, medication and more medication. I've been reading some things about being hospitalized for these sort of things and it does not always seem to help... there is no personal approach or consideration for a human being's suffering. just observing them in a cold and callous environment and then shooing them off so they can get medicated. I would rather approach this calmly and slowly, and if I can find a better route to getting well, one that will be kind and gentle to a sensitive soul, I will take it. Anyway these are just my feelings...as illogical as they may be

I'm researching suicide methods on a newsgroup and reading posts made by people who need partners in "crime". A month ago I found about this place online but wasn't ready to start reading. (now I am?) I feel I'm inching ever closer to the "inevitable". But I have not hurt myself in any way, yet. I figure that I want to do it as efficiently as possible. Should I go to a hospital? How would they help me?

The "inching closer to the inevitable" is what I was responding to. It does not seem like your treatment is working. We only have your words to go by.

I do not understand what you mean by suggesting you are not a good influence for this forum. I thought you were asking for help? You certainly may disregard anything we say while offering our support.

Be safe.

[Taonuviel]

You could also try looking into partial-hospitalization programs - as far as I know they're usually at an inpatient facility, but you only go during the day to see a psychiatrist, therapist and attend groups.

[Miss Laura]

Hey Meline,

how did you get on at your app?

[Melinae]

Just updating, that I haven't thought any of these things since last week...when I decided to look at things from a different angle. Thank you for helping me.

Good for you, Melinae.