A moan about trigger icon!!!!!!

I wasn't trying to get any attention. I didn't know I couldn't double post, I thought it belonged in the therapy section because it is about the stuggles of therapy and it was a poem too, I didn't know which one to post in. It was a mistake and I have said I was sorry many times, but that doesn't seem to matter here. Maybe it is best I just leave this site, I didn't mean to hurt anyone, but it seems like some people don't accept apologies, and would rather attack back and hurt me.

> Some ppl post just for the attention.

How do you feel when you think someone is doing that?
Annoyed? Frustrated? Mad?

Attention is a legitimate need that people have. People are social animals. It isn't the persons fault they didn't get the attention they needed and deserved as children. That they weren't taught skills so that they can comfort and soothe themselves.

When you say someone is posting *just* to get attention... I think that what you really mean to say is that you feel frustrated etc because you don't know how to help them. That is fine... But how about just appreciating it for that and leaving them alone so other people can help them if they are in a better place for that and most importantly... Refraining from judging them.

Please, if you wish to discuss my personal feelings, PM me.

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When you say someone is posting *just* to get attention... I think that what you really mean to say is that you feel frustrated etc because you don't know how to help them

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> Not hardly.

When I say just to get attention, I meant it in the way of pathologically pushing buttons for reactions... attributed, yes, to their disorder.

All in all these are just words here, and have no lasting effect upon me unless I choose it. However, there are many members who are not strong enough to speak up, yet are greatly affected.

Now when you speak of chat, yes, it's frustrating when children demand all the attention in chat, in fact, it makes "chat" as we come to know the idea, impossible. That isn't fair for anyone, don't you agree?

> When I say just to get attention, I meant it in the way of pathologically pushing buttons for reactions

so when you say someone is posting *just* to get attention you mean to say that someone is *pathologically pushing buttons for reactions*.

it seems to me that what you are saying is that people are pathological (which is a judgement, yes and a judgement you aren't really qualified to make). you are also judging that people INTEND to elicit *reactions* for others. so what you are doing is blaming them for your reactions rather than owning your own reactions and seeing that your reactions are a consequence of your judging them negatively.

well since this is about me, I don't need attention from anyone, this is your negative judgement of me.

I don't have any disorders and I am not pathological either. Is attacking my character a positive way to handle this? Isn't this site suppose to be about support? How is saying those mean untrue things about me helping anyone or improving the situation? Gee, I think my mother did these kind of things, my T called it emotional abuse.

and this is relevant to the topic for the reason that (IMO) it makes a great deal of difference whether we consider that:

- people didn't post a trigger warning because they didn't know about that.

vs

- people didn't post a trigger warning because they are *intentionally* trying to elicit a negative reaction from others.

if we give them the benefit of the doubt and point out (gently) that we are triggered in such a way that we are taking ownership of our response then that is much nicer than

not giving them the benefit of the doubt, judging them to be pathological, assuming they intend to trigger us and as a consequence of that... feeling upset.

it is a choice yeah.

but i think it is nicer to give people the benefit of the doubt.

just like i'm sure you would prefer other people to give you the benefit of the doubt rather than judge you.

deep breaths... i think sky is trying to post in support of people who felt triggered. i'm not at all sure that this thread is *solely* about you, though i brought up your post as an example, yes. people were saying that it is becoming more common that people aren't trigger warning their posts and so the issue is greater.

it can be hard to support people without lashing out at their perceived persecutors. of course who is attacking, who is persecuting, who is the victim is in the eye of the beholder...

i kinda like the group dynamics drama triangle kinda stuff... interesting... and in differentiating between ones responses and the state of the world. hard skill to learn. just 'cause someone doesn't see it doesn't mean they *intend* to judge others though ;-)

just like i'm sure you didn't mean to judge sky of 'emotional abuse' though if you judged that she 'intended' to judge you you may have felt 'justified' in judging her...

and round and round we go...

THe very fact that you feel this thread is about you shows a problem, imo. It's about Pegasus reminding all of us to use the Trigger Icon...something that still hasn't reached all the members here yet

BTW </font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
I have suffered from some horrific child abuse and year and half ago I got PTSD .

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> You also speak of T and low self esteem. I am thinking you came here for support for your disorders... and I hope we can proceed to accomodate you on that! TC please!

This was a good reminder, and my honest feeling is that all of you mean well. People don't generally leave off the trigger icons just to be defiant. Sometimes it might be overlooked, or someone might not know. I'm sure that is what this thread is about, and not targeted just at one person. However, I think this has been discussed enough and is getting heated and feelings are getting hurt, so I'm going to lock the thread for now. Enough has been said.

Take Care Everyone,
Rap