whole lot of "stuff" going on

(((Liz))),

I was wondering how you made out. It sounds like you have a couple of people who are not sure how to handle certain challenges and get frustrated and talk down to you, not your fault, "theirs". Try not to let that "trigger you, if you can" often when people are under stress like that they take it out on the "wrong people". Probably, what would help is if you give that person time to calm down and then try to gently "acknowledge" they were stressed and "gently" ask them if they are ok and mention that it takes time to get used to these challenging cases and "yes" it can get frustrating and then try to find something they are doing well so far. Remember what you did training horses that acted out? You just rode through it, just rode through it until they did it enough it wasn't a problem anymore. And then you found that place you could give them a pat too so they were rewarded, same thing with people.

You "are" good at what you do for a reason Liz, you do have "skills", I believe that about you.

OE

The two new bosses met with me to go over the paperwork without the co-worker present. They felt it would be better if they presented the info to the co-worker. The paperwork was a friggin' nightmare! I could hear the conversation when they talked to her (walls in the office are like paper). She tried to say she followed the example I gave her, tried to put it all off on me! I turned the radio in my office up so I couldn't hear what was being said rather than blow up over it. The co-worker has not been in all week. The bosses are wondering if she decided to quit without bothering to actually say "I quit".

I've been struggling with the fibro flare from hades this week. I hurt so much it wakes me up at night. On top of that the fibro fog is so bad I'm not sure what I own name is. Out of self-preservation I've focused on doing what I need to do about my own stuff at work this week.

OE, I was running up hard on a deadline to file the court paperwork the new boss yelled at me about. Waiting for her to consult her boss might have made the paperwork late to file with the court.

On a happy note, I've been trying not to buy into the whole Norman Rockwell version of the "H days", but was feeling kind of sad about not having any plans for Thanksgiving. Turns out a friend of mine is coming down for a few days that week. She'll be here for Thanksgiving! I'm looking forward to cooking the whole traditional dinner!

I hope you have a great Thnaksgiving, i know the cooking is a lot of work, we go to my sisters in laws they do all the cooking!!!

Hi there again ((((( Lizard ))))), so sorry to hear things are somehow going from bad to worse, and all because people are given jobs they are NOT at all qualified to undertake. Hope some 'downtime' this weekend may help to redress the situation. I send you many soft gentle HUGS and I hope that you soon feel a little better ~ a little better is better than no better, if you see what I mean! HUGS. xxxxx

I am in the second week of the fibro flare from hades. The pain is so bad it's waking me at night. I'm so stinkin' tired of this!

Poor dear. Have you tried any of the purported meds for fibro? Lyrica helps a friend of mine.

I am so happy you will be with someone for Thanksgiving!

I hope that co-worker has just quit!

This week was HORRID I'll post about it later. This video expresses what I'm feeling better than I can.

Oops! I didn't realize we aren't supposed to post videos in forums other than the video forum.

The video I posted was for the song "Done" by the Band Perry. It's about someone who id done with a relationship. It says what I've been feeling this week.

I can't take the fibro meds. I tried Lyrica once. I was stoned for days. Savelle effects seretonin levels. Can't tkae it with my anti-depressants. Only other drugs would be narcotics. Can't function if I take them.

The friend who said she is coming for Thanksgiving has a history of cancelling at the last minute. I am going to call her today to make sure she is coming. I don't want to be stuck eating an entire turkey myself!

I'm not a big believer in herbs and natural remedies but have you tried any?
It's probably already been suggested or considered but...
Fibromyalgia Supplements: 5-HTP, Melatonin, St. John's Wort, and More

second day back at work after the holiday break... am overwhelmed and exhausted...

Haven't posted in this thread in ages. Thought I was doing OK, then the manure hit the turbine again. Some times I wonder if this is just what life is and I'm being a self-pitying whiner. Then I think that nah most of the rest of the world doesn't deal with this shite.

I had a horrid day at work today. Part of my job entails dealing with an attorney who represents the Departmenty of Juvenile Justice. The man is a certifiable a-hole. Years ago he got a bee in his bonnet about me and will do whatever he can to throw me under the bus. He did it again today. Our agency created a position to insulate counselors from his BS. That person and our boos both sat on their arses and let him attack me in court this morning. When I commented on it to my boss later in the day she blew me off.

I'm exhausted from long hours. I'm exhausted from bringing work home every night. I'm just flat worn out.

After court a co-worker started carping at me about something that happened a month ago involving her and my boss. I WASN'T INVOLVED IN WHAT HAPPENED, but she *****es at me about it every time we are together. Today I told her that the folks in management are meeting in January to work out a plan so what happened doesn't happen again. Then told her I plan to do whatever they decide we peons should do. She wanted to argue with me about that!

To cap it off I called a friend tonight who told me she was coming for Christmas. I've been planning dinner etc for that day. She told me tonight she's not coming until after Christmas. This person has a history of changing plans at the last minute. This shouldn't be a surprise, still I'm disappointed and frustrated. I would have made other plans for the day if I'd known she wasn't coming.

It's all added up and I'm feeling flattened. Part of me wants to crawl in bed, say f it and have a pity party. A very strong part of me wants to SI tonight. No worries, I won't, but dang the urge to make the outside hurt as much as the inside is strong.

I know myself. Given a bit of time to regroup I'll come up with a game plan how to deal, but the overwhelming urge tonight is to give up, give in and say f it.

(((((((((LL))))))))))))))
I'm so sorry you have had such an awful day. I hate it when people take their anger out on people who did not cause the problem. Remember to take some deep breaths. We are here to support you.

First of all I think you need some serious hugs here

Oh I am so sorry you had to deal with that low life Attorney that tried to push your buttons in court. I am also sorry that your boss blew you off and didn't even take the time to at least validate you and commend you for standing your ground. My guess is that you probably come off being a lot stronger
than you really are and while you "are" competent and you "do" care, you absorb and other people don't see that. That is why the fibro is acting up, that is from your absorbing even though you don't want that to happen.
I get that way too, I could not have a real message, it would hurt too much, my muscles feel like they are badly bruised when they are touched.

I am also sorry that you have a friend that is so unpredictable and can't keep
a commitment, that is very frustrating, have you ever talked to her/him about it? Well, I can tell you that you are not the only one that deals with people like this, after my many years of working at so many parties, I can tell you lots of people fail to show up even when they have committed to it. I have felt bad for so many people who spent so much time making food and having entertainment only to have people not show or show up very late.

Well, maybe it's time for you to make other plans because you know "you" show up.

As far as your boss brushing you off, well, usually when people do that it is because they don't know "how to react or what to say". People are much more closed off these days Liz, it isn't you. Also people don't like confrontation so they often bail out in whatever way they can. I am very sorry you were put into that position because I know you are a professional and you truly care. It is sad now because of how people don't stand up anymore. People are just too afraid of losing their jobs somehow so they put their heads down and yes, even blow people off sadly.

Can you take a nice hot bath and give yourself time to relax and let go for the holidays? Just let things flow along if you can.

more

OE

I just had an ah-ha moment about the attorney and something my boss said. I'm struggling to put it into words...

He is all about power and control. Anything I do he either complains it's not done right, he blind sides me in court or he b!tches to my boss about it in front of me. Last Friday my boss told me that we are going to do whatever he wants.

This is the pattern of my childhood abuse all over again. My father would either change the rules with no warning, blast me out of nowhere for something I'd done or he would b!tch to my mother about me. Mom did nothing to protect me. The new boss' position was created to buffer counselors from the attorney. She's not doing anything to buffer us. Heck, she denies he is doing anything wrong.

OK, insight is all great and wonderful. Now I have to figure out what to do about it.