[itsjustme111]

Sorry all but I cant come on anymore. I had a really bad experience on here and I did not intend on hurting anyones feelings. I never told anyone at anytime that they could not type or talk. I had no control over that. Someone really made me feel like I did not have a right to say what was on my mind and now I am sitting here so upset that I am puking. I have a lot happening too; maybe others should consider that their words can be really hurtful and disrespectful. I did not join to get this. I am on the verge right now and this is not what I need. So all of you take care; sorry if I upset anyone. I care about all of you but I cant deal with this as well. Love u all and thanks for everything.

itsjustme-signing off.

[Fuzzybear]

I don't know what happened, but I will be sorry if you leave ((((((((((((((itsjustme)))))))))))))

[Butterfly_Faerie]

That couldn't have been the bad expeience hon, you did nothing wrong. Chat is chat that's what it's there for.

Are you just having a down time right now?

I hope you will stay, I like talking to you.

<font color=red>~</font color=red><font color=blue>S</font color=blue><font color=green>u</font color=green><font color=blue>n</font color=blue><font color=green>d</font color=green><font color=blue>a</font color=blue><font color=green>n</font color=green><font color=blue>c</font color=blue><font color=green>e</font color=green><font color=red>~</font color=red>

<font color=blue>"Never react emotionally to criticism. Analyze yourself to determine whether it is justified. If it is, correct yourself. Otherwise, go on about your business."</font color=blue>

<font color=black>Norman Vincent Peale</font color=black>

[(JD)]

Just? If this just happened in chat, I'm sorry but you are freaking out about nothing. No one in chat said you couldn't say what you wanted to... and some even said you could... I wasn't paying alot of attention tothat part of the chat because I was trying to get two others who are also having a tough time, to share some. They were sitting too quietly and alone with their feelings.

If it wasn't in chat then let us know what happened and let us all to see what needs to be done to help you OK?

<font color=green> ...slip sliding away... slip sliding away....

[Peanut61]

I don't know what happened, but if you can, I hope you will reconsider and come back!

Your friend, Peanut

<font color=blue>HI FROM PEANUT</font color=blue>

[itsjustme111]

Thanks all. ((Sky)) you have no right to tell me that I am freaking out over nothing. How dare you!! And yes I was told rudely that I should let others speak. Do I control others computers. We were not even talking about anything serious. Its my problem that others had stuff on their minds? I have loved to be here; I like to listen and to help if I can. But I was not going to stare at the computer screen. If someone has something to say; say it. I have been on chat several times and have not been able to say much because others are speaking. And thats fine; I know others are here for help. How dare someone say what they did (and we know who); I was trying to keep my mind busy cause I am desperately trying not to harm myself. If its talk that is just "nothing" or if its serious; then so be it. So whatever, I can do this on my own. Like I have. Things are the way they are; so be it. Before you go tell people that they freaked out; THINK ABOUT HOW U HAVE MADE THEM FEEL. I DONT APPRECIATE IT AT ALL!! LIFE IS NOT EASY; FOR ANYONE. I did not make this chat all about me by any means; I had just finished saying; "Someone else say something". So I guess my magical powers prevented others from speaking or typing. How amazing. You know I had gathered my emotions and I should not have bothered coming on to read any of this. You make comments that u shouldnt. So who freaked out; maybe look in the mirror and think before u want to say such bull.

I apologize to everyone else. I am very angry after reading this. I dont give a crap anymore what happens. Maybe my peace will come. I am tired of life and tired of all the ****** that comes with it. Its amazing that when I had first come into chat; I had verbalized what was going on but was not considered at all when the bull came after. And u know what; I am not the only one that felt this way. I cant say who else was upset but I am not the only one who supposedly "freaked out". Its crap like this that makes people shut down and not want to talk to others. I feel violated for expressing my feelings so I will do what works for me. Shove it down and what takes over; fine; I do not care at all. I hate life, I hate myself, my ex, the fact that I have to see my kids cry and have them grab onto my legs because they have to go to dads. Well enough; I wont win this thing; we all know it. So ****** it; I want to die and that is that. So get mad at me all u want; hate me all u want. Join the crowd. So I will go freak out all by my lonesome. Thanks for the lovely words.

JUST.

[Peanut61]

Hi {{{{{{Just}}}}}}}; tis me, Peanut. I can hear that you are really upset and I know that I have had those same feelings that you are expressing before = when everything seems so very overwhelming and painful and hopeless. But then I have to try to remember that a lot of the way I feel is because of the monster depression, and somehow, just for a minute, step back from the black cloud so that I can see there IS hope and something to live for out there, (even though it seems so very far away).

I'm glad you came back; I came back, too, to check on you, so see === like minds. :-)

I'm going to be keeping you in my thoughts, and, (selfish me :0) ), but I'm hoping that we get a chance to 'read' each other again, soon

Most fondly, your friend, Peanut

<font color=blue>HI FROM PEANUT</font color=blue>

[DocJohn]

Just...... I hear that you're not feeling validated in your feelings and that when you tried to express yourself in chat, others seemed more interested in talking to other people there rather than listening to you. I'm very sorry to hear that.

I don't know exactly what happened since I wasn't there, but sometimes it's pretty easy to not feel heard in a chat room -- I know, I've felt that way myself. Others seem not to care about your problems, or actively ignore you by focusing on others.

I'd encourage you to ignore folks you don't much care for on the community. Not everyone is going to get along with everyone else here -- that's not a reasonable expectation to have with thousands of members. But I do encourage everyone to respect one another here and treat each other how we ourselves would like to be treated. Some people follow these suggestions better than others.

Again, I'm very sorry to hear of your situation and hope you choose to stay.

Best,
DocJohn

[(JD)]

(((Just))) Ok I'm sorry I said you were freaking out.

okay... I was there... but I don't recall anyone telling anyone else they could NOT chat. There were 2 others in chat that had been there quite a while and are more shy than you, and I, and the others who were chatting... which is why I asked if they had something they wanted to share.

Yes, you had asked for someone else to say something. I had PM'd some to see if they wanted to continue without waiting for everyone to talk, to open their own chat room... there were a few newer ppl who might not have known that was possible.

It takes quite a while to have an all-around chat when there are so many in one chat room... and often the quiet come, sit, read, and leave without ever getting to say anything. Also, many can't type near as fast as some of the rest of us, or maybe even read that fast and they have trouble keeping up so they don't have a chance to jump in.

I saw nothing wrong with you asking someone else to say something. You obviously are upset, you were upset in chat, that's why you were able to have so much time to vent... that's why we go there, and why many ppl sit and listen because we all need ppl there when we do need to vent.

Asking for others to share too should not have stopped you from continuing to share... there are often more than one conversation bouncing off those padded chat room walls.

Please don't leave... you are going through a lot of changes right now, and maybe we here are all part of it too... in any event Ihope you feel better soon, and feel welcome to return when you can.

<font color=green> ...slip sliding away... slip sliding away....
<div class="foot">(Edited by SkyBdark on 08/16/04 10:14 AM.)</div>

[Leslie]

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Just)))))))))))))))))))))))

Please don't leave. I was the one being unusally quiet and sky saw this. She knows me and knew something was wrong. Sometimes I like just sitting here and not saying anything. I am looking for ways to help someone else. I was having a hard time that night and yes I was being unusally quiet. This chat room is for everyone and we talk when we need to. I feel so blessed to have this room. I can't thank Doc John enough for this room. I dont feel alone when I am in here . This room means a lot to me and the friends I have made here have been so kind and understanding.

Thanks, Love Leslie

[cms39]

You have helped me by listening in chat, itsjust. I've enjoyed talking to you so much. I thank you for that.

I hope I haven't done anything in chat to upset you. Please come back. You have friends here.

[beacher27]

I don't know what happened but I do know that I have enjoyed every time we were in chat together. I am sorry that you are so upset and I don't want to see you go.

((((((((((((((((((((itsjustme))))))))))))))))))) you have really helped me in the past and I want to be able to help you too. I hope I will see you back in chat soon.

[blackenedangel]

<font color=blue>I am sorry that you had a bad experience, but I do hope you would stay, I really like talking to you and getting replies from you. I wish you wouldn't leave, but if you must I bid you a happy long lasting life. You are so sweet and give everyone good words to think about. You will be missed ever so much. Take Care! Much love and happiness to you!

<font color=blue> Sending Kitten Hugs and Kitten Kisses to you,
Brandi Kathleen aka: Kitten "meow" </font color=blue>
<font color=purple>Cat Kisses
Sandpaper kisses on a cheek or a chin
That is the way for a day to begin!
Sandpaper kisses a cuddle and a purr
I have an alarm clock that is covered in fur.
Author Unknown </font color=purple>

[angel04]

I don't go to chatrooms too often for the very reason you asserted. I am, however, very glad you voiced your hurt feelings whatever the consequences. That's extremely positive. I am really NON-assertive so I admire you for posting your feelings about the situation. I wasn't there so I can't say anything to that but I do hope you stay. Can you simply avoid chat for awhile? I know you have been hurt and I understand your feelings, I just wanted to weigh in my two cents and ask that you stay. If you don't feel you can, I completely understand and wish you all the best.
take care of you. You are the most important right now.
hugs
tina

Per ardua ad astra
Motto of the Royal Canadian Air Force
"through adversity to the stars"
www.jeffgordon.com

[wisewoman]

Are You sure that you were told to stop talking? Or, did you get a flash on your screen saying you would be "booted" for flooding? That is the computer talking, not a person. Hang in there. I can't imagine anyone would have intentionally hurt your feelings. Our feelings are so raw and exposed here at times. Take care of yourself.

[itsjustme111]

Holy moly. I have been trying to read all of this. Took a while. Just a note to say; what happened was not the computer telling me to shut up; lol. It was someone who said that others needed to talk; but not in a nice way. The other member that I was speaking with; we were just talking about cats. Nothing major. I was not there to just stare at the computer screen.
If someone wants to talk well please do. I was in chat to get my mind off of hurting myself so if I seemed to babble; well thats why. Instead of hurting myself, I came on here. Like I have said; many times I have came on with several others in chat. It has been hard to talk in there. I understand that and its okay. I would never tell someone that they are "taking the floor".
I suggest if someone has to speak and can't seem to get in there; just say; can I talk about something I need to.
Yes that is hard to do. Don't think that its easy for me either. I am ashamed of my thoughts and feelings about wanting to die and harming my body. I dont like to tell people that. but if I dont; I will hurt myself. I am sorry to those who were in chat last night. I did not mean to not allow anyone to talk. I can't express enough how much I love to listen to others; I WANT TO HELP. Its hard to help others right now because its hard to even function. When you live on 2-3hrs of sleep a night; for the last 4 months; well you get a little grumpy. Its hard to come up with ideas for others when your brain cant function well. Look at the stupid things I do. Burning myself; falling asleep at the wheel. I am so scared right now. I just want to bury myself in a hole. I dont have any hope right now and I am sorry if my negativity has brought anyone down. I do stand by the fact that I think it was wrong what happened last night in chat. People need to be more tactful when they speak. If someone feels like they have an issue with others; fine, that will happen. We are all people here and we will have problems with each other from time to time.
Just remember that we are all emotional and fragile right now; watch what u say and keep this in mind.
I am not angry at any of u. ((Leslie)) Please dont think it was you I was upset with. I love u dearly and I dont want something like this to change our friendship. I think of you every minute of everyday and I do pray for u dear. I wish I had the answer for everyone; I would fix our difficulties. I am not a hateful person and I am very easy to get along with. If someone hurts me though; I will say so. Thats just me. Like I say, I am not angry with this anymore; its done so lets get over it and move on. I dont want to focus on this. I dont deny that I have feelings of hurt but I will get over it. I am just struggling with keeping safe right now. I cant express enough how scared I am and I am trying to keep a open mind with regards to my kids.
Funny though; did I not say this was just a little note. He He. We all know I babble. lol lol lol. Oh, when I babble; just a hint; I am not doing well. There is something going on; thats all.
itsjustme-being a babbler.
Love u all.

[itsjustme111]

Oh, I wanted to say; Its not that there is anyone that I dont care for in here. I care about all of you. I have been thinking about this and we all are sick in here; or struggling for better terms. We say and do things in our lives that we dont realize could hurt someone else's feelings. I think it was important that I did verbalize this problem cause it makes others aware that this does happen. I dont want anyone to be afraid to talk to me because of this. Honestly everyone; I am a very easy person to get along with; my problem in the past was not saying anything and getting walked on. Not that people do that here. I guess thats why I stayed in an abusive relationship so long and struggling with the after-effects now. Dont be afraid of me or to speak your mind. I want to listen as I love to help when I can.

((DocJohn)); thank you so much for the response to all of this. It means a lot to me. Thanks for taking the time to express your thoughts on this.

Thanks again everyone; this means so much to me how much you all care. We all need a hand to hold and I have many here. You are in my heart and mind. Talk to u soon.....

justme

I was in the chat room when all of this was happening and must have missed all the excitement. I'm glad you're here, and sorry that you had a bad experience.
Blessings,
Jon

[itsjustme111]

Well thanks Jon. Its been really great talking with you. You are very funny; you make us all laugh. I am sry for saying that my faith is gone. It is what I feel right now. But I thank you for the encouragment. After this thing happened with my doc today, well I have no doc. So I am sad because I was relieved that I was getting help but now.........who knows

justme

[Butterfly_Faerie]

Itsjustme,

Then don't talk to the person you don't get along with. Everyone is going to have that problem eventually.

We were all having a bad day in chat, except for maybe jon .

Take care, And don't leave... alot of things can be misinturpeted online, that's all it was.

I'm sorry you are down, I had a good time chatting with you in chat.
I'm not there often either, but I might make it a point to go in more then not.

So stick around, you are wanted here.

<font color=red>~</font color=red><font color=blue>S</font color=blue><font color=green>u</font color=green><font color=blue>n</font color=blue><font color=green>d</font color=green><font color=blue>a</font color=blue><font color=green>n</font color=green><font color=blue>c</font color=blue><font color=green>e</font color=green><font color=red>~</font color=red>

<font color=blue>"Never react emotionally to criticism. Analyze yourself to determine whether it is justified. If it is, correct yourself. Otherwise, go on about your business."</font color=blue>

<font color=black>Norman Vincent Peale</font color=black>