borderlines, DBT

does any of you go to dialectical behavior therapy? I have only just started, but I feel like its too strange for me and I can't concentrate in there anyway. I feel like my bad emotions get ignored in this process, and also every single time I go, I feel frustrated and want to throw stuff. I was just wondering what your thoughts are on this process...
Ally

Ah, the dreaded DBT therapy! I was in that before. It was very stressful, frustrating, and was a great struggle for me at times. But in the long run it seemed to work out. Just try to do the work and I think it will work for you. If you have any questions regarding any of the techniques, I'll be more than happy to help you understand them. PM me anytime. I was in DBT therapy for almost 5 years so I pretty much know them inside and out!

Hang in there and hopefully it will get easier for you.

There's also a site, www.dbtselfhelp.com which has the skills training handouts and lessons, as well as info from those who've been through it before.

Good luck.

gg

is it tough for you? the lady i went too a few months ago was SOOOO mean to me in every way imaginable!

deb

I don't blame you about being frustrated with this form of therapy. I looked at it some time back when I first started looking around for a therapist, but alas, no one in this area was doing it. Which probably is a good thing otherwise I wouldn't have discovered Transactional Analysis.

What DBT seems to try to make you do is train the mind to recognise the appropriate situations to which you are to react in "XXXXX" manner among other things. The problem is, you haven't got a clue on how to catalog them in your mind, because it all gets so lost in the frustration and chaos. This of course starts to get you stressed, then frustrated, then you want to get angry, but at who? The therapist? She's trying to help you, so you can't really get mad at them, so you turn your anger inside because now you're angry because you can't 'get it'. DBT may be fine for some people, but it's not a one size fits all sort of therapy.

What most conventional therapists overlook is where our emotional parts come from.

Ally, take a look/read at the link in my siggy and see if this might help you understand why you get frustrated. Heck, it might help you with the DBT if you have to go to them.

hey. i used to do dbt. it is hard work!!!

concentration... will improve. i think most people have trouble concentrating especially to start with. but attention... is like a muscle and you have to use it to build it up. hopefully... your concentration will improve in time :-)

'I feel like my bad emotions get ignored in this process'.

are you talking about skills training? yeah... skills training... well... it is about improving your concentration (among other things). your emotional state... isn't something that is dealt with in group - but you should be able to process that / talk about that / vent about that in your individual session.

i felt a fairly strong reaction to skills group too. didn't like it. didn't like it at all. but looking back in hindsight... i learned INVALUABLE skills that i still practice (maybe 5 years down the track). i especially loved the mindfullness exercises :-)

one of the things you will be learning...

is that YES you feel frustrated and want to throw stuff...
But...
You don't throw stuff.
It is kind of like feeling the fear and doing it anyway...
Learning that you don't have to act from your emotional state.

but as for the frustration...
i understand yup.
but in skills group you should eventually learn...
how to manage your frustration so it doesn't hurt so much
and how to concentrate DESPITE your frustration.

it is hard...

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I've been to 4 DBT sessions and can hardly stand it. In the first place I also have anxiety, so I hate sharing my homework. I'm starting with the relationship part. I feel so crappy cause I cannot work on relationships, because I have given up on trying. During the individual therapy part, my therapist is weird. I figure it is part of the treatment. It almost seems like he is purposely invalidating me, just like my childhood. It's like I'm not suppose to talk about my problems to anyone, because I'm not relying on myself. Also, if I bring up things that are awful like childhood incest, he'll shrug it off. I think it's because we are not suppose to feel so intense. All I know, I hate this whole deal.