Schizoid and Children

My girlfriend is asking to have a baby and I'm not sure what to do about it.

I suffer from SPD and I'm aware that it is rare for someone such as my self to have a relationship. I consider myself lucky to have found someone who loves me because of who I am, not despite who I am, and can happily work around my condition.

Anyway, I think I'm going off track...

As I've said she want to have a baby, but I'm worried that I might not be able to cope. I'm unavailable for work - so financially having a child would be very stressful. Also part of the reason our relationship works is because live seperatly and I'm given a lot of time to my own devices. (Time alone gives me he breating space I need to face people again). I am also worried that If I was to have a child, would I feel the same towards it as I do to other people. I'm capable of love, but somehow inside I know that this love has selfish roots.

I was wondering what others opinions were about this? Do you know people with SPD who have children? Perhaps you yourself have SPD and children of your own? what are you're experiences of this?

I am not schizoid but I do have children. They are a challenge to get around when trying to deal with my problems. I will be having a freak out and really need to be alone but will have to pull myself together when they walk into the house. In some ways I suppose that is good but I can't help but wonder if I could have time and space to myself could I work through this garbage faster? Also I am constantly watching them, frightened that I may mess them up the way I was messed up. I watch my daughter struggle with her anxiety and know that I did that to her. I know I abused her in the beginning of her life because I was sick. I am a good mother now but I know what I have done and hurt for both my kids. My son has a contanst need to be acknowleged. He has inturrupted me 3 times during the writing of this post. Once for a hug. He is 13 and still seeks hugs from throughout the day to make sure everything is ok. I worry.
Zen

I'm not schizoid (but do have some features as well as borderline) and have 2 children. I do not work (Disability) and we do the best we can. There are a lot of resources out there for us. Good luck!!!

I am schizoid and understand that living seperately probably makes the relationship soo much better and work better. I would hate to live with someone to be honest. BUT, that said...with children, I think it may be different. I feel strongly that people should only have children if they are willing to go the extra mile to be a great parent. Personally, for this reason and many others, I don't think I will have children. HOWEVER, if I did get pregnant and have a child, I am confident I would be able to handle it well. I think that actually has something to do with my schizoid PD. The fact that i like my own company and own ways would make me be a good parent? idk, probably didn't make much sense there but good luck!! xx
I also think that the main question is do you WANT children? And this is going to sound mean but do you really love your girlfriend? As in look forward to seeing her etc? because personally, I never have in a relationship even with great people (like your gf) who accepts me for who i am.