How do I know if I'm schizoid?

I've always been kind of eccentric. But I'm wondering what sets personality disorders apart from regular old personality traits.

And what difference does it make? I know for a fact I'm independent, and I don't place much value in relationships. Sure, things can be hard for me sometimes, but I can attribute this to being a teenage girl. All other teenage girls buy into the "best friends forever" thing, so my friends expect it of me. But once everyone else grows up, I'll have no problem, right?

I'm independent, proud, cynical, and I haven't been attracted to a boy since 5th grade. I do really enjoy the company of my friends, but lately I've come to a point where I think I can take it or leave it. My friendships are all fairly shallow because I see no need to really let people into my head.

I get along really well with my friends. I'm not antisocial. I have very good social skills, I just don't place much value in the relationships.

Does that make me schizoid, or just independent?

i wondered the same thing. unfortunatly, i don't have anything to say about this, but maybe it helps to know that your not alone. i always wondered the same thing, but now im not so sure. I'm more like one of those people who just jump around a lot. well, i hope you can find the answers you need here. ^_^

I'd say you are independent.

From what you've told us, you don't sound like you fit any personality disorder pattern at all.

I suppose not. But truly, I can't even know what makes a personality disorder a DISORDER, not just a quirk!

Symptoms of schizoid, narcissistic, or histrionic disorders seem like they could just be personality types. Aspects of people that manifest more in some than in others. Quirks.

I think when the trait interferes with one's ability to function, that is when it bridges upon personality disorder.........I have been posting, looking for others with histrionic tendencies...I'm histrionic....does that seem you are too, and in what way, and what is your understanding of histrionics?

What actually is histrionic? I'd love to know.
riverx

Actually you are right about those traits being basic personality traits and yes, we all have some version of them.

I agree with a lot of what you wrote in your post. Friendships wax and wane and my therapist is always trying to get me to see that they have a beginning, middle and end. Of course, I'm mad at my T at the moment but he is right about some things.

Histrionic? Well, do you all remember Diane Downs the one back in the 80's who shot her three kids for a boyfriend. Farrah Fawcett played her on a life time movie. She is described as being Histrionic although, I would say a very extreme Histrionic.

From what I've read, histrionics are all about "me, me, me"...I have some of those traits

I think the difference between disorder and quirk is whether it impacts your life negatively in a big way or not.

And there is a lot of variation in terms of how much a person is affected.

Ultimately I suppose the difference is going to be in how an individual is diagnosed. And in how we each choose to view ourselves.

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Diane Downs the one back in the 80's who shot her three kids for a boyfriend. Farrah Fawcett played her on a life time movie. She is described as being Histrionic although, I would say a very extreme Histrionic.

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I'd say your assessment is right, a little extreme!

i don't know you well enough to give a proper diagnosis but i would say that you are NOT schizoid. you are just independant. you say that you enjoy seeing people sometimes and in my opinion; if you enjoy it, then you are fine. don't worry about it

But here's another question...

Let me explain my situation.
I've never had a problem being independent. I much prefer it. But there are apparently many people in the world who want more of me than I want to give. I'm in a good place right now because many of my current friends are great because they don't ask much of me. We simply have fun together.

I had a friend, however, who wanted the "best friends" deal. The relationship was very unstable because she wanted to be my friend way more than I wanted to be hers. Of course, I had reasons for not wanting to be her friend. So it sounds unfair, but I had to tell her that things had to be smooth as glass for me to stick around.

I explained to her that I don't place much value on relationships. I take them for what they're worth, and if they trouble me, then I'll cut them off, I don't need that extra negativity.

Here's the odd thing about me, and what I can assume is the odd thing about mental disorders.
It's not MY life that's negatively affected.

This is an instance where my personality caused someone ELSE turmoil. So who's to blame?

I found what you said there interesting..... which part of what goes on is a problem for you? is it you didnt want to lose a friend, or are you concerned about hurting other people?
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and............ you said </font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
I don't need that extra negativity.


</div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> ....... so, ontop of what negativity........ something in you?

It is perfectly okay to set boundaries and to choose who you want to have close relationships with. If you didn't want to be best friends, even though she really wanted to, that's not a disorder, it's having and expressing your preferences. Sometimes our choices cause someone a bit of discomfort. Did her insistance on you being her best friend cause you some discomfort? Does that mean that she has a personality disorder?

It really comes down to broad, long-standing patterns. When those patterns have a significant impact on your life, or someone else's, over a long period of time, then it might be related to a personality disorder.

BTW, one thing that is often said about personality disorders is that the symptoms of the personality disorder often do bother other people more than the person who has the symptoms. But then, personality disorders are often associated with other disorders and symptoms which do create problems and bother the person who has the disorder.

Magsanguis...

I honestly don't think ANYONE is to blame........I see life, its twists and turns, the people included and not included in it, as largely factors of personality, mine, and the person's personality I'm trying to decide whether to include or not......personality has GREAT deal of power over social situations, even ordering your food from a waitress and tipping or even whether one gets into a club....I believe personality plays even a greater cause of the scheme of things than even looks, money, even personality disorders less than OUR PERSONALITY QUIRKS...as you have nicely put it........

One more thing.....!!! had to write one more thing...

HERE are the traits of histrionics......not quite the same as murderers...

http://psychcentral.com/disorders/sx17.htm

@RiverX - Of course I'd like to avoid hurting people. Especially in my current situation with this ex-friend, because she's not taking it well. However, at this point I think it's likely that SHE's the one with some sort of disorder...
There's actually not much negativity in my life. Maybe a better word would be stress. I did fall behind in school not too long ago, and sometimes social problems can be a distraction. Plus, I'm starting a job hunt tomorrow, and on top of that, I'm too concerned with other friendships to be worrying about her inability to let go. My friend's birthday is tomorrow. We got him a Wii.

Since she's been "playing the victim," asking how I could do this to her, and claiming I'm heartless, everyone has lost sight of the fact that I was the one who was hurt in the first place. I lost a friend, too. But for a while I couldn't tell if I'm not affected by this loss because I'm overly insensitive, or because she's been harassing me nonstop and I'm glad I cut it off. I'm pretty sure I'm just happy not to deal with her anymore.

@Rapunzel, nice post. I had a few diagnoses as a kid, such as depression, but during adolescence it went away save for a bad case of PMS/PMDD. Now, we've just about completely eliminated all of my depression symptoms. My tendency towards independence has still followed me all through my life, and it puzzles people, but only in certain cases does it hurt them. Looking back, though, these friends are, ehrm, quirkier than I am.

@Junerain, I'm thinking that my independence is mostly just a shock to people. I have a good understanding of social situations, I get along with lots of people, and my friends even say I'm "obnoxiously polite" in dealings with servers at restaurants or sales associates.

I think I'm getting it now. I don't think I'm schizoid. I think I'm independent, but that trait is in pretty big contrast to my other traits, and to the way people see me.

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Of course I'd like to avoid hurting people. Especially in my curre

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sorry, I've been a forum where people are the real err...heavy duty schizs, and there wouldnt be much surprise at someone not caring too much.....
I've been in that situation too, where someone feels rejected by me and seems to want more than I want to give, it can feel kinda stiffling too .. whats a Wii...??

Thanks, I read that, got it I think. Still, those things could apply to a borderline or a narcissst too I'd think...?!

I beg ti differ in the comparison of narcissism compared to histrionics......histrionics are highly suggestible.....highly capable of being influenced BY OTHERS...(not a 'me..' thing) plus they believe their relationships are even deeper than they really are...I believe these things point to a more 'other' oriented personality for the histrionic..I find myself agreeing with whoever is with me, going along with their opinions, their feelings, their thoughts....and I place so much importance in what they have to say, like my very being depends on them.......

I can relate to that too. Theres this other aspect of N.ism tho, a milder version which I think I was more referring to, which is to do with the need to be like others and to be accepted, like the front that's put on to become liked and admired.
But the deep relationships bit, I do that too. That must be to do with a deep need ........... and for me relationships are difficult to maintain when I get close, theres usually a conflict wich capsises the relationship. How is it for you?

@RiverX - A Wii is a videogame system!

Yes, I find people CAPSIZING me challenging me to come up with my own ideas instead of merely going along with theirs....attacking me, quite often, even though I do nothing back they keep attacking...might be where i work though gotta find another job.

@Junerain...
I've known a few people who liked to attack me. For no reason sometimes. And if I set up a defense, they'd just come up with another attack.

I just had to find new friends. Even if a conflict started because I was upset, the other person would suddenly turn it into what was wrong with me (heartlessness, no values...). Which is why I wondered about me having a personality disorder.