Can't cope...

All these triggers. flashbacks. nightmares. panicattacks. waking up, remembering my brother is gone, knowing it's another day I got to get trough - somehow. Didn't even go to school today.
It feels like someone, something is holding me down, pressing me slowly in the water, my brother dying being the final straw
and now i'm really drowning
No one to help, no lifesavervest able to rescue me or at least keep me from drowning
it's to much.. I can;t do this anymore

(((((((((((((((((blue)))))))))))))))) im sorry you feel like this, remember people here are here if you need us or need to talk thinking of you xoxoxo

I'm Sorry things are so hard right now. Try to remember this simple yet helpful phrase... "this too shall pass"

There have been times where that saying has helped me through some of my hardest days.



Stay Strong and Be Well ~~ Jenn

dear blue!! You have been in my thoughts a lot. I am so sorry that the memories and flashbacks and pain are so strong. Do you talk with your fosters about it at all? I can't imagine how you get through your day--the fact that you have shows you indominatable strength. I have no words for you, only hugs and wishs.

no i can't... I can't talk about this

i know thats why my t is frustrated with me
even if she says she's not
I havent really said anything to her about anything
just go back home a bigger mess then i already am, afterwards
i hate it

I'm so sorry. Maybe you're not ready to talk about this, and that's ok. Give yourself time to grieve, and I imagine when you get to the anger stage you will need to talk. Right now your grief seems hopeless, but please know that people care about you. I understand you not wanting to talk right now - I've lost people I've been close to and you just don't want to talk, and I imagine people around you don't know what to say.

It's OK for you to feel how you do, but don't give up on your life because his life is over. I'm so incredibly sorry for your loss. There aren't that many words of comfort at this horrible time in your life, but give yourself time to grieve. You will never get over this, but it can get better. My heart goes out to you. I will pray for your inner peace and healing, but give yourself a break with this. Your therapist should be understanding about you not wanting to talk about it, but don't lash out. Just say you need time, and when you're ready you will talk.
Lots of love to you and your family.

i dont know anymore how to go on
or even why
just cause thats what we're supposed to do?
go on till the bitter end...
there's nothing to live for anymore
got nobody
every day and night im tortured by all the flashbacks and nightmares and such of the abuse..
I dont WANT to anymore

Blue93 you have been through a lot and suffered a great loss and at the moment it seems like the darkness seems never-ending - but there is hope even in the darkest night there are the stars to light the sky.

At this time your grief is all consumng - its ok to grieve - to let everything out - when its time to talk you will be able to talk to your T - I remember thinking I would never be able to let T close enough to see my pain - it took a long time but maybe now I have learned to open the door a bit so she can see in - you can do that too

Dont be hard on yourself - you need time to grive - time to heal - things can and do get better - sometimes we have to live second by second minute by minute until the darkness lifts - and we are here to talk to whenever you need to.

tkae care P7

maybe i cant get back up anymore

Please get back up. Don't let your life stop because his ended. Please know that you matter - you do. I'm worried about you and i don't even know you! But don't hurt yourself over this any more than you already have. Please get help. Please...?
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

dw about me
won't do something stupid
let's just say that if I walk down the street tomorrow and a car would kill me i wouldn't mind...

we'd mind and you can get back up - you just need time to rest before you do

i cant even stop things from happening
how am i ever gonna get myself get back up
fallen to much

Sorry I've got nothing good to say

Be Well and Be Safe

what can't you stop from happening? you can get throguh this - second by second if necessary

nvm i shouldnt talk about it
don't really want to anyway

I hope things are better for you

((((((((((((((((((((Blue)))))))))))))))))))))))

Beads wishes her would of seen this sooner.................
whether you beleive it or not, your ARE strong.........
someone worte to you that " this too shall pass"...........
they are right...it CAN and it WILL
please try not to be so hard on yourself
also this may sound a little harsh but you must also remember that we cannot change the past any more than we can control the future........
all we can do is live in the present, the here and now... and control our
reactions to it along with how we conduct ourselves and live our lives....

everyone greives differently, and you need to just let this very difficult greiving process kind of take its course without becoming your own worst enemy
bead will walk with you anytime ( all the time iffen you wants )
we hear your pain,
we will lissen
we DO care

Blue you Can and you Will get thru this..and remember you have a lot of freinds here that are praying for you and think of you offen ( beads included)

mary

no, not 'this too will pass'
i'll drag myself trough life day by day.. somehow..
but it won't be good anymore.. not after this...
everything gets taken away
even the most important thing in my life
the only thing i really cared about
no... 'this won't pass'

Hi cant cope Im sorry you are so sad Im here to talk anytime. Im homebound and have been where you are. Im new to this site just today
Actually, Im new to the internet , just a week now and have been looking for somewhere to chat with others about depression panic disorder, anxiety sadness bad pstd and anything else they feel like talking about. you can call me roxy Ill be waitng to here from anyone if anyone know of a chat line with this site please let me know. hang in there Cant Cope I will help you hold on please contact me. thinking of you Roxy

Blue,

things can get better - really they can - t may not seem that way - I dont know what was taken from you - but the oe thing people cant take from you is YOU - keep a safe place deep inside where no-one can go but you - is there someone in the real world you can talk to about this - talking can help if you find a professional or a close friend - if not we are here