[sugahorse1]

Right... So I'm kind of seeing T once a week, except when one of us has an issue.
The last few times I've really felt stable, and there hasn't been much to discuss. I can make an 'emergency app' for tomorrow/Friday.
The reason I'm considering, is that I'm battling. Circumstantial stress, but I can't cope. I've switched into survival mode and hope it passes. I don't care much for anything right.
I'm terribly emotional at the moment and just need some comfort.
I'm just not sure if T can help. My meds make me pretty numb, so while I am emotional, it's almost uncomfortable- it's there but it's also not.
Right-seems like that was more of a rant. But I also know you guys can relate- when the wheels fall off, the first thing I think of is T

[Can't Stop Crying]

Make that appointment with your T, I know I've debated that option so many times myself and find myself doing better when I make the appointment. Hang in there! The emotional part is so hard to deal with so I'm with you there!

[granite1]

sorry you are in such a state right nowi would make the appointment.i bet it may help.

[sugahorse1]

Thanks everyone. I just want to be able to tell myself to pull myself together. That I am doing ok. That I am doing my best. That it's ok to feel flat every now and again(my BP doesn't make it any easier).
And just get on with it.
Not need others to comfort me... There's no one around here right now anyway..

[eskielover]

My psychologist helped me through the rough time of year that I have.....then we were wondering what to work on....do I need to actually see T while ok except when things trigger or I have stresses that come up.

She actually suggested that I join the DBT group which I started going to the end of January....right after the worst time of the year ended. (between September/October & January). Well, going to DBT & doing the diary cards & tracking lack of eating & sleeping along with all the other stressers that I am experiencing because I have them written down now.....we have so very much to work on every 2 weeks when I see her. Never imagined that I would have that much to actually work on with my psychologist.

Do you have access to a DBT group through your T? That might really help teach you the skills that you can use to deal with the distress you are going through & also learn to pull together your emotional mind with your rational mind to come up with the wise thinking for situations you end up in. Between the group & working on the details with my psychologist, I have never experienced more successful therapy before.

Good thing to see your T with all you have going on with the stress at work, your weight loss & all the other things going on......it's important to be able to have T to talk through what you are feeling.

[sugahorse1]

Thanks Eskie. Will consider it. I don't think there's a DBT group anywhere. My T also only has one other patient apart from me - she was in the process of closing her private practice, until I came along and she realised I NEEDED someone to talk to. Hence I can make an appointment most times.
She lectures at universities and has some interns at a government run hospital that she oversees. I really do appreciate her.
We tried for me to only go every 2 weeks and I lost it. It scares me that I couldn't get through it alone, but oh well

[Sannah]

Originally Posted by sugahorse

The reason I'm considering, is that I'm battling. Circumstantial stress, but I can't cope. I've switched into survival mode and hope it passes. I don't care much for anything right.
I'm terribly emotional at the moment and just need some comfort.

I would work on this in therapy. Being emotionally healthy means being able to cope when things aren't going well.

[PTSDlovemycats]

(((HUGS)))

[sugahorse1]

Thanks.
Feeling betta today, still flat but not as emotional.

Didn't make an app to see my T today, so I wait another week

[SpiritRunner]

I've been following and thinking of you, too.....I hope it's a better week, since you are waiting to see T a while longer!

[WikidPissah]

hope you get to feeling a little more stable between now and T time. I am going thru something similar. T wants double sessions to allow time for me to get put back together before leaving, but I am thinking 2x a week might be a better option, since I am having a hard time making it thru the week without going into at least a minor crisis.

[sugahorse1]

Not sure what's going to happen going forward.
I kind of feel I'm at a stage where i should cope with once every 2 weeks, but it's my luck that when i do push the sessions out, i lose it. I then really need T.
So, what's it gonna be?
It's almost like i feel guilty going to T if I am getting better (Most of the time) and i should be ok with once every 2 weeks.

[Sannah]

I think that you still have stuff to work on (according to what you write here). IMO you going every week would be a good idea. If once every 2 weeks is hard for you to tolerate then the alternative is once every week. Guilt is getting you though?

[sugahorse1]

Yeah Sannah- in a way. I need to be stronger and be responsible for my own happiness. I shouldn't need a T to lean on

[Suratji]

Originally Posted by sugahorse

Yeah Sannah- in a way. I need to be stronger and be responsible for my own happiness. I shouldn't need a T to lean on

Oh man, is that a self-sabotaging thought "I shouldn't need a T to lean on." ? Well, my question is 'What's wrong with us needing to lean on a T?' We go through life always thinking we need to be self sufficient, independent, self-reliant, etc. And those thoughts get us into trouble.

But in RL, we depend on others for so much. We live in society, we live in community and we all need each other.

What a T does is provide some of the needs that may not be easily fulfilled in RL. It's easy to fulfill our need for food - go to the store. It's easy to fulfill our need for entertainment - go to movies, shows, etc. It's easy to fulfill our need for rest - go to bed. And many many other needs can be fulfilled in RL.

But why do we devalue the need to be heard, to be listened to with compassion? Why do we believe that that shouldn't be a need? Why do we believe that we should be independently strong? Why can't we believe it's o.k. to lean on someone?

We human beings are meant for connection. We are not islands. We need each other for support. Sometimes we offer support. Sometimes we receive support.

Sugahorse- I think you should return to your weekly sessions. Sure, you're better - that's the goal in therapy. But, if you're like me and many others, 'better' is just a stage in the whole journey. Don't deny yourself the help to continue to grow.

[Sannah]

Originally Posted by sugahorse

I need to be stronger and be responsible for my own happiness. I shouldn't need a T to lean on

Originally Posted by sugahorse

Just a quick example-i brought up in T that I thought a rupture in my relationship with my mom as a young child had caused the void and emptiness I feel. I kinda said to her I'd like to work on these feelings and maybe the relationship.
After that first discussion, I met my mom for lunch, and as much as I tried, I couldn't feel a connection (please let's not go into detail, cos I don't know how I feel about it).
In my next session I told T what had happened and that I had realised there just wasn't going to be a relationship there. That I realised I needed to accept it.
This stark change between yearning for a relationship, and then saying I was ok with how things were mapping out, have left my T pondering even more about me, and what's underlying.

Suga, are these 2 quotes related? I found your second quote on someone else's thread and I thought "wow, this is some important info to just put in someone else's thread and leave out of your own". And then I thought "why didn't Suga ever share this?"