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  #1  
Old Dec 14, 2005, 03:14 PM
complic8d's Avatar
complic8d complic8d is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2005
Location: state of desperation
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....they definitely don't like it.
The other day I figured I could get through the holidays feeling like this, but January, not so sure I want to. So I told my T this, and she was not real happy. She said, "I don't do deadlines.", which I understand. (And I'm sorry I mentioned it, was just letting her know where I am at.) I am just looking for a way out of this, one way or another. I don't like how long it looks like it's going to take, or the intense feeling "stuff."
Anyway, I wouldn't suggest mentioning a "deadline" to your T. I am "contracting for safety" from one appt. to the next. I think I am panicking because I won't see her for about 2 weeks over the holidays. I've been seeing her twice a week for a while now. She's my lifeline, so I'm not sure what to do. ???????????
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  #2  
Old Dec 14, 2005, 03:18 PM
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Im so sorry you are having a rough time. Do you have a friend that you could have lunch with twice in the next few weeks to substitute in for seeing a friendly face? You can tell everyone you want to have a Christmas luncheon. It might be fun. Or you've got us. PM anytime. Don't give your T a deadline...
  #3  
Old Dec 14, 2005, 08:59 PM
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(JD) (JD) is offline
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(((comp))) I have previously shared a "dead" line with my T... and received the support I needed to get through/passed it alive. Sometimes it's the only way we can communicate how desperate we are feeling. (I don't have to put my foot down like I did then, though, anymore.) But I live with the option... key word "live." My T is working to erase the need and suffering I undergo by "living" this way... and I hope yours will with you also. Isn't it good you have a T that cares?

I'm sure your T will be there during the 2 weeks, in case you need to contact? I know they won't go out of their way to say, "Sure interrupt my personal holiday down time and call me everyday."... but I know my T will be there if I have no other coping mechanism working for me...

Try and keep yourself safe. (My attitude is (and can be yours?) hey I have to have therapy 3x week just to maintain "life" and to expect me to be able to go ...xx weeks without any support is ludicrous! If I could do that, I wouldn't be seeing the T 3x a week, right?)
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  #4  
Old Dec 15, 2005, 11:17 AM
complic8d's Avatar
complic8d complic8d is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2005
Location: state of desperation
Posts: 799
Thanks for the support esther, unforunately I have no friends to do things with. That is the result of my isolating for so long. I would be too uncomfortable trying to act "normal" right now anyway. Thank God I have you ppl here! You are so supportive.
Sky, you are right, I guess it is explaining how desparate I am feeling, especially for after the holidays. She had given me her home and cell phone numbers a long time ago, and she is ok with me using them if I really need to (of course not without putting huge guilt on myself). I guess I will have to ask her about the holiday break, since I have been seeing her twice a week and can barely make it through the in-between times sometimes.
I hope you both have a wonderful holiday season. I am so grateful to have this site with all the great, supportive people. Love ya. HUGS!
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complic8d

"Don't say I'm out of touch
with this rampant chaos-your reality
I know well what lies beyond my secret refuge
The nightmare I built my own world to escape."
♥evanescence♥
  #5  
Old Dec 15, 2005, 01:00 PM
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Twinks Twinks is offline
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Member Since: Jun 2005
Posts: 121
comp,

I understand the pain you are anticipating in being away from your T. Mine will be away for only one week over the holidays and I am dreading that.

This is a good place to come for support. Any time, day or night you can express yourself. People here are very special and care.

I'll keep an eye out for you. I know it's hard to be independent for this long, but like Rudolph said to Herbie in the old TV special Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. " Let's be independent together"

Twinks
  #6  
Old Dec 15, 2005, 02:59 PM
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allthegirls6 allthegirls6 is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2005
Posts: 4,813
comp,

I know exactly what you mean. I see my T twice a week and stuggle during the in between times. Then she told me she as away for 19 days. Well you could have knocked me down with a feather. 19 days i screamed inside. How the hell was I suposed to manage for 19 days.

Well......................................... here I am at day 14! How did i get here, ive cried all the time! But i managed it and yes its hard, im left angry and feeling abandoned all because she needed a holiday. Its selfish of me to feel like that but its how I feel.

What im saying is that you probably will manage, but it wll be hard and you will find it lonesome. But you will get through it. But i think if you have your Ts numbers then use them if it gets too hard. Why else would your T have given you them, but to use when you are desperate? I know the struggle you have ahead, but honestly you can get through it.

Anyway, if you need help Im around. Lots of people helped/are still helping me with this.

It wont be the same as your T but at least its a place to come and say that things are difficult and people will listen. I know I will

Audrey
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  #7  
Old Dec 15, 2005, 08:17 PM
Overcastbutclearing Overcastbutclearing is offline
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(((((((((((((((Complic8d))))))))))))))))))))
Here for you friend!
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